Josie and the Pussycats Page #6

something to do with our music.

Why do you call it...

"our" music?

Becau...

Are you even listening?

I am listening

very carefully,

and do you know

what I'm hearing?

I'm hearing someone

glomming on to my talent...

and my credit.

"Our" music, Mel?

I basically write all of it.

Josie, no, you don't.

We write it together.

Oh, okay.

So if we're all doing

equal amounts ofwork,

why isn't the band called

Valerie and the Pussycats?

I knew it.

You've been thinking this

the whole time.

I'm just... I'm just

backup to you, huh?

Oh, but you're

a good, solid backup.

Oh, hey, Val,

who's a rock star?

Who's a rockstar?

I am!

Josie, don't do this.

We need to

stick together now.

Oh, my God.

Melody's gonna cry.

What's the matter,

snuggle bunny...

finally realizing

the world isn't all

sunshine and rainbows?

Stop it.

Not everyone gets

a happy ending, muffin.

Stop it.

And you wanna know what else?

Puppies turn into dogs...

who get old and die.

Someday you'll thank me.

Of course, by then

I won't be taking your calls.

You are the star! Val and

Melody are mean, evil girls!

You should have a solo career!

You have the number-one single

in the country!

They're trying to glom on to

your talent and your credit!

If they're doing

equal amounts ofwork,

why isn't the band called

Valerie and the Pussycats?

They're just dead weight,

Josie.

You could be huge without them.

You are the star.

Madonna huge.

Val and Melody are mean, evil girls.

Melody thinks you can't sing.

Seriously. She told me.

Dump them. The are trying

to destroy you, Josie.

You'll be better off

without them.

Who's a rock star?

You are!

A great big rock star!

Go, Josie, go! Go!

- Val!

- Oh, the return of the superstar!

What's going on?

And where are Mel and Val?

Since when you do you care?

Oh, and we heard what you said,

Bitchy McBitch.

- Wish I'd said it.

- They're gone, Josie.

They're gone,

and I hope you're happy.

No more band.

Just like the Beatles.

Just like the Jackson Five.

Just like a Flock of Seagulls.

- These are so good.

You want one of these?

- Okay, look,

I never thought

I would say this toyou,

ever, but, please...

would you help?

Now?

Now?

Wyatt gave me this CD

of our song,

and it was like

as soon as I heard it...

I don't know.

What... it sucked?

There's something on here,

I swear.

Okay, okay, okay.

You should have a solo career!

You could have your own

prime-time TV series!

We could call it Josie,

and run it right after

Will and Grace!

Oh, my God! That's

Mr. Moviefone! How did you

get him to put that on there?

You slept with him!

What are you talking about?

This is on our CD

It's underneath the music.

Wyatt put them on there...

to brainwash me.

Ooh, brainwashing!

Ooh, help!

We're being brainwashed!

Diet Coke's

the new Pepsi One.

"MS." Main... main system.

Music sequence?

Oh, God.

Maybe you broke it.

Whoa, I didn't touch it.

Josie and the Pussycats are

the best band ever!

Theyare totally jerkin '!

You must buy their CD

You have to see them in concert.

You also have to buy

Steve Madden shoes.

Heath Ledger is the new Matt Damon.

You're nobody without

an Abercrombie & Fitch vintage tee.

They're selling stuff

through our music.

Josie and the Pussycats are

the best band ever!

They're selling US through our music!

I knew there was a reason

you were so popular.

I want a vintage tee...

and Heath Ledger.

Oh, my God.

It's all my fault...

everything...

people dressing alike,

buying the same stuff.

I sold it to them.

I'm a trend pimp.

Well, it stops here!

I'm nobody's pimp,

and I'm not going to let Wyatt

and Fiona get away with this.

We're going to the police,

and we're taking this with us.

Are you guys gonna

help me or what?

Oh, I'll help.

Yeah, right.

'Cause you know I'm just gonna

let you walk right outta here

and spoil everything.

All right, now the event

I know everybody's been

waiting for is finally here.

One night only,

the worldwide live debut concert

of Josie and the Pussycats.

And, oh, very cool,

it's gonna be live

at the "Megarena"...

with a simultaneous

global web cast.

You can log on to mtv. com

for more details.

And remember:

You will not hear a thing

without your Josie

3-D-X headphones,

so I urge you all

to pick some up...

I know I bought two.

Hi!

Oh, look at the pouty girl.

Boo-hoo!

Well, you better

snap out of it, red, 'cause

you've got a show to put on!

Are you kidding?

I'm not gonna play, help you

send messages to those kids.

- Forget it. I'm done.

- Oh, look who's got all

principled all ofa sudden.

You didn't seem to mind when

your song went to number one!

You should kiss

my cellulite-free ass

for all I've done foryou.

I made you a rock star.

Tell me you don't love that.

I said forget it, all right?

Now, find yourself another girl.

Yeah, see, I would,

but everybody's already here!

- Josie! Josie!

- Too bad.

- Wyatt.

- Josie!

- Val, Mel!

- Don't talk to her.

You're wasting your time.

Miss Diva over here doesn't care

if you do something to us.

No, that's not true.

You guys, just listen to me.

I didn't mean

any of that stuff

that I said before.

Fiona and Wyatt have put

subliminal message tracks

underneath our music...

Can it, rusty.

Your story's boring.

Wyatt, why don't you show these

two lovely ladies what we have

for them this evening?

Gladly, my darling.

- A car!

Val, I won a car!

- No, you didn't win a car.

- Oh, my God, you won a car!

- No one won a car!

The car... is about to be

a part of history...

if you decide

not to play tonight.

Hi, I'm Serena Altschul

with MTV breaking news.

Josie and the Pussycats'

debut concert was

unexpectedly canceled...

when an automobile exploded

in the stadium parking lot.

The passengers were

identified as Valerie Brown

and Melody Valentine,

two of the founding members

of the popular rock band.

Investigators on the scene were

quoted a ssaying the two died

a slow, fiery death...

inside the four-wheeled

hell pit.

We're told that Josie will

be releasing a statement...

to the press within the hour

to comment on this tragedy.

Yes, Josie,

what are your comments?

We're all gagging to know.

Roast your friends,

or play the show?

Play your show?

Roast the friends?

What's it to be?

All right!

I'll play.

See, Val?

She still likes us!

Mel, of course I do.

You guys are my best friends

on the planet.

Look, I know that friends

don't treat each other

the way I treated you guys.

But you've got to believe me.

If I could just go back in time,

I would take it all back.

That would be cool.

If I could go back in time,

I'd wanna meet Snoopy.

Mel, I love that about you!

I love that you think

that everything is possible...

and that this world is

such a great place,

because you know what?

It is.

And I'm so sorry if,

for one second, I made you

think that it wasn't.

And Val... Val,

you bought me my first guitar.

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