Lost Cat Corona Page #2

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I live every day

to die, partner.

So today, it's me or you?

Yeah, tweasel said

to look out for you.

Yeah, tweasel is a fucktard.

And, let's be clear on, man.

I'm hearing.

Tweasel organizes

a whole little party.

We just here to facilitate.

You get my brother's truck

back here.

And we'll take it from there,

clean, no wrinkles.

You have my word.

And what word are

we talking about here?

Is the word chair?

Or is it recalcitrant?

I would like that word.

It...

It's my promise.

I got you again!

You gotta relax, Bambi!

Don't push it over 60.

It'll stall.

It has a tendency to stall.

Maybe I'll step into

the spray booth a little.

Catch a little buzz.

That sh*t'll turn

your brain to glue, come on.

Nah, that smells good!

Right, amen?

Amir.

You know how to drive a stick?

Ah, been a while.

That's all right.

It's automatic.

Don't you ever f***ing

point your finger at me!

I will cut it off!

There she is.

Unless you planning on

running on fumes?

Hit the f***ing pump.

Where'd you find him?

Hey. Not yet.

You find him?

Did you shake

the dry food bag outside?

I shook the bag.

I'm out looking for him now.

Hey, tell her

you just found an ear.

Can you believe we're still

waiting for my mother

to go into surgery?

I want to hang myself.

Wait a second.

What's going on?

I'm waiting to find

if Connie hung herself.

How is it for her?

This is so ridiculous.

They actually had to

get here early, for what?

My mother hasn't had

a thing to eat.

Since midnight.

Mom, please.

Did you check the Gregory's?

Think I'm gonna pass out.

Stop.

All right, listen.

Let me call you once she gets in

to surgery all right?

Hey, make sure

you call me all right.

Don't forget.

Call me, okay.

Bye.

Yeah. Bye.

Everything copacetic?

Yeah.

What kind of a surgery

is Connie's mom having?

Hernia.

Ooh, a guy worked out a hernia.

His intestines went right into

his right nut.

Blew up like a soft ball.

I'm pretty sure

that's not gonna happen

to Connie's mom.

It's definitely

a man's ear for sure.

I wonder whose is it?

I say,

we looking for a guy, 6'2",

brown hair,

walks with a limp,

or a guy

with his left ear cut off,

who knows.

I don't wanna know.

But I'm riding around

with a guy's ear in a bag.

So I don't wanna

talk about it.

I still can't believe

you put that f***ing money

in your pocket.

Why!

Why?

Because of the fact

it was in a bag

with a decomposing ear.

Means nothing to you, huh?

Whipped your sorry ass.

You jumped before go.

It doesn't count.

Oh, it counts.

Come on.

You really are a dick sometimes.

See, I told you already.

Cecil went away with her folks.

Dealing with

some family sh*t.

Like you said.

They're not home.

You're not thinking

of breaking in, are you?

Hello.

What are you two

doing back here?

Is Cecil home?

We go to school with her.

I don't like you sneaking around

looking in windows.

Oh, we sneaking?

She's not here.

So, why don't you call or

text her, or whatever it is

you do?

Thanks.

We'll see Cecil at school.

F*** her.

Wherever she is.

All right,

what are you looking at now?

We are right on schedule, man.

We covered that, and that...

Louis and park.

Why don't we just look

on the other side

of coroner Avenue?

Well, we haven't covered

the entire quadrant yet.

I was...

Etiquette!

Etiquette said so.

What do you know of etiquette?

Where do you come up

with this sh*t?

I'm talking about

modern day etiquette.

Fellatio.

You could check on this.

Fellatio, is the sincerest

form of flattery.

"Don't flatter yourself,"

just got

a whole new meaning.

Oh, wait a second.

Maybe it's all sex.

'Cause that's both

man and woman.

Now you are

one messed up individual.

Don't you have to be some place?

Oh, come on.

You know you'd miss me.

I would.

For all the wrong reason.

For all the right reason.

Hey, what's up?

What are you doing?

Ricky!

- Hey, ponce!

- Son of a b*tch, man!

How are you, man?

What's up, man?

Yo, you with this guy?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You live here?

No, this is

my lady's friend place.

What do you think?

Yo, what's up?

What are you doing around here?

We're looking for his cat.

Dom, Ricky. Ricky, dom.

A cat?

Yeah.

Man, personally, listen to me.

I don't dig cats.

I'm more of a dog guy.

They're loyal.

They won't run off on you.

Some people with cats,

they are like real a**holes,

you know what I mean.

No offense,

know what I'm saying.

But hey, I almost ran over a cat

coming over here now, though.

By 104, near the church.

Yeah.

Yeah, I almost got

three points.

Listen, our first solid

lead in the case.

Bye, I love you.

Good seeing you, man.

Say hi to the family.

Take care.

A**hole.

You know, I may be an a**hole,

but your friend was an a**hole,

for calling me an a**hole.

Well, let's go back

and beat him to a pulp.

Hey, you may wanna

double up on that.

What, you don't believe in them,

god, heaven, death, evil,

all that stuff?

Nah.

I think about it.

Whether I'm heading

up or down.

What's gonna be said

on my headstone.

I know what mine's gonna say.

I should have been cremated.

Well, you can never

make up your mind

on this sh*t.

He's not here.

Let's get the hell out.

Father.

Father, for the rectory.

No, no, please, please.

What time is it?

I'm starving.

Again with this.

Wonder if Dominic

checked the playground.

Enough with the cat.

You're more worried of him,

than you're of me.

Oh, stop being so melodramatic.

I bet somebody died in the or.

That's why we're still waiting.

It's probably that

old hunch back lady

with that frizzy gray hair

that was sitting over there.

She looked horrible.

Hey,

I'm sitting over here now.

If they don't call you soon,

I'm gonna perform

the surgery myself.

Would you two stop now?

Could I like, maybe have

a piece of hard candy?

No.

It will kill you, ma.

Whoever heard of somebody

dying from a piece of candy?

People choke on candy

all the time.

Look at me.

You need an empty stomach.

How much room

can a piece of candy take?

Oh my god,

we're gonna be here all day.

If Dominic doesn't find Leonard,

I'm gonna kill him.

I swear.

Stop being so melodramatic.

- Sal...

- Johnny...

Sal, what you're asking me

is totally out of the question.

Just tell me truthfully.

How much you making

on the casket?

It's just not done.

There are health laws.

Come on, sal!

Health laws? They're dead.

What are you worried about?

I'm gonna catch the flu?

Look, all I'm saying is,

we flip it.

It's against the law.

I can't. I won't.

You're telling me

you don't resell stuff.

How many funerals

those flowers been to out there?

Johnny, my father's being

cremated for Christ sake.

We're recycling,

look at it that way.

Good for the planet, no?

Come on.

How much you making

on the box?

Eight hundred, a grand.

It's none of your business,

how much I'm making on the box.

How about that, sal?

Johnny, come on.

Come on, Sally...

Oh, Johnny,

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