King Of California Page #4

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[Door slams]

[Woman laughing]

Ooh!

[Record stops]

Morning.

You...

Uh, Miranda?

What happened to my car?

Miranda...

Did you wreck it?

I couldn't pay the rental

on the backhoe.

No way.

So, your car

was a necessary sacrifice.

But we're almost there,

Miranda.

We are so close.

Jesus Christ.

I'm sorry, l...

I'm really sorry.

I just wasn't thinking.

You never do.

Well, I'll get it back.

- How are you going to do that?

- I don't know.

But I will.

Well, I guess I'd better

get a move on

since I'm going

to have to take the bus.

Can't you get a friend

to give you a ride?

I don't have any friends.

What about that skinny one

who only eats carrots?

Carrots-and-Mountain Dew-Julia?

Right, Julia,

carrots, right.

She had an eating disorder.

She went to the hospital

and died.

Oh.

Well, in that case, maybe I can

go back down and get the car.

I'm sure he hasn't

sold it yet.

It wasn't that the car

was in such great shape.

- I'm sure the car...

- Stop! Stop!

I loved that car.

I know you did.

No, you didn't

because I never told you.

Why? Because you never listen.

All right, I'm an a**hole.

That has been established.

Not to the extent that

I'm about to establish it.

You make fun of everything

I do, including my job.

No, I'm proud of you working.

Don't... Yeah, right.

You know, I'm the one

that's paying the bills.

No, it's wild.

Isn't it?

You don't take anything seriously, do you?

You think the world

is just here for your amusement.

- Look at the world.

- I do.

But unlike you,

I have to live in it.

I just...

I don't understand.

You're a really smart guy.

How can you keep

doing this year after year?

What do you mean?

The treasure is just like

all your jazz combos, Charlie.

Just like the tour boat

that sank,

just like the Mexican

holistic medical degree,

just like your marriage.

How come you can't

see that?

Everybody else can.

There's something

really wrong with you.

## [Mariachi]

I can't believe

you sold my f***ing car!

[Woman over P.A.]

And now... Oh.

[Electronic feedback]

And now, I give you

Orange Grove Estates' 1,000th family.

Let's give them a hand.

[Children giggling]

[Child laughing]

[Chattering,

machines beeping]

[Woman]

# Oh, my home #

# Is just floating all away #

# My dreams #

# Take to the road #

# As I try to stay afloat #

# In this flood #

# And this flood of dreams #

Welcome to McDonald's.

# When you were mine #

# The sky was so high #

# The forests were green #

# And the stars were bright #

# Now I've got the road #

# Leading me off

cleverly... #

Have a good day, sweetie

- Okay.

- Okay.

# Oh, my home #

# Is floating all away #

# My dreams #

## ["Hail to the Chief"]

[Miranda narrating]

After he found his bass again

in that pawn shop in Atlanta,

Charlie swore

he'd never pawn it again.

He swore he'd pawn

his own mother

before he'd pawn that bass.

[Snoring]

- [Whispering] Charlie.

- [Snoring softly]

- Charlie.

- Snorts]

Have you eaten anything?

Uh...

No.

- I'll go make something.

- Oh, no, it's cool. It's cool.

Why don't you sit down?

Used to look out here,

you'd see one,

maybe two lights.

Your mom, she used to complain

all the time about being

in the middle of nowhere.

It's still the middle of nowhere.

There's just a lot more people in it now.

You didn't have to sell

your bass and records.

You just have to know

when to give up.

Dad, don't.

I told you,

I'm finished with music.

That's not what

I'm talking about.

Um, excuse me.

- Hi.

- Hi.

Would you like to try

some chowder?

[Charlie]

So let's hear it.

[Miranda]

Okay, well, a lot of the doors

claim to be alarmed

but they're not.

[Charlie]

How do you know?

[Miranda]

I opened them.

[Charlie]

Well, that's fine.

We'll make a good scofflaw

out of you yet.

[Miranda]

Most of the people are really nice.

Everyone says I could be looking at a raise

within six months,

and the benefits are great.

[Charlie]

Hold on, here. Let's focus.

Tell me about

the security guards.

[Miranda]

They have two of them.

They only work in the daytime.

Come on, come on!

[Miranda]

One of them is named Mike.

And the other one

is named Bruce.

Security guards

have master keys,

but the manager,

he's the only one

who has the great

grand master key.

It opens every single door.

He calls it the "God" key.

[Man]

I think you're doing great,

by the way.

[Miranda]

Thanks.

Kelly and I sometimes head

out to the beach on Saturdays.

We have a little barbecue,

play a little volleyball.

Nah, you play volleyball.

I just listen to Jimmy Buffet

and soak up the rays.

I'm a total parrothead.

Do you like the beach,

Miranda?

I can't even remember

the last time I went to the beach.

I bet you'd look great

in a bikini.

[Charlie]

Miranda.

[Miranda]

What? Let me finish the story.

Did you...

Did you get sort of

a weird vibe

from these people?

- Kind of.

- Yeah.

That's because they're swingers.

What?

Do I gotta draw you

a picture?

What are you

talking about?

- You don't know, do you?

- No.

So nice that you don't

know everything.

Swingers, um...

Well, they're, you know,

people who like

to spice up their life

with different partners.

Oh!

Oh, my God.

They were talking

swinger code.

Oh, God,

that is so gross!

What am I going to do?

Why? Wh-What's the matter?

- They invited me to a barbecue.

- They what?

You were the one that told me

to accept any and all invitations

so that I can get to know

the people and the layout.

But I didn't mean that

you were supposed to go and...

I didn't know that

they were swingers.

It's cool, all right?

It's cool, it's cool.

Y-You just...

You don't have to go.

I told them that I would,

and, you know,

I thought I could maybe

get at Doug's keys.

The God key.

- Yeah.

- Mm.

No, no. We...

We can't do this.

I think I can take care of myself, Charlie;

I've had a lot of practice.

You know, sometimes

I just wish you'd call me "Dad."

Okay, I can take care

of myself, Dad.

Thank you. I mean, you're what,

I'll be 17 in 3 weeks.

You're gonna be 17?

I gotta write this down, man.

You are so young.

But, you know,

you act so old.

Sometimes you're very, um...

- Precocious?

- Precocious, yes.

Now, I forbid you

to go to this barbecue.

You hear me?

Okay, I won't.

Are you going

to promise me that?

Okay. God.

[No audible dialogue]

# See the curtains

hanging in the window #

# In the evening

on a Friday night #

# A little light shining

through the window #

# Lets me know

everything's all right #

# Summer breeze

makes me feel fine #

# Blowing through

the jasmine in my mind #

[Doug]

One of the perks

of the management position:

Half price on all seafood.

Have some before

it's all spoiled.

It's a virgin,

by the way.

Berry flavored.

Miranda, did you bring

your bathing suit?

No. Why?

You don't have

a swimming pool, right?

Hot tub.

[Chuckling]

- Huh. Um...

- Dude! Dude!

We need some more chairs!

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