Little Fockers Page #10

last night.

Who's that?

That is...

Dad, that's Andi Garcia.

Oh.

She's a work

colleague of mine.

Oh, hi, Dad!

Yeah. She took

a few too many

prescription pills

and then she

pushed me in the pit.

Total party foul.

My bad on that one.

Garcia? Is that Spanish?

Okay, we got to go.

Yeah. My grandparents

are from Seville.

Are you kidding?

I was just in Seville,

mastering the flamenco!

No way!

Dad.

What? But I got to

show her a few moves.

Her grandparents

are from Seville.

Dad, no, no!

Dad, I got to go!

Okay.

Your dad's really good.

The faster you go indicates

an increase in sexual prowess.

Andi, good luck.

It's a good thing

you pulled me away.

I was starting to get a semi.

Oh, Dad, please.

It's involuntary.

It's the parasympathetic

nervous system.

Flamenco's very sexual.

Well, just so you know,

nothing happened with her.

I know that. We're Fockers.

That's not the way we roll.

But I know

something went down

with the family. You okay?

Yeah, just the usual

Jack stuff. You okay?

Your mom was right.

Man-opause. Makes me

act like a lunatic.

You know,

I get a little nutty.

Grandma Roz! Grandma Roz!

My God.

There she is!

My little scrunchie-munchie.

Let me look at you, baby.

Oh, you look so cute.

Do you mind if we

sit down, honey?

Have a little chat.

'Cause Grandma's feet hurt.

So, I hear

you're not speaking

to your father.

Is that true?

Well, let me

tell you something

about men, Samantha.

They... They...

They're told to be

tough and hard, you know?

But inside,

they're quite

soft and gooey.

Kind of like a cannoli.

A knish?

It's not exactly that.

It's more like

peanut butter and jelly

inside burnt toast.

And once you know that,

you can cut them

a little slack.

Besides, you'll have

plenty of time

to aggravate him

in your teens.

Grandma!

Hi, honey!

Look at you,

how big you got!

Hi, sweetheart.

Come here and give me

a Focker sandwich.

Okay, I'm the cheese.

We're cheese!

I'm the cheese.

No, I'm the cheese

and you're the bread.

We're sourdough.

Attention! Attention!

Henry and Samantha!

Today you are five!

This way.

Okay, thank you.

Dad.

Yeah.

You coming?

Yeah. I just want

to practice the dance

I'm gonna surprise

your mother with.

Go ahead.

Okay. I'll see you

down there.

Gay?

My two cents.

The way to deal with Jack,

no matter what he does,

just smother

that guy with kisses.

He'll be putty

in your hands.

Good.

Love, love, love.

Good, putty, thank you.

Oh, Gay.

Yes.

You look good.

Thank you.

All right.

Can you do me a favor?

Okay.

Can you just put

this leg down slowly?

It's an old sex injury.

Like this?

Yeah.

Oh, my gosh.

This performance

is my gift to you!

You are the chosen ones!

Pam.

Pam!

Greg.

I pronounce

this your day!

Oh, what happened to you?

Oh, it's... I...

I'll tell you

about it later, okay?

Look, I'm really sorry

about what happened.

I just...

I'm sorry, too.

I let everything

get out of control

and I shouldn't have.

It's just...

It's just your dad.

You know, I...

I know. He's insane.

Yes. Yes.

Listen to me.

We've got our

own thing and it works.

It does, right?

Yeah, we actually

kind of know

what we're doing.

I love you.

I love you.

Hey, Sam! Happy birthday.

Look, I know

you don't want

to talk to me.

I just want you

to know that's okay.

I love you anyway.

I know, Daddy.

Dad!

There he is!

Hey, happy birthday, man!

Hey, look,

I think you left

something at home.

Arthur!

Yeah.

Thanks, Dad.

It's so beautiful.

Oh, my God.

Oh, gosh.

I'm all right.

Gustavo!

Birthday cake! Birthday cake!

Try the birthday cake.

There's 36 different kinds!

Kevin?

Rosalind.

What a mitzvah that

you could make it

to the party.

What's wrong, honey?

I wish I knew.

Come. Sit down.

Look over this way

a little bit.

And a little up. Up.

Hey, Jack.

Wow, that's great.

That's a great likeness.

That's really...

It really captured

the intensity

and looks just like you.

All right.

So, look, last night,

I think we both said

some things we regret.

Maybe I shouldn't

have said anything

about Dr. Bob.

But then you did that

whole course-correction

thing. So...

Anyway,

"peace" of cake offering.

What the hell?

Oh, sh*t.

Jack, you all right?

Jack, I'm sorry.

Jack, you okay?

Okay, Focker.

At least you're going to

make this a little fun.

Jack. Let's not do this.

Come on.

We've had this date

since the beginning, Greg.

All right. Let's dance.

Come on, man.

Jack?

Where are you? Jack!

Jack?

Get out of the ball pit!

Get out of the ball pit!

Get out!

Let's go.

Get out!

Get out of the ball pit!

Get out!

Jack?

I saw you last night

with Andi Garcia!

Nothing happened!

I've been in the wild

for so long,

that maybe

it's time to come home.

But then where is home?

Honey, home is

inside of you.

What you have been

seeking out there

is right in here.

In your heart?

No, in your heart.

In my heart.

Yes, yes, Kevin.

Suck it!

Arthur? Arthur?

Mom! Arthur's missing!

Jack! Nothing happened.

What'd you say?

Jack, nothing happened.

I'm telling you the truth.

Oh, sh*t.

Jinxy! Jinxy!

Bad cat! Bad cat!

Jinx! Bad cat!

Jinx!

Jinx! Jinx!

Oh, sh*t.

Kevin, you are

a lovely young man

with a number of unusual

fixations and hobbies.

Thank you.

I know you're

going to find your way.

Trust me, honey.

Because you have

the strength of a lion

and the soul of a poet.

Roz?

Bernie?

What are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

The guy has

issues, honey.

Bernard, I swear this isn't

what it looks like.

Your wife was comforting me

in a moment of distress

and my soul just

reached out to her.

Your soul or your tongue?

No. There was

no tongue involved.

There was a little.

Thank you for your honesty.

I thought you were

in Spain, honey.

What happened?

What happened?

I went halfway around

the world to master

the flamenco,

but there was

one thing missing,

my dance partner.

Oh, Bernie.

You're my true north.

I know as long

as we're together,

I'll never get lost.

Oh, what a beautiful line.

Come here, baby.

That's beautiful.

So raw, this electricity...

Will you get out of here

so I can shtup my wife?

Shtup her? Yeah, sure.

Jinx!

Grandpa! Grandpa!

What's wrong?

Jack?

Jack. Jack.

Jack.

Honey. Greg, do something.

Okay. Having some

chest pain?

Yeah.

All right. Just relax.

I'm gonna check you out.

What's wrong with Grandpa?

He's gonna

be fine, honey.

Okay, I'm here. Okay.

Jack, you have your

nitro tabs with you?

Greg, he's not responding

to my treatment.

Really? To you waving

your hands over him?

He's not a Ouija board, Kevin.

Pam? Call 911.

Okay.

Kevin,

can you go up to the house,

see if you have some aspirin?

Aspirin.

It's all right.

Jinx!

Arthur!

Wow.

Thanks, Dad.

Just relax, Jack.

It's going to be okay.

Breathe, breathe.

I promise.

Is he taking

any other medications?

Just the 324

milligrams of aspirin

I gave him about

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes