Lazer Team Page #5

Synopsis: After thousands of years of thinking we are alone in the universe we decode a message (in the 60s) telling us we are not alone, and that the universe is a dangerous place and that we are going to be attacked. Luckily, the coded message came from a friendly alien race that fathered and protected us over the years. And now they are giving us the tools to fight back (in the form of power armor). But the delivery service takes a long time, and during those loooong decades waiting for that cargo ship to arrive with their one power suit, they choose a champion of earth to train to wear the suit and defend the earth! Then the ship finally arrives... Only to get shot down by 4 morons who play with the suit and ultimately get one piece each stuck to them. Now they need to work with the government to train these 4 morons with individual pieces attached to them. Will they save the day or will they stand around contemplating life?
Genre: Action, Comedy, Sci-Fi
Director(s): Matt Hullum
Production: Rooster Teeth Productions
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
5.6
Metacritic:
42
Rotten Tomatoes:
56%
PG-13
Year:
2015
102 min
$1,149,878
Website
215 Views


That did not make me feel very secure.

Do You Do?

- What?

Can I say something?

I want you to know that you will always I hated.

You have always been what more I hated.

Now not, Herman.

is all your fault. If you had left

695 Hos

alone to Woody and my,

this would not have happened.

But no, tapeworms that pressuring

to have a space adventure.

And now I cut the legs

and I will be even smaller.

You're an idiot.

Herman, just to

keep the head up.

I am sorry.

- I saw everything. It was in self-defense.

I never thought I would say this,

but I well done, do!

!We Go!

Sueltame!!

Don't move.

- You do not need that. Only destame.

No, there is no time.

- No, stop...

I need a new bata.

- No, not worry, Jack.

Vistete, we are going to seek to Woody.

- and the boy.

is not very far from us.

Quito the top

, and what creerias?

She had a tattoo of

Adolf Hitler in its teta

left and one of Joseph

Stalin in the right.

Dr. Marquee to the psychiatric ward.

special clothing required

from this point

You volar the head.

Boy, are you free?

If I used the laser for

my wives.

where is the nurse?

do and that dust?

- nobody.

is say, nothing.

This is not going to work.

- more slowly.

I am pushing.

I only have a hand.

I also have only one hand

Your other hand is

inside a great hand.

What is this?

This is one of those

types of space suits.

We were going to cut the fat,

when it became "poop" above and collapsed

would be ashamed of me same

If asi of Gordo and

covered with grease and of sh*t.

is disgusting.

Can take a look if you like,

If is that support the

caca and body fat.

I step, muevanse.

Are you sure?

- Yes, leave.

If you want to swim there,

could need a snorkel.

This well. Muevanse. Leave.

Thank you, guys. Good job.

- God Bless America.

What is wrong with "Group tit"?

- closes the mouth.

Do not worry, not will hurt anything.

- Mode enabled invisibility

Woody, arise...

Oh my God,, stripped of his head!

- Hey guys.

!kill him. Matalo!

Oh my God, I removed my arm.

Why I had not realized?

boys, calm, all is well.

The Invisible Mode

is not effective whole

If is divided. Do all are well?

I feel good.

- HYPERACTIVITY DISORDER

I am 100%

- DROP AND DAMAGE IN LIVER.

Yes, all well.

- ED AND LUMBAR INJURY

Thank You. I also feel good.

- LEVELS OF EXTREMELY HIGH ESTROGENO

is well, guys, in a hurry.

We have to find out where we are going...

Now what?

- Do not worry, I know the way.

This is the fastest output.

multiplied by three.

- Woody...

Do you could hack the central computer?

- The devil, I am going to fly.

Zach, do not do it

good job, Chico.

Flew everything except the damn door.

What the hell is made this door?

where do they believe they go?

Give me my suit.

You can have it, nobody wants it.

It boots, do something!

Okay?, We are going to...

are only wasting time.

NOT weakness detected.

- Is a process of growth.

The balls.

Do you want to give me a hand?

Thank You.

- all together.

How did that?

I did not know that they could

do that with the shield.

I think that we now work together.

- Team Work.

You are not a team.

You are a joke.

Do you idiots think really

that can save the planet?

The only champion in this planet i am.

This is what you get if you get

with the computer Lazer, idiot.

good job, Zach. Okay?

We are going to...

is well. We are going.

Zach.

Encuentrenlos.

attention, all soldiers:

The Perseus Project has escaped, I repeat:

Equipment Lazer is active and is

considered armed and dangerous.

sh*t, are everywhere.

We shall never take.

speaks for you.

What perhaps Woody is not

as McGyer now?

Just builds a hovercraft

with paper clips or something like that.

does anyone still where we leave the cradle?

And Jack told the baby: "What?

I could not sleep...

but i won. "

You know these four idiots in

Internet self-called "the team Lazer".

are on Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat.

And I know that thou art, Jimmy Kimmel.

Salt and stop the game.

I am not crazy. I avergenzas

not once but twice...

Do You Mindy Do?

We would like to make some questions.

Well, we can take refuge here,

but do not touch anything.

is the house of my ex and if they break something

I do not want to pay again for everything.

is like the corridor of the mania here.

- What is your ex or your grandmother?

She said that has classic taste.

Do This is the mother of Mindy, truth?

is beautiful. I see where you removed.

leave it there.

Now!

guys, if this countdown is certain,

the Worg will be here in two days.

correct, we just

stayed here and we hope

until everything is finished.

Do it all ends?

That is not what we are doing.

No?

- No.

statistically,

the best option for the planet

was to allow the military amputaran us.

something that I do not agree, given my

0 % chance to survive.

Well, not zero at all. Zero means to

have no chance of survival...

but there is always a small

chance that i...

Woody.

- Sorry.

Dejemoslo handle it the government.

That is why we voted for him.

You do not vote Herman.

- is figuratively, Woody.

guys, we take the costume of power.

We have a moral obligation to do something.

I don't des sermons. If we are

in this predicament is by your fault.

Zachary, is it you?

- Yes. F***, Mindy, you look very well.

How is that of a cheetah?

- is of terrestrial leopard. Thanks.

Do you are still in possession of the

glove particle accelerator?

Do the laser?

Oh yes. Do you like, Baby?

I find it very beautiful.

What is your location, so that

we meet and aparearnos?

seriously?

Absolutely.

It is important to do this...

But we must first find.

We stayed in the old

cabin of your mother.

Should be there soon.

I am very excited and I am

very fertile when it arrives.

Oh, yes.

I love this thing!

to all units:

The project of Perseus

this loose and are considered

armed and dangerous...

So be careful.

Maintain the head there and... Sh*t!

My boss is here.

The call again, guys.

General stall you would not expect it.

Emory, we appreciate your dedication

to this project,

but we are going to continue with

the contingency plan.

General, I appreciate that, but I am fully

confidence that we can

put this under control.

I feel that once the computer Lazer...

How was that called them?

I am referring to the prisoners.

Once they are detainees...

enough.

Mr... Bill, first we have to

try to combat the aliens...

Before launching a nuclear weapon that

will kill millions of people.

Prepare the core.

We have a planet to save and,

more importantly, a nation.

What is your problem?

- Who? Herman?

Yes, he has the Idiot Do

as the worst thing that has happened...

but were very good friends.

Mira.

Herman never speaks

of it. Is complicated.

do complicated?

Do As "gay"?

- No. Why asumiste that was gay?

A rupture. It looks like a rupture gay.

What is a rupture gay?

was a rupture in the ordinary way.

whatever.

I am going to find out what happens.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes

Burnie Burns

Michael Justin "Burnie" Burns (born January 18, 1973) is an American writer, actor, producer, comedian, host, and director living in Austin, Texas. He is a co-founder, former chief executive officer, and current chief creative officer of Rooster Teeth. He is noted for his contributions in machinima, a form of film-making that uses video game technology in its production, and also works with animation and live action. Burns is also known for his work in the hosting and podcasting field. In April 2003, Burns, along with several friends and co-workers, created the machinima series Red vs. Blue: The Blood Gulch Chronicles. Filmed using the video game Halo, Red vs. Blue was acclaimed for its humor and originality, making Burns an Internet celebrity. His success allowed him to co-found the production company Rooster Teeth. After the immediate popularity of Red vs. Blue, Burns attracted the attention of video game company Electronic Arts, who asked him to create a promotional series using their upcoming game, The Sims 2. The result was The Strangerhood. Burns also premiered P.A.N.I.C.S., a mini-series that utilizes the F.E.A.R. game engine. In 2016, Burns starred in the science fiction comedy film Lazer Team, which he co-wrote. As one of the innovators in the field of machinima, he has made guest appearances at the Penny Arcade Expo, San Diego Comic-Con International, Sundance and The Sydney Film Festival. For his work on Immersion (2010), a live action series that tests video game tropes in the real world, and The Gauntlet (2013), Rooster Teeth's reality game show, he has been nominated for two IAWTV awards in the "Best Host of a Web Series (Pre-Recorded)" category. He was named one of the "Top 25 Digital Stars" by The Hollywood Reporter in 2015. Alongside longtime-business partner Matt Hullum, he was named one of Variety's top Digital Entertainment Execs to Watch in 2018. more…

All Burnie Burns scripts | Burnie Burns Scripts

0 fans

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:

0 Comments

    Translation

    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)

    Citation

    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:

    Style:MLAChicagoAPA

    "Lazer Team" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 8 Jul 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/lazer_team_12337>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    Lazer Team

    Browse Scripts.com

    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.


    Quiz

    Are you a screenwriting master?

    »
    What does the term "plant and payoff" refer to in screenwriting?
    A Setting up the final scene
    B The payment to writers for their scripts
    C The introduction of main characters
    D Introducing a plot element early that becomes important later