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Last Vegas Page #7
pee your pants.
Well, give it time.
Hey, I didn't know her,
obviously,
but she sounds like
the kind of woman
that wouldn't want you spending
all your time being sad.
- No, she wouldn't.
- So cut it out.
It's enough already.
- Just cut it out?
- Yeah.
Really.
- Can I ask you something?
- Yeah.
If I threw a party,
would you be able to come?
I might.
Might's good enough.
I haven't been this hungover
in 30 years.
Shh-shh-shh.
- Everything's spinning.
- I know.
Oh, no, don't...
Oh, hi.
Guess I'll see you in the morning.
Yeah, and it'll be
great to see you.
That's a good idea.
I mean, I got all my best friends here.
with you too.
Uh. hey, honey?
Let me call you back later, okay?
Yeah.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Excuse me, young lady?
Bloody Mary, please.
Extra bloody.
Sophie wouldn't want me hanging
around the apartment in my bathrobe.
- No, she wou...
- Shut up.
So I'm not gonna do that anymore,
I used to like Bloody Marys.
Maybe I'll like them again.
I'm gonna ask you something.
Do you love this Lisa girl
the way I loved Sophie?
She's a wonderful person,
Well, that's great. I'll vote for her
when she runs for Congress.
Billy, you're gonna
be 70 years old.
Tomorrow you're marrying
a 31-year-old woman
who you proposed to at a funeral.
Now, I don't give
but if I did, I gotta tell you,
I see a few red flags.
Tomorrow I'm gonna ask you again if
you love her. I expect a better answer.
- He left his room.
- Ha, ha.
- Hey.
- Hey.
The old gang.
We're throwing a party tonight.
Yeah, that's the spirit. Yeah, a party.
- Happy day!
- Excuse me.
- Oh, crap.
- I, um...
I just wanted to, uh, apologize
for, uh... For last night.
Uh, I was way out
of line, and, um,
you know, I had too much to drink,
and I am just really, really sorry.
I was just downloading Dean
on who you guys were.
He didn't know that you were
the heads of four very influential
East Coast families.
Yeah, I had... I had no idea.
Well, I wouldn't expect
a d*ckhead like you
to know about
legends like us.
- I... I'm a d*ckhead.
- Knuckles.
Knuckles.
Knuckles, get the guy
out of my sight.
Yeah. You know, you're a dumb
little sh*t, you know that?
- Oh, no, please.
- You don't know who these guys are?
Archie Aces,
Billy Bones,
- Sammy the...
- The accountant.
- Yeah, the accountant.
- Ugh.
Sammy the Stove, they call me.
I cook the books.
I'm just... I'm sorry.
What do we care
about your sorrys?
No, I know, I know, I know.
I don't give a damn about my sorrys.
Just please...
Shut up, shut up.
Just go get us some ice water.
When that's done, you come back,
you do some other things for us.
Maybe Knuckles here
will let you wash his balls.
Sorry, that was weird.
- Four ice waters?
- Go.
- What was that all about?
- I... You were great.
I, uh,
obviously misread you guys.
You guys sold the sh*t out of that.
So, what do you guys want me to do?
Nothing. No, today,
you take the afternoon off,
have another drink, go to the spa.
Save your energy. It's gonna
be a big night for you tonight.
You got some thinking to do.
And we got some recruiting to do.
Yeah. We need to recruit
some talent, gentlemen.
Yeah, I want the A-list.
B... The double-D list.
That is the A-list, actually.
I like this one, although,
is she throwing up or crying?
Definitely throwing up.
By 6.
By 6?
My turn.
Yeah, now we're talking.
Yeah.
- Yeah, that... Yeah.
There you go.
Oh, here, here!
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
Hi. Oh, thanks.
Girls, you remember Sam, right?
Party tonight.
Yeah, thanks. Oh, thanks.
If we were
able to, I would release...
I told you to put those
in one and two.
Okay. Oh, no.
- Take those back. I'm sorry.
- Where to?
Here we go. Let's do it.
Wait, are you...?
So find yourself somebody
You gotta find yourself somebody
You need to find yourself somebody
To love
Wow. You guys just cannot
stay away from me.
You wanna go someplace?
Um, let me just check
with the crowd.
Okay.
When you sing, I feel like a teenager.
And isn't that
your whole goal in life?
- Ha, ha.
- So sad.
You're right.
Can I ask you a personal question?
Ay, ay.
Okay, one personal question.
Why haven't you ever
Well, Why should I?
I get to do everything I want to do
whenever I want to.
I mean, what's wrong with that?
There's no mention of love?
No, no, no, I'm...
I'm not the falling-in-love type.
Okay.
Truth is, there was only one girl
in my entire life
that I fell in love with.
I let her get away.
Who was that?
You shouldn't have used up
your one personal question.
- Oh, you are holding on so tight.
- Ha, ha.
Oh, Mr. Big-Shot,
- Take a seat, please.
- You have got to be kidding.
What's the matter, princess?
Scared of heights?
Yes, the princess
is scared of heights.
Well, I won't think less of you
if you throw up or cry.
Actually, I might if you cry.
Please don't cry.
- I won't cry.
- Billy,
I think I have to ask you
one more personal question.
Whoa!
What?
You're getting married tomorrow.
What are you doing here with me?
Well, you know
- What are you doing here with me?
- Oh, see, I do have an answer.
I... like you.
I liked you from the moment
that I saw you.
None of which matters
if you love Lisa.
Do you?
What's...? No, no. No, no.
Oh, no, no. No!
No! No! No!
I knew you would like it.
Oh, yeah, no, I love it, I love it!
It's great.
Oh, good, because it goes
up and down three more times.
Oh, it... it's... What? Aah!
For a minute there, I thought
you were trying to kill me.
Well, you wouldn't answer
my personal questions,
so I thought I needed to scare
the answers out of you.
All right, well, Paddy and I, right?
When we were kids,
we were in love
with the same girl.
Sophie.
She's the one who got away?
Yeah.
First, you know,
it was just two best friends
competing for the same girl,
but as we got older, it got
a little more complicated.
One day, Paddy told Sophie
that she had to make a choice
between the two of us.
That night,
Sophie came to my house.
You know, she was confused.
She was young.
So she picked you.
Yeah.
Yeah, she came and
saw me first.
But everybody knew
she belonged with Paddy.
Everybody.
So I told her.
And then she went with Paddy.
Does Paddy know?
Oh, complicated.
A little bit.
You know, the boys are throwing
a party for me tonight.
Yeah, I heard.
if you'd stop by.
Complicated.
A little bit.
There they are.
These are my...
- Those are the kids.
- Uh-huh?
And when they were younger.
And here are the grandkids.
Your son's son, and who's...?
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"Last Vegas" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/last_vegas_12297>.
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