Last Holiday Page #2

I need it for longer than that.

My dear sir,

I'm going to tell you something.

You've come into something big.

And how do I know?

It's the look in your eye.

A special look.

And what does it tell me?

It tells you

I've come into something big.

Quite so. But how big is it?

I don't know. Nobody knows.

Or if they do know,

they've never told us properly.

And I'm leaving for it in the morning.

The 15th?

The same suite that you had before?

Well, I'll speak to

Mr. Gambini about it, madam...

but I don't think it's possible

to reduce our terms.

Yes, very busy indeed.

Good-bye, madam.

- Yes, Mrs. Rockingham?

- I had a message from Mr. Gambini...

asking me if I'd call at his office.

Oh, yes. Uh -Well, I'm afraid you'll have to

wait a few minutes, Mrs. Rockingham.

Mr. Gambini has Mr. Prescott with him.

- A light?

- Thank you so much.

Thank you.

Good afternoon.

I have a room booked here.

My name's Bird.

Oh, yes, Mr. Bird.

A single room, wasn't it?

Will you sign here, please?

Just your name and address will do.

I haven't any address, I'm afraid.

Not any address?

No. I've been traveling about

a good deal lately.

I like travel, you know. Don't you?

I like what I've heard about it.

- Oh, I see you've been lucky, Mr. Bird.

- Have I?

Oh,

I see what you mean,

I'm sure Mr. Bellinghurst

will appreciate your kindness.

- Thank you.

- Not at all.

Uh, Mr. Gambini,

Mr. Bird has just arrived.

Oh, Mr. Bird. Welcome to our Regal Hotel.

I am Gambini, the manager.

And if at any time you have the smallest

complaint, please come to me.

- I hope you will enjoy your stay with us very much.

- Thanks. I hope so too.

We have many important people

stay with us, Mr. Bird.

This gentleman you see with me -

he is Mr. Prescott...

secretary to Mr. Bellinghurst,

cabinet minister.

- Is he here?

- Yes, yes. He spend his convalescence with us here.

And many very rich

and very important people.

You said you wanted to see me,

Mr. Gambini.

I can't wait all day, you know.

Of course, Mrs. Rockingham.

I'm sorry to keep you waiting.

This way, please.

Just a little formality.

Miss Mellows, see that everything

is very nice for Mr. Bird.

Of course, Mr. Gambini. I think you'll

find your room very comfortable...

but if not, please let me know.

Page, take Mr. Bird to 13.

I forgot your soap. I'm always forgetting...

because the last place I was in,

they didn't give soap.

I see,

- What's the matter?

- How do you mean, "What's the matter"?

Well, why are we whispering?

Oh, I've talked like this for years.

Can't help it.

I was in Birmingham before this...

but I wanted a change.

So did I - and I've got one.

What's your name?

Maggie Craven.

This is the poshest place

I've been in so far.

It's the poshest place

I've been in so far too, Maggie.

That'll do, Maggie, Nineteen's ringing for you,

I bet she is, Never stops,

- I'm Mrs. Poole. I'm the housekeeper here.

- Oh, yes. Nice job?

Well, I don't think

we need discuss that...

but if you've any complaint to make

about your room, please let me know.

I shall be in the linen room

at the end of the corridor. Thank you.

Thank you.

Bird, eh? A General Bird used to shoot

with my father when I was a girl.

He'd an extremely large nose.

Has your Mr. Bird a large nose?

No, Miss Hatfield. Just an ordinary nose.

Oh, probably not the same family.

I remember all these Birds had long noses.

Beaky Birds

we girls used to call them.

Cor, you ought to have seen the labels

on his bags. Ships, airplanes. Hotels all over.

Cairo, India, New York, Los Angeles.

Only give me a tenner though

for taking him up.

That proves he's got plenty of money.

- The richer they are, the less they give you,

'cause they don't care what you think of'em, see?

- Wonder what he is.

- How about secret service?

How about working that lift?

I say. Mrs. Poole.

Yes, Mr. Bird?

Something wrong with your room?

Oh, no. It's very nice, thank you.

It's, um -

It's posh, isn't it? In fact,

it's the poshest you've been in so far.

Please, don't shut that door.

I work here, you know...

and we're not supposed to

shut ourselves in with the guests.

Oh, I wasn't thinking about

anything like that. I -

I just wanted a word with you

in private, if you didn't mind.

I feel, um -

I - I've got to talk to somebody.

Well, why me?

I'm only the housekeeper here.

I shouldn't be in here anyhow.

I'm sorry.

Look. Don't look at me like that.

And look at me as though

you expect me to be sorry for you.

It's the limit.

And if you get any wrong ideas about that,

I'll knock you senseless.

Well, now that you're here, give me a hand

with this, and keep your voice down.

By the way-

before you start, you might like to know

that you're already regarded here...

as a sort of mystery man,

whatever that may mean.

I oughtn't to have come here.

It's not my kind of place.

What about all this traveling

you're supposed to have done?

All the traveling I've done is among Midland

farmers, trying to sell them farm implements.

What's wrong with that?

Why didn't you go on with it?

- Come into some money?

- No.

Never earned more than about

nine pounds a week.

But I'm not married,

and I've saved a few hundred.

Well, you're not spending

your savings here?

But why? Wanted a bit of high life?

In a way, I suppose.

I got into some trouble - uh...

heard some bad news.

I thought I might as well

have a flutter while I had still a chance.

What bad news? What sort of trouble?

Or don't you want to tell me?

- Think I'd better not.

- All right. It's nothing to do with me.

But you needn't think

I'm going to tell anybody about you.

But now that you are here,

don't creep about looking apologetic.

Be a mystery man,

or anything else you want to be.

And tell 'em what you think.

It'll do 'em good.

I could never get Sir Herbert

to touch a tomato.

One of his fads.

- I'll take those.

- Yes, madam.

"Nay, Herbert," I'd say,

"Don't be so silly"...

but it didn't make a bit of difference,

wouldn't touch 'em.

Fancy!

- What did I tell you? You would come here.

- I'm not grumbling, am I, Joe?

As good as. I'm grumbling, all right.

Look at 'em. Look.

About as much life here

as the old fourpenny waxworks,

We ought to have gone

to Brighton like I said.

You and your Brighton.

So I was wondering if he could be

one of the beaky Birds we used to know.

One of the girls -

Emily, I think it was -

went mad and wouldn't

come out of the lumber room.

What? Oh, yes, I am.

You said lumber room.

Very fond of lumber rooms.

Give you all sorts of ideas.

Don't like birds in them though.

That's the man, coming in now.

- Well turned out. Savile Row.

- He looks snooty to me.

Possibly.

Don't like the look of him myself.

If that's the man,

not one of the same Birds.

The family nose couldn't have

dwindled so rapidly.

Perhaps he's had an inch or two removed.

Reminds me of

Sir Herbert's cousin Arthur-

the one that went to Australia.

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