Kenny Page #9

Synopsis: From the biggest festival to the smallest church social, Kenny Smyth delivers porta-loos to them all. Ignored and unappreciated, he is one of the cogs in society's machinery; a knight in shining overalls taking care of business with his faithful 'Splashdown' crew. Follow Kenny as he tackles every septic challenge that comes his way, culminating in a pilgrimage to that Mecca of waste management, the International Pumper and Cleaner Expo in Nashville Tennessee - or as Kenny affectionately calls it, "Poo HQ". With fly-on-the-wall honesty and wit, 'KENNY' lifts the lid on one of Australia's roughest diamonds as he juggles family tensions, fatherhood and sewage with charm, humour and unflinching dignity. "It takes a certain kind of person to do what I do... No-one's ever impressed; no-one's ever fascinated... If you're a fireman, all the kids will want to jump on the back of the truck and follow you to a fire. There's going to be no kids willing to do that with me. So, I don't do it to impr
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Clayton Jacobson
Production: Xenon Pictures
  6 wins & 10 nominations.
 
IMDB:
7.3
Rotten Tomatoes:
100%
PG-13
Year:
2006
99 min
Website
1,036 Views


He was a country singer?

- No, he's not a country singer!

Oh, he's the guy

from Russia. I know.

But all sorts of people,

all sorts of country...

If you stay here long enough...

- You get to see them.

It's a different world, isn't it?

It's a different place.

Look at the size of these ribs!

- It's huge!

No wonder they know what

they're doing with their toilets.

Look at the size of that.

They must give their

toilets a flogging over here.

That's why they're experts in it.

I'm sorry - I just realized

I always talk about...

...working with toilets

and poo and stuff...

...and it's only because

it's what I do.

No, that's fine.

- I'm used to it.

Don't worry.

Don't worry, it's fine.

I mean, I do the same thing,

you know?

What? You don't...

I do the same thing,

but 30,000 feet up in the air.

You have to clean the toilets?

Yeah.

Really?

Yeah, absolutely.

This guy in first class

had gone to the bathroom...

...flushed the toilet...

...put the vacuum - I don't know,

for whatever reason -

...reverse cycled.

He came out

covered head to toe.

Oh, you're kidding.

No.

It's alright.

Hello?

Oh, hello.

I mean, if you can't control him from the

lounge room...

...how am I supposed to do it

from Nashville, Tennessee?

Yeah, well...

Well, pop him on the phone.

G'day, mate.

It's my boy.

How you doing?

I'm good, mate. I'm fantastic.

And a what?

Yeah, well, you might want

to just hold it there, mate...

'cause that's a fair bit.

I don't know

if I'll fit it on the plane.

We'll have to hire

another plane!

Yeah, and behave yourself,

will you?

Don't... Don't upset

your mum too much.

Alright. Love you, mate.

That's me ex-wife

that rung me up.

She's something else.

She is the chief commissioner

and senior sergeant...

...of the fun police.

She's here to outlaw fun altogether.

There's your pad.

Thanks for that.

- Thank you.

Every time, every time

without fail...

...that I'm having a good time,

or I'm enjoying myself...

...or I'm not at work

and I'm just calming down...

...or like I'm here, she rings.

Well, glad you're having

a good time.

I am having a good time.

- Yeah.

Don't say that out loud

'cause she'll ring again.

She knows.

Now, I've got a small confession to

make.

Oh, really?

Yeah, a bit of an apology

or a confession.

I'd never been on an aeroplane

or seen the toilets on them...

...so I wanted to know

how it worked.

So I pulled the lid

off the back of it...

...and I left one of the clips off.

Are you serious?

And I didn't put

the thing back on.

So, sorry.

It's working now, isn't it?

I got it fixed, didn't I?

- Yeah, it's fine, it's fine.

Anyway, let's not...

- Oh, God.

It works now. You should eat.

- Yeah, I will.

Before your meal gets warm...

...and I should

before mine gets cold.

Look at the size of this thing.

No wonder there's no longer

dinosaurs on the earth.

They've killed the last one.

Here it is on me plate!

There you go, Jackie.

Watch the gutter there.

Watch your step. You right?

- Oh, thanks, Kenny.

Just watch it there, Jackie.

- Thank you.

Don't slip over. I'd hate that.

- Ooh!

Alright, well,

I'll see you later, then.

Oh, thanks. Hey, listen, do you

want a lift? It's pouring rain.

No, it's fine, I'm only just...

- I'll take you somewhere.

No, I'm only a couple of blocks

from here.

I don't mind walking.

Are you sure?

- Yeah, I love the rain.

I honestly do.

- You're crazy.

I'll see you later.

- Hey, listen.

You know, I've got

tomorrow off...

...so maybe I could help you

shop for your son.

Yeah.

- I could show you Nashville.

Alright, well,

I've got a deal for you.

You show me round Nashville...

...and I'll show you

round the expo...

...so you can see

what I do for a job.

OK, that's a good deal.

- Wanna do that?

I'd love to.

- Oh, that'd be great.

Well, we'll meet, say,

9:
30 at the front, yeah?

Yep, 9:
30 at the front.

- Alright.

OK.

- That's perfect.

Put your belt on. You'll get

yourself in trouble. You right?

She's a nice girl, isn't she?

Looks like I'm gonna have

half a day off!

Which would be good.

Good on her.

Good on her.

You know, it must be

very difficult for Jackie...

...to do a job like she does...

...you know,

flying around in the air...

...in a tube full of strangers...

...lob in countries

with people you don't know.

You know, it sounds very glamorous

but I'm sure it's not.

You know, and even I've found

since I've been over here...

...that you see things that

make about as much sense...

...as a nun at a rock concert,

you know.

And sometimes you just want to turn to

someone from home...

...and say, "Did you understand

what he's talking about?"

I mean, has someone

rung the Queen...

...and let her know what they're doing

with her language?

Ladies and gentlemen...

...put your hands together

for the next bullfighter!

This is the way we do it

in Nashville, Tennessee...

There you go.

- Ooh. Look at this guy.

...show up, drink shots

and have fun.

Hey.

I reckon I know

who that guy is.

Serious. I met him yesterday.

Like, he's not a mate.

I met him.

He's a Japanese businessman.

Go, boy! Hee-hoo!

You would not get me

on that thing...

...for all the money in China.

Or Japan.

20! Whoa! Whoa, there!

Mate, you looked fantastic in there. That

was a pretty big fall.

You looked like

the bloody Sushi Cowboy...

...up there on the bull.

Sushi Cowboy.

- Sushi Cowboy.

It's not that great, man.

Where's all your mates?

Where's all your buddies?

Oh, they're at Hooters,

you know, with the big, big...

Oh, hello. Bing bong.

Yes.

But you guys go ahead, so...

I go back to the hotel.

Oh, there's no need for you

to go back to the hotel, mate.

Don't let a bloody sore leg and

a bad back stand in the way...

...of a good night.

You can stay with us, if

you want. We've got no plans.

What do you want to do?

Give it up for

the Sushi Cowboy!

Hello, Nashville!

Sushi Cowboy!

He's had a pretty big night,

hasn't he?

He sure has.

His bull-riding days are over.

What time do you fly out tomorrow?

3:
30.

Oh, OK, so pretty early.

Yeah.

Sorry, I'll get your lift.

Well, thanks

for inviting me out tonight.

I had a ball, Jackie, I real...

Did you?

- I honestly did. I did.

Oh, good. I'm glad you came.

It was fun.

Yeah, so am I. Here's your lift.

- Oh, thanks.

Well, um, do you want to

go up to the bar?

I...

A drink or something?

I'd love to, Jackie,

but I really should...

I mean, the bar's open

for another hour.

Yeah, I would,

but the meter's running...

...and I better get the Sushi Cowboy back

home safe.

He's off with the fairies, so...

- OK.

But, look, tomorrow,

if you're free tomorrow...

I'd love to see you

before you go.

That would be great.

Have a coffee

at the bar at midday?

I'd love that.

That'd be really fun.

- Well, I'll come back tomorrow.

OK.

Yeah? Just watch out.

That lift is gonna snap you like

a twig if it closes on your chest.

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Clayton Jacobson

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Kenny" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2025. Web. 23 Jan. 2025. <https://www.scripts.com/script/kenny_11672>.

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