Jimmy Vestvood: Amerikan Hero Page #8

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Vogue. Vogue. Vogue.

I love Madonna.

- That was the wrong video.

- You heard him.

He's a terrorist.

Congress is going to vote on

a resolution to attack Iran.

- It's all Jimmy's fault.

- Get him!

Oh-hh!

Lifetime of laughter...

Everybody,

we're live on kox news.

It's Hank shannity.

Hank, over here.

Guys?

Guys!

Do another one.

I was blinking.

Guys, remember me?

The wanted terrorist?

Guys, guys, over here.

Yeah, yeah, guys, guys.

What I meant to say is that

I am a terrorist...

If you believe this guy.

I knew that I had to convince

the American people...

Oh, crap.

...If I wanted to sell

my product!

That's the American way,

you see?

And I knew that I had to

make you out to be

- the world's worst terrorist...

- Shannity, shut that off.

That's the guy

that set up Jimmy!

- Shut it off.

- Go to black. Go to black.

Shut that thing off!

Uh... oh, uh, looks like

we're experiencing

some technical

difficulties here.

Let's get

to some other news...

Meet koko, a parrot who can

sing the star spangled banner

while she hops

on one leg.

Get them, get them!

No, guys, take it easy.

We're peaceful people.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

This is my son's wedding.

Let us not allow

a terrorist conspiracy

that almost led

to world war III,

stop us

from celebrating.

- Uh, dad?

- Yes, son?

Um, I also have

something to confess.

- You're a terrorist, too?

- Oh, no.

- I'm gay.

- Ha, ha. Yes!

- No. No.

- Wedding over. Wedding over.

You know what a mistake

you're making?

- You know who I am?

- It pinches.

Congress voted no

to war with Iran.

Jamshid fakhredinpour.

I am proud of you.

Oh, thank you, maman.

Thank you.

Maman, maman. Now

that you are feeling better,

please, for god's sake,

try my kebab.

Oh-hh...! Mmm.

Delicious.

Ugh!

She likes it.

Jimmy, you did it.

You're an American hero.

Oh Leila, don't be

so melodramatic.

I couldn't have done it

without you.

- You're the American hero.

- No, I insist.

You're the American hero.

Leila, don't make me insist.

You're the American hero.

Leila, oh, no, not the ears,

not the ears.

Oh, yes, the ears.

Leila, that's good earwork, yes.

Jimmy... Jimmy... Jimmy!

When there's no destination

that's too far

somewhere along the way,

you might find out who you are

- whoo!

- living in America

eye to eye

station to station

living in America

hand to hand

across the nation

living in America...

Diplomacy

may have won today,

but if I were America,

I vould vatch my back.

Oh, and I want to add the list

of black people who I like--

Oprah vinfrey.

I love her book clubs.

Many miles

of railroad track

all night radio...

To the east, hurricane Abdullah

is going to be threatening

the Manhattan skyline,

so all you intellectuals

might wanna get out

your prayer mats and

hug a cab driver.

- Shannity!

- What? Well, I didn't name it.

You might have to walk

the fine line

you might take

the hard line

but everybody's workin'...

Overtime

living in America

eye to eye

station to station

living in America

hand to hand...

Yah-hh!

She was just

polishin' the furniture.

Got to have

a celebration

I live in America...

One thing people don't know

about homeira?

Oh, she loves

to recite Shakespeare.

Beautifully.

"Two households,

both alike in dignity,

in fair verona,

where we lay our scene,

from ancient grudge

to break to new mutiny,

where civil blood makes

civil hands unclean."

I feel good!

With the reward money

I got

for turning in the terrorist--

who ended up not being

a terrorist

so they had to discount

the money, thank you

very much--

I was able to refurbish

the Cyrus cylinder

and fix the hole

in Jesus Christ.

- We love you, Jimmy.

- I love you, too.

Crap.

- Ah...!

- Cut.

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