Larry Crowne Page #6

This is not personal, Mrs Gammelgaard.

It's just, well, times have changed.

Oh, shoot!

When we bought this house,

I thought I'd see my kids grow up

on this street.

Man, you're whining

like a goo-goo, ga-ga baby,

when you got your health,

you got no family to support.

You're pale in America.

You're a clean slate.

You're starting over.

I just hate to leave.

Well, manifest destiny is taking you

someplace else, neighbour.

You took the time to meditate

on the vagaries of life,

You'd come to realise

that a woman with a measuring tape

is money in my pocket.

How you ladies doing?

Oh, this is a nice one right here.

An old football table.

David Beckham actually owned this one.

Now, I got a offer for 1,800.

You just gotta beat that.

Showers should clear

before the morning commute.

Look for sunny skies by 9:00 a.m.

with temperatures in the mid-70s.

These topics are to be researched

until you can wax poetic on them

for two minutes.

- What'd you get?

- Potatoes.

Spuds. Can't wait.

No repetition, no pauses.

"Disraeli"? What is that?

"Who" is that.

Guy from Disrael. I'm done!

No notes, no visual aids,

just sacks of charm.

"Geography Show"?

- That says "George Bernard Shaw".

- No, it doesn't.

Well, the handwriting's kind of loopy.

Then "Geography Show" for two minutes.

- Pasta!

- Great.

Good luck, everybody. This is your final.

You're dismissed.

Have a good day.

Oh, thanks.

Let me get this straight.

You think dropping my class to open

a thrift store is a good idea.

Not by much.

Mercy? Mercy, come and meet this girl.

She brings passion

to Feminism and Modern Lit.

We should all be a witness.

And she's leaving me.

We've met.

That was some night, huh?

I'm sure you and Larry Crowne have

your pillow talk.

Pillow talk?

Lance is a sweetie,

but I think he was born in the 1950s.

Lance is forever mute on the subject of you.

Can't get a peep out of him.

Lance? Larry Crowne? Who?

- One and the same.

- He works at Frank's Coffee Shop.

- The pie place?

- Great French toast.

At the end of each chapter

is a study guide.

Master those and you will have mastered

the course pack.

Where's Talia?

Where's Talia?

Master my course pack

and you will take over the world.

By now, you should be laughing with me.

- Hey, there's Lance.

- Oh, yeah.

What a surprise.

Somebody skipped Matsutani's class!

I dropped out of college today.

What?

No, Talia, don't be a fool, stay in school.

And don't drink and drive, or do drugs,

and quit smoking, and eat vegetables.

I don't, I stopped, I did, I do.

New watch for you.

Hey, we all got free tattoos.

I wanted something in Japanese,

so check this out.

That one says "courage".

That one says spirit".

Courageous spirit.

I can see you!

This is glass! I can see through glass!

You know, that's Chinese, and it says

- soy sauce.

- Oh, shut up!

It does. Soy sauce!

Be here for our grand opening.

Oh, I might not make it.

Some of us have finals.

Hi, Larry!

- Mack.

- Yeah?

- Got room for one more?

- I can try.

Thanks.

No room for your furniture?

Well, it's a tiny place.

How much you think you're gonna get

for this sofa sleeper?

I don't know. You'll get me a good price.

You're a smart man, Larry Crowne.

Pizza's here at last!

Here's that lunch I promised you.

Did they tell you that I had one of

these discount coupons?

Son of a cock.

Larry Crowne.

Jack Strang.

Two extra large, a salad bucket

and a box of cinnamon frosted eggs. $16.50.

Sorry to say this, but I need 2 bucks back.

Times are tough.

Tell me about it.

You know what, forget it.

- Keep the change. Yeah.

- Really? Yeah?

Hey, thanks, Crowne. I appreciate it.

Every buck helps.

Put that right there.

Lamar, don't touch the cinnamon eggs.

I'm not gonna touch

the cinnamon eggs, baby.

I don't want a cinnamon egg.

- I'm gonna miss him. You, too.

- Yeah.

- Oh, Larry.

- You're the best.

Come back and see us.

Larry, I got something for you.

Good luck.

- Well, I appreciate it, Lamar.

- If you win, I get half.

Quick Picks. You never know.

Bye, Larry!

I'm gonna miss him.

- See you, Larry!

- Goodbye, Larry!

There is not a woman in the world

that has not been standing

where you are right now.

So, let's get it on. Come on!

Come on, let's go.

There you go, there you go.

Yeah, baby, come on.

Come on, come on.

- How much change do you want back?

- Why don't you keep it?

But just remember,

a teacher once gave you a $12 tip.

- You stay in school.

- Thank you.

You're a babe. Where do you teach?

I'm divorcing a professor turned writer

turned blogger

with the libido of a 13-year-old

with two published books to his credit.

When a man shows his true colours,

that's when a woman has to make

the decision to go or no go.

And we got pizza to go.

Good morning, Larry.

Good morning.

Should I have been calling you Lance

all this time?

Oh, no. Only one person calls me Lance.

Well, and all her friends.

I met her. She's an interesting girl.

She's a unique bundle, yeah.

And all this, you know,

my clothes are her idea.

I had actually put that together.

You ready for your final?

Well, you'll find out.

I drew

the order last night.

- And?

- You're last.

Lucky me.

- Thank you, by the way.

- What did I do?

- Kept our secret.

- Oh.

I don't do many things well,

but I can keep a secret.

Gentlemen do.

Allow me.

Morning!

- Good morning!

- Let's make a few changes.

A box of biscuits, a bag of biscuits,

a biscuit mixer! Say it!

A box of biscuits, a

bag of biscuits, a biscuit mixer!

Mr Mack, get loose.

Red leather, yellow leather.

Red leather, yellow leather.

Red leather, yellow leather.

Red leather, yellow leather.

And we're moving, we're moving!

This is like Tainot-palooza! Breathing.

Giving birth to relaxation.

Pasta comes in all shapes and sizes.

Farfalle, otherwise known as butterfly

or bow-tie shaped pasta...

Because Australia's been an island

since the beginning of time,

some awfully goofy animals can be

found there. Kangaroos, of course...

If you're on the Moon

and look down at Earth

you could actually see and recognise

the Great Lakes.

They comprise 20% of the world's

fresh surface water supply.

Aurora borealis can be found

in the northern hemisphere

in Alaska, Canada, and Scandinavia.

- Everybody loves potatoes.

- How about that?

French fries, baked potato, potato chips,

scalloped potatoes...

If it was the romance novelist in him

that made Victoria, the Queen, such a pal,

chalk it up as another brick

in the legacy of Ben Disraeli,

Earl of Beaconsield,

educator,

and Prime Minister of Great Britain!

Yeah!

Boom.

Dibiasi, that was great.

That leaves only Mr Crowne

and George Bernard Shaw.

Uh, that's "Geography Show", remember?

Right, the study of the Earth.

Yes, study of the Earth, and there goes

my opening remark.

Thank you.

The equator

is that imaginary line

that separates the Earth

into the northern

and the southern hemisphere.

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