Labor Pains Page #6

You're crazy. What

are you thinking?

You might be interested to know

that I got a promotion and a raise.

I can't believe we're

actually related.

As soon as I can

I'm gonna come clean.

Things are complicated.

The company depends on me.

I have heard enough.

I am out of here.

Morning, Thea.

Last month's

and this month's.

Wow, early.

That's a first.

I've got

something for you.

Oh, you made these?

Yes.

I went with marigold

because it's neutral.

Thank you.

Hey.

Hey. Okay, not that

you're interested,

but the word is that Nick's

divorce is finalized this week.

Garth told me.

Garth told you?

I've been hanging out

with him, Miss Busy.

I took the liberty of picking

you up a calcium-enriched smoothie

and a bran muffin. I figured you

might be getting a little backed up.

Thanks, Greg.

You're welcome.

Excuse me.

Greg's worried about

you being backed up?

Constipation is a common

problem for pregnant women.

Ach.

Well, lucky for you you're

not actually pregnant.

Or do you even

know that anymore?

Of course I know

that. Obviously.

Hi, sorry to interrupt.

Wanted to get you a little

something. I ordered it off of eBay.

It's an armadillo foot for,

for when you're in labor.

It, it wards

off the evil eye.

Thank you so much, Carl.

That's so sweet of you.

I'll keep it with

me the whole time.

Oh-kay. I know I told you to go

along with this for a few weeks,

but you're starting

to freak me out.

Things are going

really well for me.

It's not because of the

stomach. You're doing good work.

The only thing you're

doing bad is walking around

with a load of bullshit

strapped to your stomach.

Nick. Nick.

Nick.

What's up?

You won't believe who

left me a voicemail.

An Associate

producer from the Vista.

No way.

She read the book,

loves it,

with Claire's

approval, we'll be in.

That would be

the greatest thing ever.

Oh!

Oh.

Sorry. I, I'm a bit

of a closet hugger.

I, that won't

happen again.

That's, that's okay.

Nick, Jerry for you.

Oh. Uh, put

him through.

How you holding

down the fort, Nicky?

Good, Everything's

going great.

Working on a little project.

You haven't done

anything stupid, have you?

No, of course not.

You're doing

great, sweetie.

Do me a favor, Nick. No little

projects. Don't do anything.

Don't touch anything. If you

need a project, try Match. Com.

It's been awhile since

you've seen any action.

Okay, Jerry. I'll talk

to you later. Thank you.

It really hasn't

been that long.

I'm, I'm sure.

Um, okay. I got a lot of work

to do. So, I'm gonna go do it.

Okay. Bye.

So the book comes

out in three weeks.

That, that gives us

plenty of time for publicity.

I hope you don't mind.

I just couldn't

take it anymore.

Oh, wow.

I can see!

God. I don't know if you know

this, but you're pregnant.

Your sense of humor really takes

a dive after nine o'clock, huh?

Is it after nine?

Yeah.

Oh, my God, I'm slave-driving

a pregnant woman.

Not at all,

I want to be here.

I do, I feel I'm

making up for lost time.

And I'm really grateful

you've given me this shot.

So, thanks.

It's my pleasure.

You should be at

home with your fiance.

Right. My fiance.

I'm taking you home.

But, I promise to have

ridiculously high expectations

of you in the morning.

Thank you.

Well, here, no, no.

Okay.

Is this your first?

Yeah. I can't wait.

And you?

It's mine, too.

Would you

sign this, please?

Oh, that's amazing.

What about

Thea? Thea?

Absolutely, you.

No, no, no.

Yes.

No, I stay

behind the camera.

You, over here

right now.

Come on, give it a shot.

Oh, yeah.

Work it.

Nick.

Make love

to the...

Sorry. I know you don't

actually say that. I'm sorry.

Thanks for coming here with

me. I had such a craving.

Are you kidding me?

I love mud slide pie.

I think we could use a

little more whipped cream.

Oh, did I tell you we

signed Bournachle?

Thanks for hooking

us up with him.

My pleasure. Oh, I may

have some good news.

I may have gotten us two

spots in Sunshine Daycare.

Great. Thanks. I haven't

even thought about daycare.

I don't know how you do it,

with your kid, your pregnancy

and your job. I can't even take

care of my little sister, Emma.

I wish my mother left

me user instructions.

Well, there are no

hard and fast rules.

You just have to go

with your gut.

Yeah, well I certainly have no

shortage of gut at the moment.

Well, when all else

fails, sugar and shopping.

Very persuasive.

Hi.

Hi. Is Emma here?

Hi, Emma. Can you

babysit tomorrow night?

Oh, I can't,

Donna. Sorry.

I have to study

with my friend Chloe.

Um, I can do it.

You know, good practice.

That's right. Oh, God.

Thea, you are the best.

Tomorrow night at eight?

Yes.

Great. Bye.

I don't even know who you are right

now, but you're definitely not the best.

Do you wanna make cupcakes and then

maybe go shopping at Forever Twenty-One?

No. Actually I'd rather scrub

myself down with a pineapple

than do that.

I don't know what to do.

This was Dan's idea. He was all, like,

let's have a baby. It'll be so cute.

You know? I was,

like really?

Really? Well, let's strap 50

pounds of cement to your torso

and see how fun it is then.

You know, I just...

Yeah. I know.

I understand.

I just need a drink.

Or some weed.

I know it's scary.

I mean, the fact that we're gonna

have these tiny fragile humans

totally dependent on us. It's

kind of freaking me out, too

Really?

Yeah.

'Cause, Thea, you just,

you seem so together.

Oh, hi.

We need to talk.

What happened?

Okay, thanks

for listening.

Uh,

I uh,

I kind of got into

an altercation with Miles.

What are you talking about?

He was kissing another

woman. So I confronted him.

And he told me

he's not the father.

So I punched him.

You what?

I punched him.

I couldn't help it.

You deserve better than

that, Thea, a, a lot better.

Nick, Miles

is not the father.

He's not even

my boyfriend anymore.

The truth is,

there is no father.

I mean, there is but it was a one-night

stand and he's out of the picture now.

Thea, there is nothing wrong

with being a single mother.

Okay.

The printer has a

question He's on line one.

Okay.

Oh.

What was that about?

He looks like a maniac.

I just told

Nick the truth.

How'd he take it?

Okay. He doesn't think I

should be with Miles anyway.

Yeah, but what did he

say about the pregnancy?

He didn't say anything

about the pregnancy.

What's there to say?

Thea. We should talk. Do you

want to get a beer after work?

A beer? You know

I can't drink.

Is your stomach growing?

Well, I'm nearly

six months now.

Hi, how are you?

Where's my

sister, Emma?

Hey.

How was practice?

Fine. Same as usual.

Really? That's funny because Coach

Henretti told me you quit a month ago.

I found this in your backpack.

You've got some explaining to do.

That's dried cilantro.

Yeah, right.

Smell it.

Okay, maybe it is. But

where were you today?

At Jake's,

waiting tables.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes