Jez Jerzy Page #4

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on Saturday.

This airtime was paid

for by the election committees.

I thought you were

not my problem anymore.

I came to visit a friend.

Anyway, it's time to talk

about splitting the dough.

You'll get the money after

the concert.

- At least give me a f***ing advance.

- Don't be greedy!

I got you a monthly

travel card, haven't I?

Can I have an autograph?

Wow! Awesome. Fak it!

He's the best.

- All the 3rd graders love you!

- Scram! Go home!

He's even better live than on TV.

What's up, fak it?!

Cock! F***!

Let the artist in!

And now, for your pleasure:

George the Hedgehog!

F***, how am I supposed

to get there now?

Ladies and gentlemen,

let your idol rest a bit.

F***.

Zenek, what did we get from

all of this? I'm asking you?

What is all this cash good for

If we can't do what we really love?

Yeah,

it was different with our hedgehog.

We didn't have to ask anybody for

permission o kick the sh*t out of him.

- Those were the days.

- Yes, congressman,

- now it's the time.

- Now he'll support me? Good!

Ladies and gentlemen,

George the Hedgehog

will be right back

and he'll have something

important to tell you.

He's here! He's here.

Howdee, homie! Yo, homie?

Far out! Funky!

I dig your work, dude.

Yo! Fak it!

That was fun

but there are also important things

such as POLAND and the best person

to take care of it is...

He got stuck. Quick,

get the syringe.

What the f*** is this?

They didn't say they had more

of these!

It's a pretty stinky situation.

You had me at hello!

So that's what's going on!

Dude, there's only place

for one Hedgehog in this town!

You think it's me?

This is supposed to be me?

Listen, it's bullshit!

It's not me!

Come, son. Daddy will comfort you.

Look Zenek,

hedgehogs can swim after all!

Get him! Right now!

Get the hedgehog off him

you dumb fucks!

Easy.

Idiots!

It's the wrong hedgehog!

Fak it!

Zenek, we're leaving!

Think, think, think, think.

Watch out George!

Yola! Get out from here!

Congressman! Hello!

- I don't have time right now.

- Do something!

- But they will kill each other!

- Send an email to my office.

"Take matters into your own hands!"

Daddy!

Yes, son?

Years of work.

Years of sacrifices.

And this is what I get.

Let go of me!

I have to get in there.

George is there!

What? You don't like me?

Let her go!

I can't see!

Yola, jump!

Disappointed that your boyfriend

is not an idol?

Pull me up and I'll make you a star.

I'll give you so much dough...

- What the hell, Yola?

- Thank you darling!

- What are you doing, Yola?

- You knew what's good for you.

Damn girl,

you know how to build up tension.

- But you know that...

- I know.

You'd have managed on your own.

What's the PHD for,

they asked?

Unnoticed, unappreciated,

badly paid

My god, it's just like us.

...Forced to teach a band of morons,

Who instead of mastering

the beauty of M-xylen...

I've exposed you so cut

the bullshit grandpa.

Better tell me where

that smart ass from

Media Politics

F***ing President Consulting is.

Now you will be kissing my feet.

Son, it has finally happened

You've reached maturity

Go and enjoy every beautiful moment

of life.

Fak it.

One question - were we ever supposed

to meet under that bridge?

Under the bridge?

That's a funny idea.

It's good that everything came back

to normal.

So, nothing has changed between us?

Yeah, unless you'd like

to move in with me.

- I can give you the keys.

- What?! Into that shithole?

Come on.

Well, you know

I can't just leave my husband.

I'm catholic after all.

- So? Everything like in the old times?

- No, it will be much better

You just have to be careful when...

- I'm not sure I can reach that.

- Congratulations!

I knew right away that you

- the real hedgehog

- were on the right side.

- Hey, not the nose.

"It wasn't me!"

"Super Truth"

Surprise!

- Thanks George!

- What for?

I became famous.

Thanks to you the celebrities

of this world have noticed me.

I'm playing in a different league now.

- Lilka, honey, hop in.

- Oh, hi Tiger.

Stefan, the dinner's on the table.

Surprise! Look who came to visit us!

Please, give Michael a hug.

Go on, you're brothers after all.

Nice bling-bling. You stole it?

Stefan, Michael made

a fortune in the States!

There you go.

And everybody was mad at me when

I told him to get

the f*** out of this house.

Look, Michael is a Hollywood star!

What great sons I have!

Good afternoon.

Can Stefan come out and play?

Zenek!

Wait up, it's not what you think.

Zenek, let me explain that.

It's not that simple.

Mother used to work in tourism

and she went to Africa once.

It was all cool until

some tribe recognized

A M zimu in her, or something.

The blacks massacred

the whole group

And they kidnapped

and tortured my mother.

She managed to run away

and get back to Poland.

But beforehand, a sorcerer from

the village had put a spell on her.

And that's how Michael was born.

F***, nobody will even spit

in my face now.

Don't worry,

I won't tell anyone.

Everybody has a secret.

I was once kidnapped

by UFO from outer space.

What?!

F***. It was nighttime.

I was coming back from an Oi!

Concert

I got a bit lost and suddenly

I saw them:

Aliens from outer space

and their ship.

Strong lights,

strange silhouettes,

Sweet smell in the air.

They invited me on board.

It was amazing, I'm telling you.

And then in the morning,

a little problem.

The aliens must have performed

some tests on me...

You know, my clothes were

are messy and that pain...

They must have stuck

a probe into my...

No, don't tell me more.

Everybody has the right

to his secret.

The most important thing is, guys,

that everything came back to normal.

The cameraman is a wanker!

Can I have some

of that delicious pork dish

with the exotic name "Fak it"

It's time to start enjoying life!

You know Yolanda,

Once, during a friendly game of chess

I think it was in Buenos Aires

One famous check player,

listen to this:

He made a finishing move with...

With the queen!

Ladies and gentlemen,

This nomination

doesn't surprise anybody

The chosen person knows youth

and its problems very well.

Please welcome,

The new Education Minister!

To you I say:
Good morning,

To the dearest youth: Yo yo, wussup?

And to the teachers: F*** you.

Howdee? Halleluyah!

Boss, one vodka please.

- Sit in or take away?

- Sit in.

- 15 zloty.

- Last time it was 12!

We started charging

an extra 3 zloty donation

For the support

of Polish science

I've always supported Polish science.

And that professor, who is disgusted

with the student's knowledge says

"You want to finish your studies?"

And... The student replies: "yes".

To which the professor says:

"You just did".

A little anecdote from Uni.

Funny, isn't it?

I know a better one:

"What does the University President

should know most of all?"

"Where the dean is!"

No? How about that?

"There's a Pole,

a Russian and a German... "

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