Little Giants Page #7

One time, at a Spring Carnival...

...I beat both my brothers

in the cow-dung toss.

You beat Matt and Brad in the turd toss?

One time, I went fishing

with my entire family.

I was the only one that didn't throw up.

So what?

That doesn't make us good football players.

Wait a second, guys. Who said

you had to be good to play football?

You play football because you want to.

You play because it's fun.

You play so you can pretend

you're Joe Montana...

...throwing a touchdown pass

or Emmitt Smith going for a long run.

And even if those Cowboys are better

than you guys...

...even if they beat you 99 times

out of 100...

...that still leaves...

- One time.

- One time.

- Yeah. One time.

- Stop! Who are we?

- Giants!

- I just told the mayor you forfeited.

- You give the mayor a message for me.

Tell him not to bet on the Cowboys.

- You forget one thing.

- What?

- That's my field.

- Yeah, well, we got the ball.

Come on. All right.

Okay, guys. All right. Here we go.

- Go, Spike.

- All right. Let's hit somebody.

Break!

They're gonna have to put you in a body bag.

- Prepare to eat grass.

- Pig breath, you're in big trouble.

- How come?

- Football's 80%% mental and 40%% physical.

- Set. Go!

- What?

Hey, guys, look!

- Second and nine.

- They gained a yard!

We got one yard.

One yard.

Don't mean nothing.

Down!

Set! Go!

Flea-flicker to Floyd. He's got

room up the sideline, the 45, the 50.

First down, Giants, on their longest gain

of the afternoon.

What kind of defense is that? Come on.

All right. Great. Great stuff.

Giants, Giants, first and 10

Giants, Giants

Okay, listen up. What would be the last thing

they'd expect us to do?

- A reverse to me?

- Down!

Set! Go!

I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die.

- Come on, Tad!

- I'm gonna die!

Tad! Go! Go! Run out of bounds!

Tad! Run!

Go! Go!

We scored! We scored a touchdown!

Touchdown, Giants!

Oh, my God! My son scored a touchdown.

Down. Set. Go!

Yes. I've done it.

All right, Spike.

We're not taking any chances.

Either take Junior Floyd out of the game

or you donate a kidney to Aunt Ruth.

- Yes, sir!

- Okay. Come on. Get going.

- Personal foul, number 32, white.

- Are you crazy? What kind of call is that?

Hey. That wasn't very nice, you big bully.

If that kid of yours pulls another stunt

like that, you're both out of here.

- Hey, I thought you wanted to win.

- Not like that.

- Hi.

- Sure you want to do this, Becky?

- Call me Icebox.

- Hey, Icebox.

Kick some butt.

Call me Becky.

- What's that cheerleader doing?

- It's no cheerleader. That's my niece.

And she's pissed.

Break!

Keep clear, Ice Chest,

or I'll have to mess up your face.

Two, fifty-six. Two, fifty-six.

Two, fifty-six. Down!

Set! Go!

What a hit by Becky O'Shea.

The ball is loose. Hanon tightly covers it up.

Yes! All right! That's my girl!

Yeah.

No!

- Let it go, man.

- Get away.

I got it! I got it! I got it!

Zolteck! Come here.

- You rang?

- Chicken little flea-flicker on two. Take it.

- Okay. Chicken little flea-flicker on two.

- What's that?

It's a pitch to Johnny.

Pitch to Johnny?

You can't pitch to Johnny. I'm Johnny!

Zolteck, he's gonna need some running room.

Got you.

- Break!

- Excuse me, guys! Guys, come on!

Excuse me. Maybe you can help me.

I'm trying to remember what I had for lunch.

- How can we do that?

- By taking a whiff of this.

Hut. Hut two.

- Now what?

- Just run to him.

Dad?

Dad!

Dad!

Dad!

Dad!

Dad!

Touchdown! The Giants deficit

is cut in half...

...on brilliant running by Johnny Vennaro.

- Line up. Let's go. Get the guys over here.

- We're out there. Let's go to kick off.

Down!

Set! Go!

- Clear it out. Let's go.

- All right, guys. Way to go.

What's the matter, four-eyes?

Want your mama?

Don't be talking about my mama.

Watching Jake play football

has really been great for my family.

Yeah.

Down. Set. Go!

Rip their filthy ears off, Jakester!

Yes! Yes!

- I use these for acid indigestion.

- So what are we gonna use these for?

Intimidation.

Break!

Go.

What's the matter with you?

You gonna play or what?

Okay. I've got the play.

Silver streak to Hanon on two.

Are you sure?

- Ready.

- Break!

- Oh, crud.

- Come on.

Set! Go!

Pass! Pass! Pass!

Yeah! That's my boy!

All right, Hanon!

Touchdown!

- Wrong defense!

- I didn't call the blitz!

With 1:
45 left and the score tied

21 to 21...

...it looks like Mr. Momentum

may be changing his address.

All right, men. Let's go.

Down!

Set!

Go!

- Get off of me.

- You're mine.

All right. All right.

With less than a minute to play, the

Cowboys are heading for that end zone.

Set! Go!

Stick a fork in them. They're done!

Easy! Easy! One more!

Come here, son.

Thirty-eight toss. You understand?

Thirty-eight toss. Let's go.

Do you remember that

championship game with Sutterville?

The one where Kevin scored

the winning touchdown?

Time-out.

The Giants call a time-out with 10 seconds

left and the ball on the one-yard line.

Come on, guys. Huddle up.

Look, no one thought

we'd make it this far.

But now it's time to really dig in.

They're gonna give the ball to Spike.

- We've gotta stop him.

- He's too strong.

We can do it together.

- Ready.

- Break!

Hold that line! Hold that line!

Hold that line!

Set!

They know the play.

They know the play.

Set!

Go!

Turn it up!

- Yes! We're in! Touchdown!

- Yeah!

- It was over!

- No. We stopped him.

- He was in.

- No way.

Move it back. Everybody, off the ball.

Move back.

Giants' ball!

No! No!

Giants' ball!

Told you.

Time-out.

You did it, guys. You stopped him.

I'm real proud of you.

- Coach, there's still four seconds left.

- We can beat these guys.

Put me in, coach!

I wanna kick some butt!

What kind of play you got for this?

How about the annexation of Puerto Rico?

With four seconds left, the Giants

trot onto the field for the final play.

- Ready.

- One time.

- Ready.

- Break!

You're mine, pom-pom.

- All right.

- Let's go, baby. One more play, baby.

Watch the wingman.

Down!

- Don't let anybody behind you!

- Set!

Go!

Reverse! Reverse!

She doesn't have the ball.

Fumblerooski! Fumblerooski!

- Yeah! No mercy!

- No ball.

- Get him!

- He's got the ball!

I got it. I got it.

Come on! Come on!

I'm gonna score a touchdown.

I'm gonna score a touchdown!

No, you're not.

Yeah!

- We won!

- We won!

We did it! We won!

- We won! We won! We won!

- We did it!

We won!

We won! We won!

We won!

Patty Floyd...

...I was wondering if you'd be interested

in having dinner with me?

Fine, if you'd like to think about it.

Get a grip, Dad.

Yeah! Oh, yeah!

Yes!

Giants! Giants! Giants! Giants!

Congratulations, Danny.

Looks like you're the new head coach.

If you're pissed at me, don't be.

If I wasn't tough on you...

...when we were kids,

you never would've beat me today.

- Okay. Listen, Kev, my guys are wondering...

- They want to tar and feather me in public?

No. They're wondering if your team

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