Klovn Forever Page #2

Year:
2015
149 Views


You're a family man!

But I'm in a different place.

There's nothing here for me!

So I'm taking off.

Could you grab the bird?

- Will you take it to Iben?

- Aren't you taking it with you?

I can't bring it to the States.

So, could you take it to Iben's?

It's her week.

We have shared custody.

Take care.

Bye-bye.

Alright? Bye-bye.

Say hi to the family.

- Hi, Iben, I was to bring this to you.

- 'Bring'?

- From Casper. Your shared cockatoo.

- Never heard about it. I don't want it.

- Then why did he say it's yours?

- I can't help it if you fell for that.

- I think it belongs here.

- No, it doesn't. There. Go.

Tell him that when he's man enough

to look after his daughter -

- I'll consider looking after his

lame peacock for five minutes.

But until then, he can go f*** himself.

Take the damn chicken away!

- Oh my God, what now?

- I can't handle talking about it.

And I can't handle that you're not here

in time for baby swimming.

You say:
1, 2, 3.

Lift the baby -

- and push it gently

to the other parent.

- I'm relatively shaken, honey.

- Focus.

1, 2, 3, now.

- It's a pretty bizarre goodbye, honey.

- There's nothing you can do, honey.

- No, but...

- Let it go. Don't obsess over it.

He found a house over there!

He's not coming back!

And he's completely abandoning me.

- Okay, send him to me.

- I just did.

Where is he?

Has someone seen a baby?

Sweetie!

He's gone!

Jackass! Why didn't you

grab him when she said 'now'?

She didn't say now!

She really didn't, honey.

- I did say 'now'.

- No.

- I said:
1, 2, 3, now.

- Well, I didn't hear you.

- I did say it.

- I'm not sure you did.

I did.

I was a bit out of it

because Casper left for the States.

I think it's great that he went.

He's a party animal.

- It's true!

- Sure he is.

Do you know what, Mom? He sends

Frank pictures of him having sex.

May I see?

- They're not...

- They're on your phone.

- I deleted them.

- Let me see.

- Oh, you didn't delete them.

- Are they still there?

Oh, my...

- Is that her head?

- Yes, it's a standing 69.

Why is her head upside down?

And what's that thing right there?

It's gag drool. When the willy

hits the throat, she starts salivating.

- Not much love in that.

- It's pornography.

- I don't want to look at it.

- I for one think it's good he's gone.

- You have nothing in common anymore.

- Find a new friend, Frank.

We have a blast, Frank.

It's me and five other famous dads -

- and Claus Meyer shows us how to make

exotic lunch boxes for the kids.

- Who's your best friend, Lars?

- No doubt about that! It's Tina.

They're asleep, honey.

- Frank asked who my best friend is.

- And what did you say?

I said:
Tina.

A great buddy. We have the rule

here in our Little Tuscany -

- that every night, when we go to bed,

Tina says:

I love you, Lars.

And the first thing out of Lars's mouth

in the morning is:

- I love you, Tina.

- Yeah.

But your food is always...

What, honey?

Grab Malthe's bag.

...so these caring grownups

volunteer to watch out for the young.

- It's not entirely safe.

- Have you ever been in danger?

- Yeah, sure.

- So, honey. Let's go.

- Lars is a Night Owl.

- Oh, okay.

Remember we talked about

making a difference?

Okay...

- There.

- Damn, what an idiot.

Bye-bye!

It's funny that they've

named their house.

We should do that too, honey.

We could call it...

...Chestnut Grove or something.

What do you think?

I'm wondering what I should do now.

Work-wise, everything's changed.

Casper is gone.

Maybe I should start a blog.

I often get hopping mad over stuff.

I could get it all out in a blog.

Do you think you love me

as much as Lars loves Tina?

Honey, if you're banking on some

adult entertainment, you can drop it.

- I can't handle it right now.

- That's not what I was talking about.

- But you're touching me and everything.

- Yes!

I can't handle it!

I'm under so much pressure!

- I'm not talking about sex!

- Oh?

And besides I can't do it yet.

In case you hadn't noticed.

My peepee hasn't healed yet.

And... I mean...

We need to go shopping tomorrow.

We're out of diapers.

- Do you hear me?!

- Yes. Nice overview.

Well, you don't have it.

Where did we park?

- Well?

- Level 3. Like last time you asked.

Excuse me... Oh, hi Frank!

- Hi, Nikolaj!

- Hi.

- Nikolaj.

- My wife, Mia.

- Mia.

- Nikolaj. What a coincidence!

Yes! Great news about Casper!

Dropping everything and taking off.

Yes. It's pretty wild.

- An adventure.

- And what are you up to?

Frank isn't doing much.

He's going to start blogging.

- No, I'm not going to blog, honey.

- I thought you wanted to.

No. I had an idea for a movie

about bloggers.

- A feature film about bloggers.

- Right.

And I have a friendship book

coming out. A book with Casper and me.

- It could very well be a giant success.

- Hell, yeah.

I have to tell you, Nikolaj...

you're so good as that knight...

- Thank you. You watch the series?

- Oh, yes!

- I'm a big fan.

- Wow. Thank you.

- This is our level.

- No, this is level 2.

Come on, honey.

- Great seeing you.

- It was lovely, Nikolaj.

This is stupid.

God, he's handsome in real life.

FRIENDSHIP THROUGH STORMS

Remove the papers, we're decorating.

Remove the papers, please!

I'll just... take care of the laundry.

Ole and I are moving in,

so that we can give you a hand.

- Is there an end-date on that project?

- No, not at all.

Let me just put

the laundry basket here... Yes, super.

- Honey, I'll finish reading upstairs.

- No, Dad's napping up there.

- In my bed?

- Yes.

He's tired.

He's an elderly man, Frank.

Oh, man.

Seriously, Christensen...

- Honey?

- Yes.

I have to go to the States.

To see Casper.

- You can't. You're on paternity leave.

- But you have Ole and Pykker now!

- Uhm, they just sit and watch TV.

- I have to try to salvage it!

- Why were you outside all night?

- Because the book is really good!

He shouldn't sell the damn house.

He's a moron, but he's my friend!

- I'm going over there to get him back.

- No! I don't think...

I'm off to LA!

- Mom, did you hear that?

- Yes, he's off to LA?

- He can't. Didn't you tell him no?

- Yes!

- Majorca?

- No! He's going to see Casper.

Okay, stay away from South Central and

the bad areas and you should be alI set.

Have a good one.

Frank? Up here!

Hi!

- What do you think?

- It's steep, huh?

- It's a mountain!

- My bag almost rolled away from me.

It's a mountain, Frank!

- Home, sweet home!

- Wow.

Place to hang out,

playing backgammon, chillin'.

- But here's the best part!

- A pool?

Hey, girls!

Say hi to Frank.

Hi, Frank.

My buddy, Jason.

Jason, this is Frank.

- Welcome, Frank.

- Thank you!

- Jason, were we class of '86?

- '86, brother, '86.

The girls are just a bit of eye candy.

Do you... do them?

Yes, I got a p*ssy snout

only this morning.

Your snout in the p*ssy.

And then three snorts.

- Three breaths?

- Yes. Kicks off your day!

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