Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde Page #4

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It's called the Committee

of Energy and Commerce.

Oh, yeah. Right. Thanks.

This is really

important to me, Grace.

They wouldn't cover

my nana's anti-itch cream...

which means she only has

one free hand for bingo.

- Lf I could get a hearing--

- Where's your bill, Reena?

The staff lawyers couldn't

draft it for six weeks...

but if you could talk to

the congressman's aide...

I could get on the agenda.

We pushed

prescription drugs last term.

I have a lot of issues

that come first.

Reena, if Grace finds herself

otherwise prioritized...

maybe you could talk

to this aide yourself.

Or better yet,

directly to the congressman.

Don't you have something

to alphabetize?

In fact,

now that I think about it...

with Reena's clear passion

for the project...

who better to

write this bill than Reena?

Me?

It's like I always say--

Why let someone else do for you

what you can do for yourself?

Except in the case

of eyebrow maintenance.

We always say follow protocol.

It's worked

for the past 200 years...

OK, Miss Snap Cup?

Stick it out with the lawyers.

They'll get to you eventually.

This is the new

congressmember roster.

Just a dollar.

Don't you believe

in helping a guy out?

What I do believe in, sir...

is an honest day's work

for an honest day's pay.

Not rewards for idleness.

- 50 cents?

- Leave me!

- Just a quarter.

- Go bother someone else!

People here

have no common courtesy.

Want to get a hearing

for your bill?

Get Congresswoman Hauser.

She needs a political makeover.

Sidney?

Who needs a what?

Hauser.

Tough redhead on En and Comm.

If she can put her name

on something warm and fuzzy...

something like puppies,

that could do the trick.

Really? What if I showed

Hauser the photos...

of what they're doing

to these animals?

That'd work...

with someone with a heart.

Hauser responds to facts,

figures, and demographics.

You gotta do your homework.

How did you learn all this?

I have been stationed

on the forefront...

of all major political

and social scandals...

for the past 30 years.

You worked in the White House?

No, at the Wellington.

After Hauser,

you'll need Stanford Marks...

Alabama Republican.

A real hard-ass.

Sidney, you are,

without a doubt...

the most useful person

I've met in Washington.

Hauser's margin

in the last election?

Four points. 52-48.

Hauser's chief?

Hall, Ted.

- Marks' aide?

- Murphy. Conservative, tougher.

- I think you're ready.

- Thank you, Sid.

For shizzle... my ezzle.

I borrowed this.

Excuse me!

Given the historical

tendencies...

of the congresswoman's

voting pool...

animal testing is the very issue

your platform needs.

Which brings me to my

demographic breakdown target.

Which brings us to the end

of our time, but good stuff.

I'll bat it around

with my colleagues.

I'm not done

with my presentation.

- Is Friday good?

- Absolutely.

The second one in November,

and the line starts down there.

But wait!

I won't be here in November.

I'm getting married.

If you insist Congressman Marks

is unavailable...

perhaps you could look at...

my alternative testing

economics incentive chart.

But it's pop-up.

I will read this homeowners

legislation this weekend.

Five more minutes and

I'm due in committee. Reena.

Well--

Reena's prescription drugs

for the elderly amendment--

rejected during mark-up session.

Sorry, Nana.

- Where are we with the animals?

- Still not on the calendar.

So we're nowhere.

Grace, help Elle with this.

Let's get going.

I'll see you all later.

Grace...

I think I can get a meeting

with Hauser's aide.

Please.

You could have 100 meetings...

and it still wouldn't matter.

This is Washington politics...

not warm fuzzies

and kissing booths.

It takes savvy

and street smarts.

I've seen thousands of

polite, idealistic girls...

just like you traipse

up and down this Hill...

and go home empty-handed

with blisters on their feet.

Thank you, Grace.

You actually reminded me

of something really important.

I came here

to give my dog a voice...

and I'd forgotten about my own.

So you can do it

the Washington way.

But I'm going to do it

the Elle Woods way.

Time to get serious.

Time to get serious.

Subject--Congresswoman

Libby Hauser.

Came of age in Post-War boom...

typified by 1951

Charles Jourdan stiletto heel.

Moving up to the Texan's head,

which is red...

suspect chemical assistance.

Must pursue.

Hit me, Post.

a 10-mile radius...

broken down

by color expertise...

and philosophical approach

to hair maintenance and style.

I didn't know you could have

a philosophy of hair.

Oh, yeah.

Maybe that's where I went wrong.

Go for Woods.

It's just as you suspected.

She's at a moderate

conservative salon...

founded on

the principles of Vidal.

In fact, it was one

of our case studies...

last year at Hair University.

That was right

before they flunked me.

Paulette, they weren't ready

for your vision.

I know you'll make

your mark hair-wise.

Sorry.

- You got a pen?

- Yes.

It's at Constitution and 12th.

The Salon Bontempo.

Don't you just love a salon day?

Yes, so peaceful and quiet.

Makes it so much easier

to talk that way.

They have rules about that here.

I know. That's why

I called to make sure...

they used PETA-approved

hair care products.

When you think about what

they do to those animals--

Which is why

I don't think about it.

Does the trick.

Excellent bobby pin handling.

Thank you, Frederic.

Looks great.

Isn't it

so comforting to see...

they use eco-friendly

foil technology here?

Every planet needs a friend,

that's what I always say.

If I wanted to talk about

the emotional life of a rock...

you'd know it by now.

Until this day,

I'd held the highest opinion...

of redheads as a fellow

hair minority group.

I heard quite enough

of your politics...

at the committee meeting,

thank you very much.

When was the last time you wore

the yellow tea rose?

I'm sorry?

What did you just--

When was the last time

you wore your yellow tea rose?

On the night of my initiation.

Wasn't the passing of the secret

scented eternal flame...

of the goddess Delta Nu

not the most moving experience?

Especially the part

where we sipped...

from the secret

pink chalice of sisterhood!

Yes!

Delta who?

Delta Nu!

Delta-Delta boo-gah-loo

Nu Nu Delta

Theta, Beta

Lambda, Mu

Ooh-aah, Delta Nu!

Libby Hauser, Texas.

Planning a wedding?

That "I do" updo

looks like heaven on you.

Thank you.

Who is he?

Zeta Lambda Nu, I hope.

Actually, I'm marrying

outside the Greek system...

but he's totally letter-worthy.

But how is D.C. Elle-worthy?

I'm here to speak for those

who can't speak for themselves.

How interesting.

It's more than interesting.

It's practical.

Strictly a numbers game

as far as you're concerned.

your district with dog licenses.

unemployed scientists...

with the skills to develop

alternatives to animal testing.

And finally, 6285--the ID number

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