Love Is All There Is Page #2

Mikey...

l got to talk to you private.

Can we go up to the house?

Sure.

Rocco, stay with the sauce.

She tries anything funny...

throw yourself

in front of the pot.

Will you promise me that if

l tell you this problem...

you won't make fun of me?

l promise.

You know that l'm psychic.

Yeah?

And so is my friend Mona.

Mona the nut?

Mona is not a nut.

She's a clairvoyant

for a living...

and the Blessed Roscoe

told Mona...

that Rosario is going

to fall in love...

and give up everything

for his Juliet.

Every week, Mona's got

a different saint or angel...

that nobody ever heard of

who speaks only to her.

How can you believe this stuff?

Because Mona helps me find

the invisible forces here.

lt helps me discover

what l'm doing here on earth.

l discussed it in my prayers

with the Holy Mother...

and she said

it was OK with her.

You want me to ask her again?

-Dear Holy Mother--

-No, no, no.

Don't bother the Holy Mother

with something like this.

Look, l'm a little tired.

l want to take a nap.

You want to take a nap with me?

-Nap?

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-OK. l'll be right back.

l got Fidella in the middle

so you can hold her, too.

As is a winged messenger

of Heaven...

into the white-upturned

wandering eyes...

the lazy-pacing clouds

and sails...

upon the bosom of the air...

of mortals that fall back

to gaze on him...

when he bestrides

the lazy, puffing clouds.

O Romeo! Romeo!

Whereforth art thou, Romeo?

Deny thy father!

And refuse thy na...

l hope l didn't do that

with my negative thoughts.

Are you all right, lsabel?

l can't move my leg!

Rosario, go get Dr. Rondino.

Tell him to come right over.

How did this happen,

Miss DeLuca?

l seen the whole episode,

Monsignor.

She overacted with her foot...

and tumbled down like

a wounded rhino. Forsooth.

Don't call me no rhino,

zits breath.

How am l supposed

to get married tomorrow?

l hate this stupid play!

l told you the balcony

was made of plywood.

Why did you stamp your foot?

l should have harnessed her

to the wall, Dr. Rondino.

Oh, no. lt wouldn't

have helped, Miss DeLuca.

lt's not broken.

You just stay off it

for 24 hours...

and you'll be marching

down the aisle.

All right, boys,

help her out to my car.

We've got to get you home

and get that leg iced.

-What a buffalo!

-Shut up, you shithead!

Twenty-four hours!

We'll have the understudy

play Juliet.

Understudy?

Where is Niccolina Sousto?

Niccolina, where are you going?

l don't know the whole part.

l'll whisper the words

to you off the stage.

Please, Father,

don't make me do this.

Niccolina, you only have

to do your best.

OK, Niccolina, we'll find

somebody else to play the part.

l know the part, Miss DeLuca.

l always wanted to play it.

No, Francis!

You're too good as the nurse...

and it would be too hard

to replace you.

lsn't that right, Monsignor?

What else can we do, Sadie?

We're sold out.

We'll have to give refunds.

Why don't we call

all the dramatic schools...

and we'll find

some really nice girl...

who can read the part

from the script?

This is a very good idea, Sadie.

But let's make sure that

all the girls send over...

their most recent photographs

with their hobbies...

their future ambitions,

and their religious attitudes.

Why do l have to be here?

This may be the girl we spend

the rest of our lives with.

You can stop calling.

This couple just came in

and made a donation...

and then they told me

their daughter played that part.

She'll play Juliet

to your son's Romeo.

You look familiar.

ls possible.

Mr. and Mrs. Cappamezza...

meet Count

and Contessa Malacici.

Pleasure.

Look, Sadie,

it's just for one night...

so let's not make

a big thing out of it.

OK, Sadie?

Feel better?

A little.

There must be a way...

l can turn around what

Mona said is going to happen.

Look...

you think l want Rosario

to ejaculate himself...

out of this family prematurely?

But did anything Mona ever

tell you would happen happen?

Practically everything.

How come she told you...

that we're going to be rich,

and we're in debt...

that your mother

was going to move out...

and she just asked us

for a new mattress...

that your friend Sally would

have the best year of her life,

and she died? How come?

Oh, ye of little faith.

Once we raise enough money

to franchise our sauces...

and our wedding creations,

we are going to be rich.

And my mother

still may move out...

and she'll take

her new mattress with her.

My girlfriend Sally

could be having...

her best year ever

right now in Heaven.

Ma! Pop! l just heard

about the Malacici girl.

Pop, could you imagine them

asking me to play Romeo...

opposite the daughter

of that Florentine?

Every bone in my body tells me

l should quit right now...

and forget about it.

Honey, if you feel like that--

But the show must go on.

Miss DeLuca wants me...

to go introduce myself

before rehearsal.

-l'm going with you!

-What for?

lt will give me a chance

to see their operation.

But l got to go home and change

into something more apropos.

God Almighty!

Get a load of this place!

These people wouldn't know

a sausage if they fell over one.

Makes me sick to go in there.

-Maybe--

-Are you all right, Ma?

Do l have a bump?

Here. Let me see.

lt's all right, Ma.

This Romeo is a mama's boy.

What masculine boy

kisses a mother...

on the eye

after three years old?

Hi. l'm Rosario Cappamezza.

This is my--

Yes. We have met at the church.

l thought l would chaperone

the children to rehearsal...

because l wanted to be

socially au courant...

and because l'm the mother.

Please come in.

Beautiful.

Gina just returned

from her boarding school...

and she's taking

her beauty bath.

Please to sit down, eh?

May we offer you

some refreshment?

We have profiterole,

tiramisu, banana torte...

eight kinds of gelati,

and six kinds of sorbetto.

All fresh...

homemade, home-grown,

and hand-decorated.

No, thank you.

We make all the same desserts...

plus zuppa lnglese,

zabaione, coppa di marrone.

Don't tell me

you make your own chocolate.

Milk, bittersweet, nougat,

and white with nuts.

From a recipe

that is 400 years old?

From a recipe

that Frank Sinatra himself...

said was the best

he ever tasted on City lsland.

The president of ltaly...

once ate two portions of

our risotto con funghi.

During the pope's visit

in 1982...

the Holy Father

had three portions...

of our clams posillipo, to go.

ln four centuries

of operation...

our restaurant

in Firenze was visited...

by two nuns who later

were canonized--

Santa Teresa DeMontania...

and Santa Rudolpha Legatti...

for whom our bronzino in

brodetto di Rudolpha was named.

Our dishwasher speaks Chinese.

This is our daughter Regina.

Hi.

This is my mother

Sadie Cappamezza...

and l'm R-r-r...

Rosario Cappamezza.

How do you do?

Gina has consented

to play the part of Juliet...

even though

she must leave tomorrow.

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