Lost and Found Page #4

---

and famous and...

I get it.

Keep goin'.

He thinks I'm just going to

forget about how he treated me.

Unhh!

The things I hated

the most were his lies.

Without honesty,

you have nothing. You agree?

Yeah.

Uh, honesty is

very important.

Ice cream!

Now, that's...

Really important.

All right.

I tell you what.

You've had

a long day.

Uh...Why don't you

go inside,

take a bath, relax,

light some candles.

I'll get out there

and do a final pass

of the neighborhood. Ok?

You would do that?

Sure. Yeah, no problem.

And I'll see you later.

I mean, if I find him.

Dylan?

Yeah.

I'm very lucky to have

a neighbor like you.

Yeah.

[Door closes]

Oop. God.

Ooh, burn on me.

You got out

of the bathroom door.

You want to call

letterman, or should I?

[Imitating letterman]

This dog has a gift.

[Autodialing]

[Ring]

Hey. Wally, it's Dylan.

Yeah. Can you get

lasagna and salad for two

delivered to my house stat?

And make it nice.

Thanks, pal.

You don't need

my credit card.

I own the place.

Remember?

All right.

You're doin' good.

Well, well, well.

It's time to take you

home, buddy,

and earn

my hero stripes.

Yeah!

[Whimpers]

You did not.

Where's the ring, Jack?

I need to have it.

Look at me,

you little tarantula.

I know you know

where it is.

Do the right thing,

and point your snout at it.

Talk to me.

[Knock knock]

Who is it?

Wally.

Oh...My...God.

Oh, no.

It's single

white female.

So, let me get

this right, boss.

You lost mark's ring,

and then you stole

some broad's dog

to help you

find the ring,

and then the dog

lost the...

Oh, wait.

Let me start over.

Just look.

You want some flowers

for that vase?

Huh?

Hey. Don't give him

any of that.

He doesn't get anything

till we get the ring back.

Heh heh. This dog'll

eat anything.

Hey, there's

my mail key.

[Grrr]

It's difficult to tell.

This could be

the ring right here.

And you know

what that means.

Sure. Cut him open, doc.

I'll grab his paws.

That's a little drastic.

If it's in there,

all you have to do

is wait for it to pass

through his system...

And then retrieve it.

I think you're

the only one psyched-up

for that treasure hunt,

doc.

Oh, you won this round,

my friend,

but this is

far from over.

What are you sniffin'

around for? It's all good grass.

Just do it.

I don't have all day.

Hey, I got an idea.

This worked on me once

in summer camp.

Oh...

Yeah.

Ooh!

Doesn't that feel good?

Nice warm water.

Loosens everything up.

It's so relaxing.

Yeah.

Great. Now I gotta go.

All right.

Put you right here.

Stay.

I'll be real quick.

Just number one.

[Grrr]

[Grrr]

Jack?

[Pooping noises]

Jack, wait!

Come on.

Uhh.

How we doin'?

[Sighs]

Sorry, boss. No ring.

Well, thanks for

comin' over, man.

I value this time

we spend together, boss.

Did I get any on me?

Mmm...A little

right here.

You got it.

Clean up.

Sure thing, boss.

[Jack panting]

Oh, my gosh. The only thing

worse than doggy breath

is doggy morning breath.

Go!

Wait. If you're up here,

then what's poking in...

Yoo hoo hoo! My God!

What?!

What are you doin'

in my bed?

It was cold

on the couch, and...

Besides, I heard a noise.

You just snuggled up on me

like some sort of pea pod.

[Chuckling]

Yeah.

Get out.

Wait.

Where'd you get

those underpants?

Oh, outta the hamper.

I had to dig a little.

Oh, my God!

That's disgusting!

Take 'em off!

No, don't. Wait.

Just...Get out.

[Doorbell chimes]

[Arf arf arf]

[Doorbell]

I'll get it.

[Arf]

Shh! Shh! Shh!

Shh! Shh!

Who is it?

It's lila.

God!

[Whimpers]

[Whimpering]

Shh!

Look out.

[Uneasily]

Hi.

Sorry. I didn't want

to interrupt you. I--

[chuckling] You didn't.

There's--we're not--

there's nothing--

we weren't--

there's noth--

[chuckling]

That's funny.

Uh...

Hi.

Good morning.

Good morning.

I'll go make

the bed.

Aaah! Ok.

This guy's, uh...

No, it's ok. I'm open.

Uh, I guess you didn't

have any luck last night.

I mean...With Jack.

Uh, so I made,

uh, posters.

And do you have something

to hang them with?

Yeah. Sure, I do. Wait here.

I'll go with you.

No.

No, no. It's no problem.

No, I'll be right back.

Just 2 seconds.

Ok. Let's do it.

I figure we'll start

on bradbury

and work our way north.

There's a little coffee shop

if you want to grab a bite.

I really...Appreciate

your help, but...

Isn't there somewhere

you have to be?

I own the place, baby.

I don't punch a clock.

Besides, you shouldn't

do this by yourself.

Dylan...

Rene called last night,

and I told him about Jack.

I must've been

very upset, but...

He offered to help me.

Like that's gonna work?

What a worm.

The guy thinks

he can weasel his way

back into your life

through your dog?

How could I say no?

I'll coach you.

Mm-hmm.

[Arf arf]

Were you hungry, too?

There you go.

[Chuckles]

Knock yourself out.

Plenty of vitamins.

Good for your coloring.

How's this?

I think a little incentive

would not hurt.

A reward, perhaps?

No. I cannot.

I don't have enough.

But I do.

Give me the pen.

Oh...Thank you!

Merci!

You're welcome.

Wow. A hundred dollars.

It's a lot of money,

you know?

Yeah, if you're tryin'

to get a chicken back.

Loo loo

no. I cannot--

shh.

I insist.

Uh-huh. We are

talking about dollars.

I see.

Are you crazy, rene?

This is too much. I cannot--

uh! Let's be adults

about this, shall we?

Ha ha! Are we done?

Oh, yes. We're done.

What business did

you say you were in?

Oh, I own a little

restaurant. Italian food.

I hope you sell

a lot of noodles.

The life I lead

is the life of a dog

I may have fleas,

but I run our yard

I see those clones

lookin' down on me

but unlike those clones,

this dog is free

oh, lord,

it's a dog's life

oh, lord,

it's a dog's life

dog's life

oh, lord,

it's a dog's life

oh, lord,

it's a dog's life

dog's life

I'm feelin' kinda high,

really high

high, high, high, high...

the life I lead

is the life of a dog

I may have fleas,

but I run our yard

I ain't no slave

to a suit and a tie

no rat-race clone,

I'll never be that guy

I ain't caught up

in some selfish career

I'm livin' in love,

oh, not in fear

I see those clones

lookin' down on me

but unlike those clones

oh, lord,

it's a dog's life

dog's life

oh, lord,

it's a dog's life

dog's life,

oh, lord, it's...

I know what

you're trying to do,

but it won't work.

I know what you did do,

and you don't deserve her.

Listen, man,

she speaks 5 languages,

plays 6 instruments.

She eats les coquilles,

les grenouilles.

She drinks montrachet

and chateau margaux.

So if you think

you're gonna get her

with some spaghetti

and meatballs...

I think you're

out of your mind...

And out of your league.

She and I have

a history together.

And in case

you haven't heard...

How you say?

History repeats itself.

Well, rene, you may

have all that over me.

In fact, you do.

But the good thing

about me is,

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes