Land Of The Lost Page #3

Synopsis: Palaeontologist Rick Marshall takes Will and Holly into a new world of danger, dinosaurs and big bug-eyed lizard people while trying to find their way back home and, too, save the universe and in doing so saving his reputation. With the dinosaur with brains, brawn and personality and the adventure of scientific advancement and exotic beasts in a far away land, it all adds up to time traveling fun and frolics.
Director(s): Brad Silberling
Production: Universal Pictures
  2 wins & 9 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.4
Metacritic:
32
Rotten Tomatoes:
26%
PG-13
Year:
2009
102 min
$49,392,095
Website
1,581 Views


When have you ever

been in this situation?!

I've never been in

this situation before!

Just tryin' to keep up morale!

Oh god...

I sure hope that was a Coyote.

Good god, it's a feeding station!

If anyone knows about

meal presentation, it's me.

Oh god, oh god!

Grab hands!

Create some momentum and

swing over to that tree.

Extension!

Reach!

Good form everyone!

Working in concert!

Don't be afraid to point the toe!

One more!

One more should do it!

Everybody move out!

Cha-ka, your master

commands you to-

Bad Cha-ka!

Your loyalty is now in question!

That was a Dinosaur?

T-Rex!

Definitely in predator mode!

Would you hurry up,

you're slowing us down!

Why are you wearing high heels!

They're not high heels, they're

my Floor Shine Zipper Boots!

Why are you wearing Floor

Shines on a field expedition!

I told you I was no prepped

to go into the field.

Wait, wait! We need a photo!

Nice field skills, Holly!

Stand over there!

What?!

This is proof that I'm

right and I want photos.

Stand there we need you for scale!

Scale?!

Marshall, do we to

turn on Red-Eye feature?

Yes! His eyes do look red.

Jesus Christ, just take the picture!

Okay just stand still!

-Stand still please.

One, two, three...

Fantastic, run!

Run like hell!

Where the hell's the monkey?

Look!

Cha-ka's waiting for us at

the other end of the bridge!

Good Cha-ka, your master is pleased!

Marshall!

It really looks like he's just

trying to destroy the bridge.

Chaka, wait!

Master not pleased!

It's okay, he can't cross he

has terrible depth perception.

Thinks this chasm is

a million miles long.

He's not what you'd call an athlete.

Mister T-Rexes.

See?

Walking away in utter,

and helpless defeat.

After all their brain

is the size of a walnut.

Their sense of smell may be acute, but eye

sight, hearing, all of his higher functions,

completely compromised by

that walnut sized brain pan.

I mean forget about the Polish.

It's the T-Rexes who were

the real dummies of the world.

In fact Chaka, funny story...

Run!

Follow the monkey!

He's looking at you, Marshall.

He's watching you.

He's looking at everyone.

No I'm certain he's looking at you.

He is grumpy.

I think that's what we

should call him, Grumpy.

It's a cute name.

Is it gone?

Yeah.

P*ssy!

What a puss...

This'll work just fine.

We'll call this base camp.

No, no...we cannot stay here!

Bad things happen in caves

folks, watch your movies!

Guys, can we just please take a

minute to absorb this, I mean...

We must be, the first ones to ever step

foot in this world, it's incredible!

Oh god, we're screwed.

No, no!

Chaka, no...No!

Okay you know what?

I don't want Chaka sleeping

in the cave tonight.

Whoa! Not cool dude.

No, it's a reasonable

precaution alright?

He was just about to be executed, and I think

he might've done something to deserve it.

Hey my man is right here.

Obviously he has feeling, okay?

Doesn't have feelings!

Man, come on look at him he's adorable.

He's a little cuddle machine.

What?

Yeah, least you can do

is let him defend himself.

I don't speak monkey.

Anyhow...do you?

No I didn't think so.

Here let me try.

Chaka?

He says he's a prince

amongst his people.

And the victim of a treacherous

plot to steal his throne.

And the only thing he's

ever guilty of was...

