Man of the House Page #7

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I don't think these guys can hear you.

All right, well, now that we've put the hex

on those Aggies...

I want y'all to raise your flames up high...

for someone who knows

a thing or two about spirit.

I am talking about

Assistant Cheer Coach Roland Sharp.

What am I supposed to do with this?

Inspire and electrify. Go!

All right.

Bring it.

This torch right here represents...

the spirit burning deep within the heart...

of each and every Longhorn

that never can be extinguished.

All right.

All right, you're all here because...

you want to see your Longhorns

emerge victorious.

You want to see them

dominate the football field...

and win the football game.

Well, then it's up to each

and every one of us to help them.

We got to raise them up.

We got to hoist them high...

to put them on a platform of positivity.

Any fool can feel good

when you're winning.

But when you're down 27 points

in the fourth quarter...

you got to ask yourself,

"Who you gonna call?"

I tell you who I'm going to call,

and that's these ladies right here.

They're the most spirited group

of young ladies I've ever seen...

or had a chance to get to know and

had the privilege of coming in contact with.

Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition!

Okay, now can I get a witness?

This man has got the spirit.

Swear to God, I thought

he was gonna start speaking in tongues.

What about "platform of positivity"?

I was gonna do a cartwheel,

but didn't want to steal the limelight.

I think Sharp just made a joke.

It's more of a jape or a jest,

but still, it's progress.

- Can we go to the party?

- Negativo, baby.

Please. When are you guys

gonna get over yourselves?

Nobody, I repeat, nobody is trying to kill us.

Get out of this van, right now! Let's go.

Come on.

This thing is not working.

- I'm stuck.

- Let's go!

I'm stuck! I can't get out!

Get down!

Okay, maybe somebody is trying to kill us.

How did they, like, find us?

They looked for us.

- What about Emma?

- She doesn't know where I am.

Yes, sir, she does.

She called last night on the house phone.

She was returning my call.

Was that a mistake?

Get them upstairs.

Come on, let's go.

Come on, move.

Hello?

- Where you at?

- I'm at home.

Where's your mother?

Dad, I told you. She and Keith

went to Cancn for a couple of days.

You don't have to check up on me.

Your friend from the FBI is here.

He told me everything.

Let me talk to him.

He wants to talk to you.

Hey, Sharp. How are your witnesses doing?

Everyone safe?

You're making a big mistake.

Good. I was just telling Emma that

a desperate guy is trying to cover a crime...

and if he couldn't get to you,

he might come looking for her.

Don't worry.

I'm here now, and everything's cool.

Emma doll, is there any more coffee?

- Sure, Mr. Zane.

- Thank you.

I'm a dead man, Sharp.

I don't care about your witnesses anymore.

All I want is the money

Ball stole from Cortland.

All right, the night you arrested Ball,

you took a key from him.

Yeah.

Good. Here's what you're gonna do.

You go to the bank,

take the money out of the safe deposit box...

put the money in a duffle bag,

get in your truck...

and meet me in Eagle Pass

near the border at 2:00 p.m.

Only you, Sharp. No one else.

Put your keys in the bag

and get out of the truck with the money.

Bag on the ground.

Put your weapon in the bag.

Put your cell phone in the bag,

get back in the truck...

and handcuff yourself to the steering wheel.

Don't try any tricks, Sharp.

I will shoot her right here and now.

Thanks, Roland. You're a good parent.

Please board immediately.

This is the last announcement...

for the bus leaving

for Laredo, Nuevo Laredo...

What the hell?

- What are y'all doing here?

- Barb's got a plan.

Barb has a plan?

You know what you're doing?

I spent a year in juvenile detention

for stealing cars.

It was an educational experience.

- How'd y'all get here?

- Brand-new car.

I think I'm having the baby.

I can't.

Evie, get it together.

I know you can do it. Just breathe.

Come on. Breathe. Ready?

Driver, stop the bus!

My friend's having a baby!

I did it!

I have to get off el autobs!

I have to have my baby in America!

I've got the bags.

Whoa, that's my bag.

- No, it's mine.

- It's my bag.

Hi, Emma. We're friends of your dad's,

so just follow me, okay?

Look, it's my bag, okay?

Drop the bag.

It's my bag!

Drop the bag.

- You okay?

- Yeah.

It's just like dismounting a stretch pyramid.

Off the bus!

You ready?

One, two.

Move it!

- Come on, Emma.

- Are you guys serious?

I'm a math major.

Move it!

You, too! Off the bus, now!

- Come on, you can do it!

- Jump!

You all right?

I'm fine.

Halt, seor.

Eddie, there's doctors, air conditioning

and three meals a day back in town.

And I need you to testify.

You're gonna have to kill me, Sharp.

God!

Damn.

Looking sharp, Sharp.

I don't know.

Maybe we should do another mask.

Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I almost forgot.

Cute.

Oh, my God! I'm so sorry. Damn it.

The language! Hello, we're in a church.

Look at you.

Hey, you guys.

Could you excuse us for a second?

- Sure.

- Yeah, okay.

Don't be nervous.

And Sharp, remember,

inspire and electrify, okay?

See you. Great.

I feel like a freak show in this dress.

Prettiest freak show I ever saw.

Wait till they see you at Vassar.

Actually...

I was thinking of turning Vassar down

and becoming a cheerleader.

Dad, that was a joke.

A joke. That's why I'm laughing so hard.

I love you, Daddy.

I love you, too, baby.

Dearly beloved...

we are gathered here for this most...

splendiferous and loquacious occasion...

to join this couple in holy matrimony.

Now, Roland...

do you promise to love this woman, and...

before you answer, remember that...

Percy!

Get on with it.

Sure, but of course.

- Well, do you?

- I do.

And, Molly...

radiant, beautiful Molly.

Molly. Good Golly, Miss Molly.

Do you promise to love Roland...

when he is odiferous...

indifferent, belligerent?

I do.

- You do?

- I do.

Well.

By the power vested in me

in the state of Texas...

I now pronounce you man and wife.

You may kiss your bride.

Come on, y'all, let's get this party started.

Who put this table here?

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