Love Crazy Page #2

8:
00 railroad time?

You know, that's 7:00 our time,

in case you're planning to meet her.

Yes. You mustn't be late at the station.

You know how she hates

- to be kept waiting.

- Yes.

You two are sweet

to worry about Aunt Laura,

but I've checked the time

and there's no hurry.

- I completely forgot!

- What?

Nothing you have to dash out

and attend to, I hope.

You can mail it for me.

It's my insurance premium.

It must be mailed tonight

or my policy lapses.

- I'll give it to the elevator boy.

- Oh, no, don't you dare!

It has a check in it.

I hate to trouble you, but...

Oh, no trouble at all.

Why, what else would I have to do?

Thank you, Stephen.

You won't lose it, will you, dear?

No, no, no. I'll tie it around my neck.

Stephen, you're so amusing.

Always clowning!

Look at him!

- Thanks for the rug.

- Oh, you're welcome.

Good evening, Mrs. Grayson.

Good evening.

Hello, sugar.

Isobel!

Oh, Stevie, darling!

I haven't seen you since you were married.

No. Well, four years to a day.

Don't tell me

you're not back in circulation yet.

No, not me. I'm stuck for life, and I like it.

That doesn't sound like Stevie

the party boy!

- Weren't you married, too?

- A month after you jilted me.

But with me, it was different.

I had to do something

to mend my broken heart.

Oh, your broken heart, my foot!

You were glad to get rid of me!

Anyway,

that's what I told people.

- Oh, Steve, you're looking elegant.

- Oh, really? I wasn't even trying.

- What are you doing here?

- I just moved in. You live here?

- Yeah, 12A.

- 11B! Well, we're neighbors.

Remember that if you ever want

to borrow a cup of sugar, sugar.

Well, this must be my floor.

No, I'm sorry, Mrs. Grayson,

it isn't your floor.

As a matter of fact, it isn't anybody's floor.

The power's off again!

I can think of a lot better places to park.

Hello! Hello, janitor?

Listen, dopey.

I told you that machine was on the blink.

Now it's stuck dead, you sap!

I wouldn't antagonize him right now.

Oh, he says he don't know

what's the matter with it,

and he don't know

how long it'll take to fix.

What are you going to do?

Well, we'll have to go out through the top.

Through the top?

You'd better knock.

The people upstairs might be busy.

- Give me a boost, will you, Mr. Ireland?

- Oh, yeah, sure.

There you are.

Well, I guess you're next.

Alley-oop!

- How is your acrobatic work?

- It hasn't changed much.

Now, just...

Here, you put your foot on my shoulder.

I better take these off.

I don't want to stab you to death.

Oh, thanks.

I guess I wouldn't look so well

in footprints.

Oh, Punkins.

- Come on, Punkins.

- Oh, yes, Punkins, huh?

Say, whatever happened

to that wirehair I gave you?

He disappeared about the same time

you did, you thief!

Me?

I'm sorry I ran into you, Stevie.

You bring back that old feeling!

Oh, you mean that old feeling

that threw a flowerpot at me

the last time you saw me?

I'll never forgive myself for that.

The geraniums died!

What's the matter?

Is my face tickling your foot?

The last thing you said to me

four years ago

was that you were not going

to let me walk all over you!

Oh, yes,

it seems to come back to me now.

Hey, can you give me a hand there, Joe?

Of course, this elevator would never stick

when my mother...

My mother-in-law was in it.

Yeah, probably ran like a clock.

- Nice place they have here.

- Yeah.

A lovely view.

Wonder what would happen

if we went on up to the roof?

Jelly.

Oh, well, here we are.

Now, let's see... Oh, yes.

Punkins, out you go.

Now... Well, I guess perhaps

I'd better crawl out first.

Here, Joe, hold those doors, will you?

Stephen, play like it's a transom

you're climbing over.

Where you going?

Oh, quick, do something! Steve!

Hurry! Hurry!

Oh, for heaven's sakes, hurry!

Hang on, Steve, we'll be right back!

Hurry!

Get away!

No! No, no, no, no.

No!

Just another second. I'm gonna

be right there. Come on, Joe, step on it.

All right, take it easy, take it easy.

A little further now.

Stop! Hold it, hold it, that's enough!

You're going to go too far! Hold it!

No, no, that's all right. Stop.

Quick! I mean slow! Slow. There, that's...

Stop!

Go down. Down.

Hey! Down!

Steve, are you hurt?

Oh, you need a drink!

Gee... Gee, you scared me to death!

Come on, Steve, sit right over here.

There, sit down.

You're going to be all right.

You looked like a fly on a flagpole.

I thought you were gonna fall any minute.

Here. This ought to help you.

Now do you feel better?

Oh, we have to do better than that.

Here, take some more.

How's that?

I still feel as if I'm choking.

Oh, my goodness, you are!

Here, let me fix it.

- There, is that better?

- Oh, oh, yeah.

- It's all right now.

- Take another sip.

Just relax and take it easy! Sit back.

You'll be all right in just a minute.

You're lucky you can even swallow.

Yeah, if I couldn't swallow,

I wouldn't want to live.

Same old Stevie!

Oh, boy! Was that close!

- This is like old times, isn't it?

- Yes, isn't it?

Yes, a little too much like old times.

I'm married now.

Well, so am I.

What's that got to do with it?

Can't I give an old pal a little first aid?

Oh, well, I remember your first aid, Isobel.

You... You don't stick to the rules.

Oh, you couldn't have gotten

that stuffy in just four years.

Let's see if marriage

has taken all the laughter out of you!

You...

No... Isobel!

You... Don't... Now, let me up!

Isobel, stop!

- Now, no... Don't...

- I thought so! You are alive.

Yeah, but I wouldn't be long

if your husband came in.

- Oh, Pinky. Don't worry about him.

- I'll worry about him if I want to.

I wanna tickle you.

You look so cute when you're shocked.

Don't. Please, Isobel.

I've had a very trying day...

- Oh, well, who's that?

- That's Eloise. Pinky uses her for a model.

Say, where is this Pinky of yours?

He's in his studio up on the roof

painting some old guy's portrait.

He won't be down for days!

Oh, Stevie, I'm bored!

- You know what?

- Yes, I do know what!

- What?

- I... I'm gonna leave.

That's not as good as my what!

Let's duck down to Tony's

and bend an elbow with the old gang!

You see, I... I've got to go to dinner.

Telephone your wife

you're stuck at the office.

- Let's play hooky.

- No. My... My hooky days are over.

I got to run.

You weren't married, you were embalmed!

Steve Ireland,

where have you been?

Why, you're all dirty!

What on earth happened?

- Darling, what's wrong?

- The thing... The elevator, it broke down.

Dear me, it didn't take you all this time

to walk up just 12 flights of stairs!

Well, I did waste a little time

trying to avoid being killed.

Oh, darling, was there an accident?

Are you sure you're not hurt?

Oh, no, no, I'm fine now, but...

Oh, boy, it was a close escape!

- Oh, darling!

- ngel!

Oh, your hat. Steve, you've lost your hat.

Oh, I guess I must have left it

in the elevator when I climbed out.

You see, honey...

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