Kenny Page #7

- I'm not out of f***in' control!

Please, do me a favor...

Oh, Jesus Christ...

...they've already lit

one of the toilets, the bastards!

Alright, guys,

there's a break, come on!

Come on. Go, go, go!

Go to the wall!

Oh, look at these mongrels.

What are you doing, Pat?

What are you doing?

Sammy, wait for...

Sammy? Sammy?

Get it up.

Oi! You spilled my beer,

you bastards!

Let go of him.

Oh, Jesus!

Put it out, Thommo. Put it out.

No, mate, me!

Leg, leg, leg! Oh, jeez.

Get it, Thommo.

Put it out. Get it!

Right, that's enough!

You've all had

enough fun now, alright?

Come on, you've had your fun!

Get going, you hoons!

Let's lock 'em all up, boys.

They're unlocked.

Let's lock 'em up. Alright.

You right?

Yeah, I'm alright.

Everyone alright?

Pretty crazy old night

that one, wasn't it?

I mean, that's really put me...

...to the end of my test tonight,

I tell you what.

That's... That's almost

my limit, I reckon.

I mean, no man

should be set on fire...

...trying to save one of

his shitters, you know.

It's... Ridiculous.

The problem is

it's Glenn's decision...

I won't be able to

have you here...

...and I'm sorry

it's worked out that way.

All I did was trot up there to try

and save the f***in' toilets.

But you punched the guy out.

He got in the way.

Sammy, every event we do...

...there's people in between us and the

toilets.

If you run around

punching people out...

...every time you've gotta

get to a toilet...

...we'll have to be sponsored

by Don King, mate.

We're plumbers,

you know what I'm saying?

Well, where was Pat?

Pat was doing

a backward flip, wasn't he?

Mate, I know he was

going backwards.

He's not cut of the same mustard of

you and me, mate.

And the point is, he's paid

as a plumber, not a title fighter.

He's a toilet cleaner, mate.

Mate, the decision's

been made.

And the reality is that

I've just gotta let you go.

I need this job big-time,

I'm telling you. I need it.

I'm gonna be evicted

from me house.

If I lose this job,

I'm gonna have nowhere.

No, you can't sack me.

You tell him I'll be here seven

o'clock Monday morning.

Sammy, I can't do that, mate.

You know that.

The only thing I can do for you...

...just to get you

out of a tight spot...

...is I can lend you

some money here.

Throw that

in your skyrocket there.

Thanks, Kenny. I appreciate it.

That's alright, mate.

Just sit there and

have a rest for a minute.

And just let me

grab you a coffee...

...and just sit there for a minute

and have a rest, eh?

Go, Kenny, go!

Dig deep! Go on! Dig deep!

Kenny, what are you doing?

Come on, Ken, work! Work it!

Work! Hold it up!

What are you doing, Kenny?

Come here!

You can't train like this, mate.

You either gotta give it

a fair go or get out.

Now get in there and have a go.

I might call it a night, eh?

I'm not feeling up to it.

You've gotta have

someone else to do this.

I can't do all this

with all the work we've got on.

With Sammy gone and bloody Pat off

getting married, Glenn...

I can't do this.

Look, you're going.

I've already booked the tickets.

What do you mean...

And you're flying

business class too.

But you told me

about this show.

This show's enormous.

Can't you go?

Listen, relax, you're getting

too wound up about it.

We'll cope down here, alright?

What's this?

Believe me, mate,

you'll have a ball.

It's Nashville, Tennessee.

You'll get over there,

you work a couple of days...

...the rest you'll just

enjoy yourself.

Did you know about this?

I'll be buggered.

Me own business cards.

Hello, Mr. Sacks,

how are you?

- Fine, thank you.

- Very good.

It's on the far side,

thank you very much.

How are you going?

Hello.

Mr. Smyth, that's

the far aisle, thank you.

No worries, alright.

There's a card there.

That's... I'm Kenny, obviously.

Alright.

Just if you need me

or anything.

So, down this way here?

No, the far aisle.

Alright, no worries,

thanks for that.

Gee, look at the size of this.

There's a lot of people here,

isn't there?

You pop your bags

up the top, do you?

Your bags go up the top,

is that right?

This is, uh...

little boy gave me this...

...just to bring this along

to remember him.

'Best Dad', it says.

It's not a bad award

that one, is it?

I'm, uh... I'm Kenny,

anyway, mate.

How are you going?

There's my card there, actually.

That's my name there.

This your first time on a plane?

No, you fly quite a bit.

Better whack

the old seatbelt on.

I wonder what the fine...

...for not wearing a seatbelt

on a plane is.

It's 150 bucks in a car,

it'd cost a fortune on a plane.

Ladies and gentlemen...

...from the flight deck,

a very good morning.

The captain speaking...

This is fun. This is fun.

I wish me boy could be here with me.

He'd love this.

Here we go.

Where does the... The?...

I'm not sure how that plugs in.

It must be... Screwed into

the backing plate or something.

Holy sh*t!

Hell's bells!

That is just off its tree.

They've won me over with that.

There you go, mate.

Sorry about that.

No worries.

Just watch it in there, mate.

That machine,

once you press that flusher...

...that thing'll probably suck your

guts out through your bum.

I don't know, I guess

this'd make sense...

...if we were going to Hawaii

or something...

...but it's supposed to help

with the circulation.

But I don't know how long you're

supposed to do it for...

...you know.

If I do it for five minutes,

is that the world record?

Or if I do it for two hours,

is that not enough?

Seems to be a problem

up there with the toilets.

Well, they certainly seem to be

fussing around with it.

I think I've broken the toilet...

...when I've undone the clips

on the back of it.

I'm gonna have to sort this out.

You right here?

Having trouble here?

Oh, yeah, look, it's fine.

The ground staff in L.A. will

deal with it when we get there.

Oh, that's fine. I've, um...

I actually work

with Splashdown.

We fix toilets. I can have

a look at it for you.

Oh, it's fine. Actually,

we can't let you in there.

Oh, no, no, this is actually what

I do. It's alright, I'll show you.

Yeah, I work with toilets

all the time.

This... There's a clip there...

...and there's another clip

just in there.

And once you...

Cheers.

Well, thanks for doing that.

- Oh, that's alright.

'Cause we're not

usually allowed to...

I mean, that would be...

- Oh, it's what I do.

Kind of what

the business does.

Splashdown.

- Yeah.

Corporate bathroom rentals.

It's alright.

It's nothing too flash

but, you know...

...here it is, got me,

it's got me traveling overseas.

In fact, this is my first time

I've ever been on an aeroplane.

No.

Ever.

I'm the first person

out of our whole family...

...to ever have flown

out of Australia.

And I got a nice little wine here.

Mind you, like I said, I don't

normally drink white wine.

That's actually not too...

- Chardonnay.

What do you usually drink?

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