Just Visiting Page #4
Need some help, sir?
Oh, it is beautiful.
The water comes out|by itself. Ha!
It is a magic fountain.
Look at this! Mmm.
It smells just like the forest.
All the forest|is in the small wheel.
Mmm. Smell it!
No. No, thank you.
You don't want to smell it?
Enjoy yourself.
The castle's a wreck.
So I'm helping her|divide the estate up...
...into more manageable,|profitable chunks.
We're selling the art|and various high-end pieces...
...through an outlet here.
Essentially, I'm protecting her.|I see that as my role.
And the land?
I decided|we should sell that, too.
It is not for you to decide.
Only Lady Julia|can say what will be done.
I speak for both|Julia and myself.
You cannot possibly|speak for a Malfete.
What are your wishes, milady?
Well, um...
I guess I'd like|to think about it...
...a little bit more,|actually.
Julia?
The lady has spoken!
Chicken salad, now!
I want that cake.|Come on now.
Don't take all night.
Greasy chicken.
What on earth|do you think you're doing?
Hi, Andre.
I'm afraid I'm going|to have to add an order...
...of chicken a la umbrella|to your bill.
Smell the forest.
Yes, it's minty.
It's from|the blue fountain.
Nice. Yeah.|Oh, all right.
Honey,|would you like a mint?
Yeah.|All right. Good.
Thibault?|Master.
Those are good.|Give me another one.
Yes. Very minty.
Ow!
Ah...
Good evening, fine sir.
I'm seeking|Thibault of Malfete...
...the Duke of Anjou.|The great chevalier?
Andre does not need a bed.
He will be happy|with some straw.
Yes.|We're out of straw.
My bed is soft.
It's time|for the "Family Feud."
Aah!
Oh! Poor little people.|They're trapped inside!
Oh!
God have mercy. What are we|going to do, my sire?
Free them.
Chuck, Marilyn,|Norma, Terry, and Linda.
Now let's start|the "Family Feud"!
Bunny? You really think|these guys have amnesia?
I don't know.
We are coming!
So you admit|they're clinically insane?
I didn't say that.
Oh, come on!
Where did they go, my lord?
They were inside.|We could not save them.
It is tragic.
Well, we never really|used this room anyway.
It's a pity.
Aah!
I need to find a wizard now.
Um...
Do you mind if I get|some coffee first?
Hi.
Jesus Christ!
I've told you|not to leave this stuff...
...in the middle of the driveway!|What are you trying to do?
You just about|broke my goddamn neck!
I'm sorry.|I didn't mean to.
Do you actually do|any gardening around here...
...or do you just|sing out of tune?
Just clean it up!
Aah!
Oh! Hey, big belly!
You dare to touch a lady?
Who the hell are you?
I'm Andre,|and I piss on you.
Yeah, well, you get|the hell out of here...
...or I'm gonna call the cops.
Apologize to the lady.
Lady? You're calling her a...
Lady. Right.
I'm sorry.
Kiss her feet.
Do what?|Kiss her feet!
Oh, Jesus!
Instead of a wizard...
I think what we really need|to find you is a good doctor.
Wizards are the best doctors.
What in the world is that?
What are you doing?
Call 911!
What is going on here?
He was very rude|to the lady.
Look, fool.|A coat of arms.
He is a nobleman.
I did not know.
Stupid peasant.
Who are these guys?|Visitors.
Do you own this woman?
She works for me.
Then I will hang my valet|by his feet on your behalf.
No, please, my lord.
Not by the feet!|I prefer the thumbs.
I got a meeting to catch.
Rise, idiot.
I give him to you|for the day.
You may beat him|if you like.
Thanks, but, you know,|we just met.
Thank you,|my great and merciful master.
Thank you, milord!|Thank you!
Let us go.|We have a wizard to find.
A wizard?
Are you French?|Yes.
Do you like it here?|It is very strange.
It smells bad,|and the food is too little...
...but the ladies are wonderful.
I wish my boss|thought like that.
Boss. Ha ha. Boss.|What is boss?
The guy you work for.|The big guy.
I can have his bones|when he's eating.
That is so disgusting.
That's so gross.
You have to figure out a way|to get away from him.
He's my master.|I don't want to be hung.
Hung!
You're not gonna be hung!
That's completely|against the law, Ok?
Ok. Ok!
Yay!
Does he pay a lot of money?
Once every month|he permits me...
...to hunt pheasants|on his lands.
So you make no money?
I have a treasure.
What do you|call that again?
The "L".
Oh, wait, wait, wait.
Before we get|downstairs to the crowd...
I've got this for you.|Here's my phone number.
I want you to wear this|just in case you get lost.
I will not get lost.
You can only be lost|if you have no purpose...
...and I have purpose,|which is to find a...
A wizard. Right.
I don't even know|where to start with that one.
I mean,|I have never met a wizard.
I don't even think|they make wizards anymore.
Oh! My purse!|Wait, Thibault! Wait!
Wait! No!
Take the purse!|No! No!
He's a thief.|I have to cut his hand.
No, no, no!
Please, just take it.
Ok. Everything's fine now.
Hang him in the public square.
Aah!|Silence, old woman!
You're not helping.
Witch! Old witch! Wait!
I am sorry.|I thought you were an old hag.
I've been called worse.
Thibault, why don't|you come and tell her...
Oh, no. Oh, no.
Ah, would you happen|to know a wizard?
Can you tell me|where to find a wizard?
A wizard.
Well.
Peasants, which one|of you can show me to a wizard?
There will be a reward.
Sir Lancelot here's|looking for a wizard.
Aren't we all? Ha ha ha!
I am not Lancelot.
I am Thibault,|Count of Malfete...
Duke of Anjou,|Baron of Orleans...
Lord of Libourne.
Yeah?|Well, I'm Sid from Cicero...
Duke of Hazzard,|Baron of Billiards...
...and Lord of Lord-knows-what...
...and I challenge you to a duel.
En garde!
Do not make me kill you.
En garde, I say.|You watching this, honey?
I should kill you|for your insolence...
...but I am too thirsty...
...so instead,|I will quench my thirst...
...and yours and yours.
Drink up!
Hey.
You're not gonna|believe a word of this.
Not a word of it.|Guess whose exhibit...
...had another visitor|last night?
There was sparks flying...
...and all sorts|of weird noises.
Then there was this poof.
Poof.
And a green flash,|and then bang, he was there.
Who was there?
The wizard-looking dude.|Wizard.
Look.
He burnt the bed spread|where he came in.
Absolutely shocking.
Wait a minute.
This wasn't here before.
He says he's Julia's cousin.
I say he's a fake.
I want an answer in 24 hours.
See, tiger?
Daddy's gonna take care|of this business.
You gonna be nice|to me again?
Hello?
Hunter, you're not|gonna believe this.
Bunny, I'm right here. Here for you.|I lost Thibault!
I lost him because|he was looking for a wizard.
And then he just...|freaked out...
Nobody just loses a guy...
...dressed like|a medieval knight in Chicago.
Well, I did.
Wait. Hold on a second.
Hello?
Yeah, does|anybody there know...
...the Count of whoop-de-do,|the Baron of blah...
Yes, I do.
Wonderful. Thank you.
All right, I found him.|I gotta go.
I'm so relieved.|Love you. Bye.
So he's back, huh?
Yeah. I was sort of hoping|he'd tripped on his cape...
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"Just Visiting" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/just_visiting_11510>.
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