Is love.

Brother, give me a break.

And he's been treated far too harshly

for the very simple crime of...

Pooping in the village well.

That's why you're not

sleeping in the cave.

I can't tell anymore.

Okay mister...

Silently

- F*** you!

Whoa, hold on! Where

you going with that?

I'm just gonna block the first point-of-egress

here so that we're not vulnerable.

No...no...

Bless your heart.

Classic, tender foot mistake.

Don't beat yourself up over it.

Here's the thing.

Never put anything near the mouth

of the cave to draw attention to us.

Did you not just see that we drew the attention

of a highly intelligent psycho Dinosaur?

Look I think the "Ph.D" after my name means

I know a little something about Dinosaurs?

Dinosaurs are creatures

of brute instinct.

Like I said before it's got

a brain the size of a walnut!

Okay? You got me?

A walnut.

What's that?

What's that?!

Sweet Gregor Mendel...

What? What is it?

It's a walnut.

Well, obviously this

is between you and him.

Day 2, 0600...Zulu time.

Did not sleep last night at all.

Not one bit.

Still no sign of the tachyon

amplifier our...our only way home.

Field rations are...are

running dangerously low.

Thusly, I've made the determination that

if need be, if faced with starvation...

we will cook and eat...Chaka.

I've been thinking about

this a lot actually.

If Chaka meat were the secret ingredient

on Iron Chef, I'm sure Bobbly Flay would,

probably serve it with a roasted

red peppers, and a dash of cumin.

And a braze of polenta.

Wouldn't be an easy thing to do but...

but if you slow roast the little guy I'm sure

that Chaka meat would just fall right off the bone.

Fruit train coming through!

Fantastic! I'm absolutely starving.

Which fruit shall I-

Whoa, hold on a second there Holly.

I don't recognize that

genus of succulent.

Perhaps the native

inhabitant can help us.

Chaka?

Rick Marshall!

Chaka!

Are they safe?

To eat?

Eat? Eat..eat?

Eat!

Eat, eat?

Thank you Chaka!

Thank you so much, for listening to me.

Sorry for doubting you my little friend.

Has a pungent flavor, smells good!

Very meaty-

Jesus Chaka!

What the hell?!

Friends?

Friends?

Well? Yes, technically I guess.

However I am your master.

We have entered into a verbal contract.

You need to understand that.

Holly, quick to the cave mouth.

Sentry positions!

Looks like a plasma discharge.

Or maybe beta-rays!

Marshall?

Marshall!

Marshall?

Help...

Me...

Please...

I will.

Marshall?

Marshall, where are you going?

Someone or something knows we're here.

It's in my head calling to me.

Get back Holly!

What are you doing?!

I've seen this before!

He's got the jungle madness!

We gotta put him down while

he's still has some dignity left!

Chaka, let's roll!

What?!

You see?

This is the place!

A beacon!

A transmitter!

What the hell?!

Stop it!

Well I'll be...

I guess you weren't crazy.

Okay...

I'm man enough to say that's my bad.

Wow, has incredible architecture...almost

like the almanac culture of Western America.

Reminds me of the prudential building.

I'll bet somebody's

growing weed in here.

Feel that?

That ambient energy?

Just like at Devil's Canyon.

Yeah, tachyon radiation.

Marshall, the meter can't be far.

Finally something cool huh?

What, no reaction?

You guys have seen that before

too I take it huh? In your lab...

What's this thing?

Maybe this is where ancient

ancestors hosted the latin Grammy's.

Just picture Santana

hauling this sucker around.

It vibrates.

I wouldn't touch that alright.

Do you believe in life after love!

That is so dumb and childish.

Do you believe in life after love!

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Chris Henchy

Christopher Thomas Henchy (born March 23, 1964) is an American screenwriter and producer. He is best known for being a creative collaborator with Will Ferrell, including co-creating the website Funny or Die and writing several Ferrell films, including Land of the Lost, The Other Guys and The Campaign. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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