Major League Page #5

they went on to great careers.

Take Ryan there.

- What about him?

- Never mind Ryan.

Read these letters for me.

You can't read them, can you?

Yo, man, they look nice.

I had a pair just like 'em.

Well, after the game, I'm gonna

pick out a pair that's more me.

- Good luck.

- They look good.

Besides, seeing's

the most important thing, son.

I don't think it's that important.

F***.

All right, let's hit the field.

Up your butt, Jobu.

Yo, bartender! Jobu needs a refill!

- Head's up!

- Yo, watch it!

Hustle! Let's go!

- God damn!

- Sh*t.

We're in the ninth.

Two down, a man on first,

and the Indians clinging to

a one-run lead.

Ricky Vaughn,

the kid they call "Wild Thing,"

one out away

from his first major league victory.

Vaughn's been looking good

out there today.

Don't worry, he'll blow it.

Vaughn's showing some signs

of fatigue out there.

He seems to have lost some zip

on his fastball.

Slow curve. Here's a swing,

and a bouncing ball.

Dorn has a chance to make the play.

He can't get it.

Clark digging around second.

He'll make it to third easily.

And the A's have runners at the corners.

Dorn didn't get much of a jump

on that ball, Monte.

But let's give him credit,

at least he didn't spike himself.

You want me to get him

out of there, Lou?

No.

He's come this far,

let's see if he can finish it.

Come on, we need some defense here!

Johnny, maybe we ought to do

one of those waves.

So, Vaughn in a little trouble here.

But I'll tell you,

these Cleveland fans are great.

Listen to them get behind Vaughn.

- Hey, way to go, Rick!

- Go, Rick!

Come on, baby. Come on, Ricky.

Come on, Ricky.

Okay, Ricky, there's two outs,

so forget about the runners.

Get this guy at the plate.

Come on, Rick. Get tough.

This guy's a first-ball hitter.

You gotta come up

with something nasty.

F***ing Dorn.

This game should be over by now.

He could have had that ball.

He tanked it on purpose.

This isn't the California Penal League,

Vaughn.

We're professionals here.

We don't tank plays

for personal reasons,

so cut the crybaby sh*t.

Now, you pitched a hell of a game.

You want to finish it, don't you?

- Yeah.

- All right.

You think you can throw

a strike on this pitch?

There's not gonna be much on it.

My arm feels like Jell-O right now.

Just get it over the plate.

I want him to swing.

Last time I did that,

the guy hit one that hasn't landed yet.

Don't worry about it. I'll take care of it.

Number 27, right fielder Mike Rexman.

Hi, Rexman.

Hell of a situation we got here.

Two on, two out,

you guys trailing by one in the ninth.

You got a chance to be a hero

on national television.

If you don't blow it.

By the way, I saw your wife

at the Capri Lounge last night.

Hell of a dancer.

You must be very, very proud.

That guy she was with,

I mean, I'm sure

he's a close personal friend and all,

but tell me, what was he doing

wearing her panties on his head?

Swung on and popped up.

Uh-oh, Rexie,

I don't think this one's got the distance.

Taylor under it.

He's got it, and this ball game is over...

Sh*t.

...as the Indians hold out

for a 3-2 victory.

Yeah.

Starting to come together, Pepper.

Starting to come together.

Yeah.

Knock it off, Charlie.

Well, hi, Jake. Come on in.

Hi, Suzanne.

- How are you?

- Oh, I'm fine, thanks.

I was just wondering if I might have

a quick word with Roger?

Well, sure. He's in the solarium.

I'll get some coffee.

Oh, thank you.

United Airlines down three-quarters

at 141.

International Business Machines down

one-half to 96 and three-eighths.

American Telephone & Telegraph...

- Hey, Jake.

- Hey, Roger.

Nice place.

Yeah, we're still working on it,

trying to figure if we wanna take

this room Oriental or Santa Fe.

Listen, Rog, I had to talk to you

about something,

and I didn't want to do it

in front of the rest of the team.

Yeah, sure. What is it?

Here, have a seat. You want a beer?

Oh, no, thank you.

You have financial problems?

I could put you on

to a great investment guy.

No, I don't have much of a portfolio

right now,

but, you know,

what I was concerned about

was why you didn't come up

with that grounder

that Reichart hit in the ninth.

It was out of my reach.

What do you want me to do, dive for it?

Rog, it could have meant the game.

Oh, come on.

Cut the rah-rah sh*t, Taylor.

Year after this, I go free agent.

Plus, my agent and I got

a couple of plans for life after baseball.

So, I am not about to risk major injury,

or deface this property,

for a collection of stiffs.

You know, Dorn,

I liked you so much better

when you were just a ballplayer.

You were really great once.

If you want to be

an interior decorator now,

that's none of my business,

but some of us still need this team.

Now, you listen to me.

This is my last shot at a winner.

And for the younger guys,

it could be their only shot.

I don't know what happened to you,

but if you ever, ever tank another play

like you did today,

I'm gonna cut your nuts off

and stuff 'em down your f***ing throat.

Coffee, anybody?

Hello again, all you Wahoo maniacs.

This is Harry Doyle welcoming you

to another edition of Teepee Talk.

Hey, in case you haven't noticed,

and judging by the attendance,

you haven't,

the Indians have managed

to win a few here and there,

and are threatening

to climb out of the cellar.

Wild thing, you make my heart sing.

You know, they could be a lot worse.

You know, these guys

ain't so f***ing bad.

Oh, boy, this old body could use a soak.

Yeah? Well, forget it,

'cause it ain't working again.

Damn it! I thought they were gonna

replace this thing.

Hey! No hot water in here.

I've had it with this

nickel-and-dime stuff.

I'm gonna get that b*tch on the phone.

- You wanted to talk to the b*tch?

- Yeah.

Don't you think you ought to cover

yourself with a towel first, Mr. Brown?

We're out of towels,

and I'm too old to go diving into lockers.

I can take it if you can.

What happened to the new whirlpool

we were supposed to get?

Revenue problems have forced us

to cut back on equipment.

Cups still work, though.

We'll simply have to fix

the old whirlpool.

You fixed it six times already.

Now there's no hot water in the shower.

The pipes in this building

are old and rusted.

We're replacing them,

but it's a long, expensive process.

Sorry.

How am I supposed

to keep my players healthy

with cold water

and no therapy equipment?

Your players will just have to get

a little tougher.

What are they, a bunch of pansies?

Over 162 games,

even tough guys get sprains,

sore arms, muscle pulls.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes