Lazer Team Page #4

Synopsis: After thousands of years of thinking we are alone in the universe we decode a message (in the 60s) telling us we are not alone, and that the universe is a dangerous place and that we are going to be attacked. Luckily, the coded message came from a friendly alien race that fathered and protected us over the years. And now they are giving us the tools to fight back (in the form of power armor). But the delivery service takes a long time, and during those loooong decades waiting for that cargo ship to arrive with their one power suit, they choose a champion of earth to train to wear the suit and defend the earth! Then the ship finally arrives... Only to get shot down by 4 morons who play with the suit and ultimately get one piece each stuck to them. Now they need to work with the government to train these 4 morons with individual pieces attached to them. Will they save the day or will they stand around contemplating life?
Genre: Action, Comedy, Sci-Fi
Director(s): Matt Hullum
Production: Rooster Teeth Productions
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
5.6
Metacritic:
42
Rotten Tomatoes:
56%
PG-13
Year:
2015
102 min
$1,149,878
Website
215 Views


Only said...

Mur, why do we have to be here

all night guarding this ship?

This is top secret.

They need the best they have.

In addition, this patrol service...

What the hell was that?

We are going to see, heads of cow.

Franksen, stay here.

do not need any help?

Stay, Frank.

do this well! Care guys.

There are zarigellas and those things.

What the hell?

More things alienigenas...

I will report.

- O...

We looked first if there are appliances like those

found those fools.

Care, Mur.

What is that?

What is that?

What is that?

Quitenmelo above.

Quitenmelo above.

Do boys?

boys.

Are they all ok?

Jesus, I was scared...

Do Adam?

- No.

Adam.

I said that already finished.

I am not going to do so.

Do you could only listen?

We can cut out parts.

Jenkins was wrong, we all know...

Why? He told us that we could.

we have nothing.

The suit should work as a unit.

We separate the parts that

are not so powerful.

You can forget to use...

The ray of dark matter or

any of the other functions.

They will not.

Make sure to do so.

That is their job.

My job is to be the champion of the Earth.

That work was taken by the four

men who are seated in the cell.

Acostumbrate to that.

They will not succeed and then

we will have to have to cut off these parts.

I am sure.

them will not be successful and then

we will have to have to cut off those parts.

Thank You.

Yes, it was a long day. I met some

aliens... I got a laser weapon.

The army took us and now we are

training to save the world.

The only thing I did today was eat Froyo.

Great. I love the Froyo.

When finished with extraterrestrials

who want to destroy the planet,

I go to eat something of Froyo.

's it?

Froyo is in fact delicious.

is my father there?

Does the is well?

Yes, but your arm stinks, so I do not

think that reaches the computer Lazer final.

Listening Zach, perhaps my father is not so

strong, courageous, or intelligent...

but he is very good at...

Eh...

I also love you, heart.

This is as camping, guys.

No one I had invited to camp.

Franksen, shut up.

Only said...

Mur, why do we have to be here

all night guarding this ship?

This is top secret.

They need the best they have.

In addition, this patrol service...

What the hell was that?

We are going to see, heads of cow.

Franksen, stay here.

do not need any help?

Stay, Frank.

do this well! Care guys.

There are zarigellas and those things.

What the hell?

More things alienigenas...

I will report.

- O...

We looked first if there are appliances like those

found those fools.

Care, Mur.

What is that?

What is that?

What is that?

Quitenmelo above.

Quitenmelo above.

Do boys?

boys.

Are they all ok?

Jesus, I was scared...

Do Adam?

- No.

Adam.

I said that already finished.

I am not going to do so.

Do you could only listen?

We can cut out parts.

Jenkins was wrong, we all know...

Why? He told us that we could.

we have nothing.

The suit should work as a unit.

We separate the parts that

are not so powerful.

You can forget to use...

The ray of dark matter or

any of the other functions.

They will not.

Make sure to do so.

That is their job.

My job is to be the champion of the Earth.

That work was taken by the four

men who are seated in the cell.

Acostumbrate to that.

They will not succeed and then

we will have to have to cut off these parts.

I am sure.

them will not be successful and then

we will have to have to cut off those parts.

Thank You.

Todo el mundo duerme, eh?

Los ngeles del Equipo Lazer.

Se ven lindos.

Qu es eso?

Sus nuevos uniformes.

Hechos especialmente por el ejercito,

con microfibra avanzada.

Y no son anti-inflamable.

Por lo que son inflamables.

No son retardantes de fuego.

La mayora de la ropa es inflamable,

Entonces, por qu menciona eso?

Consideralo como la mayora de

la ropa, porque va a quemarse.

Esperan que nos quememos?

Me tengo que ir.

Qu miras?

Abra la puerta.

OK, para la prueba de hoy,

aprendern una funcin ms poderosa

del traje conocida como el

rayo de materia oscura.

Accesible unicamente cuando...

el traje se utiliza al unisono...

Cul es el problema?

Este traje se cuela en mi perineo.

La mitad de l est dentro de m.

Parece que estoy usando un mameluco.

Acostumbrense a usarlo.

O piensan que son un

equipo de superheroes?

Escuadrn Lazer?

- Es Equipo Lazer.

Y por qu somos el equipo Lazer?

- Porque yo tengo un lser.

S, pero el resto de nosotros no.

- Uds. son parte del equipo.

Al diablo, somos el "Grupo Tetas".

Qu les parece "el muchacho

del casco y sus amigos"?

No, yo deberia ser "el escudo maravilloso".

La palabra escudo es un acrnimo...

Eso es muy chafa.

Eso eres tu.

Porque no sugieres algo mejor?

Ya lo hice:
Equipo Lazer.

A nadie le importan sus estpidos nombres.

Podemos centrarnos en lo que estamos

aqu, que es salvar el planeta?

Bueno, la cosa mas importante a recordar,

es que cuando la primera ola venga...

Zachary, no respondas,

Te estoy hablando telepticamente.

En serio? Eso es grandioso.

- Cllate y escucha.

Durante la primera ola...

Mantengan la calma.

Estoy hablando con todos ustedes.

Esto es raro.

Las habilidades de mi

casco siguen creciendo

conforme me ajusto,

pero esto es nuevo.

Hice este lugar,

para que podamos hablar mentalmente.

No s por cunto tiempo pueda hacerlo,

pero debo decirles algo.

Asi que todos, concentrense.

S, concentrense.

Nadie piense en algo raro.

Ests pensando en algo raro?

No.

- Si ests, podemos ver lo que piensas.

Ahora ustedes tambin lo hacen.

Tu haces que lo piense.

No puedo dejar de pensar en eso tampoco.

Chicos, escuch una conversacin.

Adam quiere sabotearnos.

Quiere las piezas para l.

Si no pasamos la prueba hoy,

nos cortaran las piezas.

As que pongan atencin.

Tengo que dejar de pensar en esto.

Voy a pensar en otra cosa... Lo tengo.

Lo tienes...

Hola, pap.

and therefore perhaps

the ray of dark matter

is the only

strong enough to defeat the Worg.

We are going to try to do so.

Remember what I said,

and should be well.

Ready?

Start.

You dirty, son of a b*tch!

Llevenlos back to their cells.

Why I do this?

This weapon has helped us enormously.

Do not worry, we will be well.

Right? According to Woody,

we are literally on the Tagus.

I would not be surprised if someone enters

at any time and leads us.

Do not be stupid, they need us.

In no way...

How are you... the

champions of the Earth?

Yes?

We are the closest that you can find.

Good. It is time for your...

physical examination.

What decias?

Security Control

All visitors must register.

Well, patient number 1, here.

Do not worry, Woody, everything will be alright.

Patient number 2, by there.

patients 3 and 4 by aca please.

- do here?

Do We together?

I am not going to go there.

Hey, man. Hey.

Are you a good doctor or any doctor crazy?

You are a bad one.

They told us that it was only a physical examination.

Do we need these belts or if?

is for your own safety.

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Burnie Burns

Michael Justin "Burnie" Burns (born January 18, 1973) is an American writer, actor, producer, comedian, host, and director living in Austin, Texas. He is a co-founder, former chief executive officer, and current chief creative officer of Rooster Teeth. He is noted for his contributions in machinima, a form of film-making that uses video game technology in its production, and also works with animation and live action. Burns is also known for his work in the hosting and podcasting field. In April 2003, Burns, along with several friends and co-workers, created the machinima series Red vs. Blue: The Blood Gulch Chronicles. Filmed using the video game Halo, Red vs. Blue was acclaimed for its humor and originality, making Burns an Internet celebrity. His success allowed him to co-found the production company Rooster Teeth. After the immediate popularity of Red vs. Blue, Burns attracted the attention of video game company Electronic Arts, who asked him to create a promotional series using their upcoming game, The Sims 2. The result was The Strangerhood. Burns also premiered P.A.N.I.C.S., a mini-series that utilizes the F.E.A.R. game engine. In 2016, Burns starred in the science fiction comedy film Lazer Team, which he co-wrote. As one of the innovators in the field of machinima, he has made guest appearances at the Penny Arcade Expo, San Diego Comic-Con International, Sundance and The Sydney Film Festival. For his work on Immersion (2010), a live action series that tests video game tropes in the real world, and The Gauntlet (2013), Rooster Teeth's reality game show, he has been nominated for two IAWTV awards in the "Best Host of a Web Series (Pre-Recorded)" category. He was named one of the "Top 25 Digital Stars" by The Hollywood Reporter in 2015. Alongside longtime-business partner Matt Hullum, he was named one of Variety's top Digital Entertainment Execs to Watch in 2018. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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