Kevin Hart: Laugh at My Pain Page #2

---

What? You little...

I'm leaving

cuz I have to work.

Not cuz I'm scared.

I'll come at dawn

and keep bothering

you till

I get my deposit back.

Oooo, you scare me.

Don't even try

to run away.

Or you'll have to watch

your back for life!

Sh*t...

STORAGE:

Sh*t.

She coming or not?

Hey!

I was about to visit you

in the hospital.

- You okay?

- Yeah.

Damn it...

Joo Dong-hyun's case...

Han-jin Credit Union case...

Let's just

collect that and stop.

My wife's loan shark

wants help

with evictions

instead of the money.

Says he'll pay, too.

So he ain't

a complete a**hole.

Sorry,

but can you help me?

Sure.

- Enjoy.

- Thanks.

Let's eat beef blood soup.

It's good for you.

Though you can't taste things,

get your nutrition.

Taking vitamins, right?

Eat before it gets cold.

IOU FOR JOO DONG-HYUN

This tastes bland.

- Leaving already?

- Yeah.

Go to a motel or something.

You'll get sick like that.

I'm going to

Myung-dong Market.

Chinese lunar holiday

starts today.

Take care!

- Bye.

- Ciao.

Leaving work early

on purpose?

F***.

I'm talking to you!

How dare you

ignore me!

What's this b*tch!

The f***!

I'm talking b*tch!

What are you doing!

Get her!

Hurry, fools!

You owe me the money!

Don't ignore me!

I'm sorry.

Please don't do this.

What!

This thing's real?

You crazy b*tch!

You can't

even sell her organs.

Where ya

gonna sell her to?

- She's a virgin, right?

- Sure thing, boss.

That's good.

The fools

f***in' her can deal

with her bleeding to death.

She'll die?

What the!

The hell!

What the?

Open up!

Hey!

You can't eat that...

Open up!

Who the f*** are you!

That girl's

gotta pay me first.

What the f***!

I don't hit people.

Then get hit and die,

f***er!

Hey! The car's moving!

Car coming!

My head!

- Kill him!

- Son of b*tch!

The car's rolling down!

FOOD VAN OF LOVE

What the heck?

- Inspector Park!

- Yes?

Come here.

Let's go.

Are you okay?

Doesn't it hurt?

Thank you

for helping me.

Pay up, b*tch.

You already took $5000.

Wasn't that the deal?

Still, pay up.

Do you like me

or something?

Crazy?

Then why keep following me!

I have absolutely

nothing!

I don't even have

a room to lie down

in this damn,

big world!

So, don't mess

with me anymore.

I'm about to lose it, too.

What the f***...

Ms. Joo Dong-hyun?

- Joo Dong-hyun?

- Yes?

I heard

you are a hemophiliac.

Shouldn't you go

to the hospital?

No, I'm fine.

Did you get hurt

anywhere?

No.

And Mr. Park Nam-soon...

But this says

Park Nam-jin.

That's my real name.

To put em in the slammer

for a while...

Damn,

they hit you bad.

That's at least 3 weeks of

medical treatment.

Go to the hospital,

first.

I'm not in any pain.

- You're not?

- No.

Hey!

Now I don't even have money

to take out the stuff to sell!

Who needs free sauna coupons,

I can't even go!

I have to live out

on the street now!

Really, I have nothing!

So, stop following me!

Hey!

Stop! You can't even get

$100 for this!

I gotta make a living!

You're no human, a**hole!

I got a room in my house.

$180 a month.

Sleep there

till you pay it off.

What?

I'm sick of chasing you

for petty cash! F***...

For real, sir?

Been deceived all your life?

I'm a black belt in Taekwondo.

The f*** I care.

When you're done paying,

scram!

Right...

Then...

I have some other stuff here.

Lots.

- Almost there.

- The hell?

- ls this it?

- Yes! Thank you.

Sign here, please.

Sign? Ah, sure.

Where are you going?

Don't ask

where I'm headed.

This isn't easy to ask.

Please,

don't get me wrong.

I don't think you do,

but just in case.

Do you like...

I don't feel anything.

Damn scrawny girl...

My name's

Joo Dong-hyun.

Living in the same house,

we should exchange names.

I know your name.

You live alone

with no family?

They're all dead.

Me, too.

Why're they dead?

Can't you use better words?

Like pass away?

Pass what?

Dead means dead.

Just call me Nam-soon.

Park Nam-soon?

Pretty name.

Sh*t, whatever.

Careful! Watch it!

Use that room.

That...

And that.

Don't touch.

And never ever wake me up.

If you need money,

take it from here.

But don't take

more than $30 at a time.

Use the dishes up there.

Don't touch

the ones down here.

Where are you going?

Don't ask me

where I'm headed.

Gotcha!

Sh*t.

You can all play here now.

Oh no!

Analgesia ...

ANALGESIA:

insensibility to pain...

Excuse me.

Ever heard of hemophilia?

You have hemophilia?!

You're awake?

I didn't wake you, did I?

You said you don't feel

anything for scrawny me!

No, it always gets like this

in the morning.

Don't go in there!

What's this?

What was that?

Blood clotting serum.

You heard,

my blood doesn't clot.

- Did you get it checked out?

- Why? I'm not sick.

Garlic, onions

carrots, oranges,

peanuts, seaweed, and fish.

They help clear up the blood.

I never eat that.

If my blood gets clearer,

I bleed more and more.

So, I smoked in middle school

to dirty up my blood.

What are you, a vampire?

Oh! That's right!

Listen.

I have hemophilia.

Vampires have

Porphyric Hemophilia.

Hemo means blood.

Philia means love.

They both have

great love for blood.

That's why they use

the same word. Get it?

I'm a total vampire.

You've lost it...

So...

You can't

taste things, too?

I didn't see your medical

files on purpose.

I don't feel sick!

Right! It's an illness.

- I'm not sick!

- Fine.

Geez! You scared me.

- I saw you.

- How?

Watch.

This tastes spicy.

It's tear-jerking,

hot spicy!

Books say that you can

train to recognize taste.

Taste is a sense.

Try this.

Think of it as rehab.

Say, 'Ah'.

Hey, look.

We spoon kissed.

This is yours, bro.

This one's mine.

The hell.

Who're you calling bro'?

Shithead, fool...

Uncle, mister,

and bro.

I chose the nicest one.

Then, how about sis!

Just call my name.

Mr. Nam-soon? Sir?

- Drop the sir.

- Just Nam-soon?

Hey, Nam-soon?

We just have this area

left to tear down.

Any progress

with the compensations?

Compensation?

When someone living

in a shack

hears of redevelopment...

They ask

for a 700ft apartment.

Damn...

Seoul is a complete hell.

Gushing with greed

and earthly desires.

What the f*** is this!

Sh*t!

Son of a b*tch!

Sh*t.

Hey, is there

a payphone nearby?

I looked all around,

but can't find one.

Doesn't she have a cell...

I don't have a cell phone.

I like payphones way

better.

Why are good

and cheap stuff gone

and replaced

with expensive things.

It was too dusty...

Where are you going?

To buy glue

for the broken dish?

Hold on!

I have extra strong glue

I use to make accessories.

I'm sorry.

I won't touch it again.

That belonged to

my family.

I'm so sorry.

- Here! You should...

- Hey!

I'm really good at gluing.

Can I do it?

Just go in and sleep!

No need to yell.

See! Give it to me.

Let go!

Hold on!

That hurts.

Don't be a sissy.

Just rip it off.

One, two!

No! No! No!

You're like a doc.

Operating

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes