Love, Wedding, Marriage Page #6
A night out with the boys.
- Yeah.
I got to tell you,
you got to leave the old ball
and chain at home sometimes.
Although I can't complain.
I love being married.
I have never had this much sex
in my life.
to get laid.
Get married.
Hello.
- You don't have sex
all the time.
- Oh, yeah.
Whenever I want.
Every which way.
- I miss my wife.
- Aw.
- Look, Bradley, I'm sure
you guys will work it out,
and if you don't...
- Yeah, be a man.
Bradley, there are plenty
Eastern Europe is teeming
just dying to marry
a rich American.
- Let's not get ahead
of ourselves here, Gerber.
- 60 is the new 30.
I saw you over
at the karaoke machine,
ripping it up,
going to work.
[Tarzan yell]
all over your Johnson.
Yeah, they will be lining up
for a man with your experience.
- You think?
- Absolutely.
- Bet you find
a nice Jewish girl.
Uh-oh.
- Wouldn't Betty just love that?
- Oh, I know the perfect place
to celebrate your
- Where?
- Got any dollar bills on you?
- Ah!
Let's have shots for everybody.
- We are gonna put
some b*obs on your face.
Okay?
- Okay, just this one time.
Yes.
- Booby in your eye.
- I know the separation's
hard on you, Ava,
so I really appreciate
your show of support.
in no time at all.
- I just figured if you're gonna
be gone for six months,
you need to be
internet and email savvy.
Now we can keep in touch.
- Well, I must admit,
I am a little nervous.
- You are?
- Well, it's been a long time
since I did anything
this exciting or brave.
I can't remember
the last time I did anything
without your father.
- Or you could do this with him.
- Dad travel?
He has a hard time
going to the mailbox.
- [Laughs]
I just know he's devastated
without you.
[Bluesy rock music playing]
- [Slurping]
- Chase it!
- Yeah!
- Oh!
Who's next?
- Oh, my God!
- Here's Bradley!
- Aren't you just a little sad
that your marriage is over?
- Well, of course I am, Ava,
but your father's incapable
of change or even compromise.
And I refuse to be unfulfilled
any longer.
- Why didn't you say anything
before?
- I suppose I was
too busy worrying
about everyone else's needs
[Indistinct chatter]
Doesn't that sound like...
[loud thud]
What?
- I'm all right.
I'm okay.
No problem.
Oh, you know, Charlie,
you're my bestest,
favoritest son-in-law ever.
- Really?
'Cause you're, like,
my very favorite
most father-in-law ever.
- Oh, come on,
give me a hug.
- Bradley Gold.
- Did you hear that?
That sounded like my wife,
except I don't have one anymore.
[Laughter]
- Exactly what did you have
to drink tonight?
- I don't know, but I'm sure
wasn't Manischewitz.
[Laughter]
- You should be ashamed
of yourself.
- What?
- What the hell
is wrong with you?
- How was I supposed to know
your mom would be here?
- I told you I was gonna try
to get the two of them together.
This is your idea of helping?
- You told me to cheer him up.
Trust me,
tonight he was so happy.
- Please tell me you did not
take my father Hot Chicks Live.
- We didn't go
to Hot Chicks Live.
Gerber's way too cheap
for Hot Chicks Live.
- Gerber was with you?
I hope you took a cab.
- I guess chauffer duties were
in their marriage arrangements,
'cause Gerber's wife
drove us home.
And she's great,
and they're having sex...
great Polish sex,
whatever that means...
whenever he wants.
- Show up at your daughter's
house this time of night,
drunk as a skunk.
I mean, what do you have
to say for yourself?
- [Burps]
- [Snickers]
- Thank you, Bradley,
for validating a very difficult
life-altering decision
I've just made.
I now know
absolutely for certain
that leaving you is the smartest
thing I've ever done.
- Mom, you don't mean that.
- Yeah.
- Do you know that I dis...
I discovered tonight
at this strip club?
- I thought you said you didn't
take him to a strip club.
- No, I said I didn't take him
to Hot Chicks Live.
- I learned that there are women
in this world who want me.
- Oh, they don't want you,
you idiot.
They want your dollar bills.
- You know,
there's a nation in Europe
that has a lot
who want to have sex with me.
- And time for bed.
- Too bad that you don't have
the balls
to fly out there and meet them.
- Well, then I'll just have
to ship them in.
- [Screams]
- Mazel tov.
- Oh!
I squished my fish.
Oh, no.
- Dude, did you say you were
gonna ship your balls?
- Poor Malcolm.
- This is what I'll be missing?
- Mom, please.
- Hey, Bradley, when I'm
cavorting naked on a Fiji beach
with my Polynesian Adonis,
I shall try to remember
to send you a postcard.
[Door slams]
- Oh...
I think that went well.
- I...
- "I" what?
- I love you.
- Do you realize
that what you did tonight
brought my parents
closer than ever to divorce?
- What I did?
I was just trying
to cheer him up.
I was helping you.
But if you hadn't tried
to interfere tonight,
none of this would have happened
in the first place.
- Charlie, my parents
are getting divorced.
I have real problems.
- You know, maybe we should stop
focusing on your parents...
Nice shelves.
- Uh, what's that supposed
to mean?
- Well, for one thing,
it's been a little difficult
to have sex
with your dad staying here.
- Oh, I'm surprised you noticed.
You've been so busy
texting with Adrianna.
Work must be crazy.
- You're the one
who's too distracted
with everyone else's problems
to even have sex
with your own husband.
- [Sighs]
It's not been that long
since we've had sex,
and I've been busy.
- Well, you're not
- Ugh, Charlie,
if you think I'm gonna
sleep with you right now,
you're even more drunk
than I thought.
Oh!
Is it really too much to ask
to replace
Is it really that difficult?
What is it?
A genetic predisposition
to measure your shits
against the amount
Oh!
And just so you know,
I did not fall in love with you
again today.
[Tranquil instrumental music]
- Morning, beautiful.
I made your favorite.
Black coffee,
two sugars.
Wheat toast with mayo.
Truce?
- Truce.
I have to cancel
the surprise party.
- You can't save
every marriage, Ava.
- I feel like such a failure.
- Promise me
you're done intervening.
- I have no other choice.
- Promise?
Meet me tonight for dinner?
- Mm-hmm.
I can tell that some
positive changes
have taken place
since our last session.
What's going on?
- When we left here, I began
to make that list you suggested.
I dug really deep,
and I realized the main reason
I was attracted to Courtney
was because her family was rich.
- Perhaps you were looking
to Courtney
Translation
Translate and read this script in other languages:
Select another language:
- - Select -
- 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
- 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
- Español (Spanish)
- Esperanto (Esperanto)
- 日本語 (Japanese)
- Português (Portuguese)
- Deutsch (German)
- العربية (Arabic)
- Français (French)
- Русский (Russian)
- ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
- 한국어 (Korean)
- עברית (Hebrew)
- Gaeilge (Irish)
- Українська (Ukrainian)
- اردو (Urdu)
- Magyar (Hungarian)
- मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
- Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Italiano (Italian)
- தமிழ் (Tamil)
- Türkçe (Turkish)
- తెలుగు (Telugu)
- ภาษาไทย (Thai)
- Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
- Čeština (Czech)
- Polski (Polish)
- Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Românește (Romanian)
- Nederlands (Dutch)
- Ελληνικά (Greek)
- Latinum (Latin)
- Svenska (Swedish)
- Dansk (Danish)
- Suomi (Finnish)
- فارسی (Persian)
- ייִדיש (Yiddish)
- հայերեն (Armenian)
- Norsk (Norwegian)
- English (English)
Citation
Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"Love, Wedding, Marriage" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/love,_wedding,_marriage_12980>.
Discuss this script with the community:
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In