Matchstick Men Page #3

filtration system available today.

Mr. Schlickling, can you hold on

just one moment? Thank you.

What?

What`s going on with you?

You switch shampoos or something?

Those pills working?

Yeah. All right.

Well, l`m glad one of us is happy.

How much you think we can

take that guy for?

-Chuck, with the boat.

-You serious?

l figure l owe you one.

Man, that`s great!

Mr. Schlick-licker? Hi, l`m sorry.

You waited too long. No prize for you.

That`s awesome, man!

Sorry.

-Where`d you find him?

-Spearmint Rhino.

Watched him drop a couple G`s

there a month ago.

Spearmint Rhino.

-That`s a gentlemen`s--

-l know what it is.

lt`s right here.

-What does he do?

-lmport-export.

-What`s his last name?

-Frechette. Chuck Frechette.

-How do you spell that?

-F-R....

l don`t know.

He`s from Downey.

-He`s not connected, is he?

-No, no.

He and the mob, they`re like this:

Son of a b*tch didn`t even tip.

l figure, on short notice,

he could scratch up at least 30 grand.

More.

We`ll pull the Jamaican switch.

He knows you, so you`re rope. l`m inside.

You think he knows anything

about international finance?

Are you whispering?

-Why are you whispering?

-l am?

-Hi. Safety deposit box, please.

-Sure.

Hi. l`d like access

to my safety deposit box, 366, please.

Certainly, Mr. Waller.

Signature and pass code, please.

-Would you like a booth?

-No, thanks. l`ll be fine.

When it`s sterling versus dollars and--

For some people, money is....

-Frank.

-Where do you want to meet, sexy?

What do you mean, ``where``?

Where else? The Rhino.

-One hour.

-Hey, you don`t wanna get there early?

l gotta go.

Remember me?

-You just in the neighborhood?

-Took the bus. Think l could come in a sec?

-One, two, three.

-Nice!

lt`s nice, your place.

Could you watch the carpet, please?

Sorry.

Could you please take your shoes off?

Oh, yeah, sorry.

So, what`s going on?

Mom and l had sort of a fight.

Happens once in a while.

l usually take off for a day or two

to let her calm down.

Take off?

Normally, l go to Carrie`s,

only she`s on vacation.

And l thought, since we seemed

to hit it off so well last time...

...l could sleep on your couch.

You want to stay here?

Well, l could pay you back

by cleaning up or something.

Do you wear those to read? Your glasses?

They make you look old.

Oh, no, these are for....

l gotta go!

l got a big business meeting.

-This late?

-Antiques, they wait for no man.

ls it all right if l leave

you here alone?

Sure, l can just watch TV.

You don`t have a TV?

Seriously? You don`t have a TV?

There`s a couch, if you want to sit.

Or over there, if you prefer.

Or the couch.

Do you want me to pick you up

something on the way back?

-Like, what is it, ice cream, right?

-Sure.

New York Super Fudge Chunk.

That`s my favorite flavor.

-New York....

-Super Fudge Chunk.

Chocolate, yeah.

Okay, now listen...

...don`t, don`t open the door

for anybody, all right?

One, two, three.

All right!

Here you go, sweetie.

Yeah, all right.

Here we go, babe.

-Bob, good to see you!

-Arden, hope l didn`t keep you.

Over there. He missed you coming in.

Over there. He missed you coming in.

Hey, kate! Can l get a beer?

A Heinie?

-Thanks. That do the trick?

-Let`s sit.

l told you you were gonna like it here.

No way!

Here you go, sweetie.

-Love them shoes, girl.

-Thank you, baby.

Hey, Bob!

Hey, Chuck, l didn`t know you were here.

Hey, Chuck Frechette, this is Arden--

Hiya.

Hey....

l gotta do a little business,

you mind if...?

Sure, Bob. l didn`t mean to--

Sorry. l`ll be--

-Nice meeting you. l`ll be over here.

-Great.

That`s fish in a barrel.

He`s piqued. You good to go?

-Does the pope poo in the woods?

-Just say yes.

-l`ll see you, Bob.

-l`ll see you in the morning, Arden.

-Hi.

-Hi.

-Big night planned.

-Oh, it`s not for me.

-Right. That`s $ 1 2.73.

-Okay.

Out of 1 5.

Thirteen, 1 4, 1 5.

You got kids overnight?

Roy? Why did Mom leave you?

Well, you`d have to ask her that.

l did. She said she didn`t

wanna talk about it.

Called you names.

That`s why we got in a fight.

She said you were a bad guy.

-You don`t seem like a bad guy.

-That`s what makes me good at it.

Well, l don`t think you`re a bad guy.

Good night.

Good night.

Someone`s in here!

l think it`s disrespectful.

l just think it`s disrespectful.

-Hey, come on.

-One, two, three.

l wish you could`ve been there.

l reeled him in, man.

-Hallelujah! You got a chick in there?

-What are you doing?

What`s the hubbub?

The second you left the place,

he was off his barstool. He`s in.

-He`s in. He wants to meet tonight.

-All right.

Push it till tomorrow.

Let his greed meet his imagination.

Morning.

Good morning.

l made you eggs.

That`s okay.

So who was that guy

who came by earlier?

Business associate.

Well, what was his name?

Frank.

How come you didn`t want him to see me?

lt`s not that l don`t want him to see--

Don`t you think you should eat eggs

for breakfast? Something healthy.

l don`t like eggs.

Anyways, all you`ve got here is tuna.

Lots of tuna.

And one TV dinner?

TV dinners are cool.

You should get the TV to go with them.

l like tuna fish.

Hi, Mom. No.

No.

So what if l am?

So? He`s my father.

Well, l don`t care.

l don`t care!

Well, l will if l want!

No. l know.

Okay, l promise.

Okay, bye.

She mad?

At me, not you.

-She said she was gonna call the police.

-Oh, God.

Oh, God.

But now she just wants me home

in time for summer school.

When`s that start?

Monday.

Today`s Thursday.

That`s okay, isn`t it?

--three, four.

Let it out. Good, very good.

You`ve got stains on your carpet.

ls that what you were thinking about,

stains on my carpet?

You can sit up.

Yeah, carpet stains...

...and that l have a 1 4-year-old girl

l barely know living in my house.

Trust me, they`re not so difficult, kids.

You have to make sure

they eat their vegetables...

...don`t stay up too late,

don`t watch too much TV.

Otherwise, just try to be as honest

and open with them as possible.

-As honest and open with them as possible.

-Right?

Right!

l need a check okay on three.

Manager for a check okay on three, please.

The line for that one`s shorter.

No, this one`s better.

We need a price check

on a five-pound bag of Red Delicious.

Dad, hurry! Hurry!

Pygmies!

We`re making spaghetti.

Yeah. Happy times. Happy times.

Here it comes.

The chefs in ltaly say the spaghetti`s

ready if you throw it and it sticks.

Beer.

Cheers.

l don`t know.

-No sauce to go over it?

-lt`s spaghetti alio olio!

And it`s got basil leaves in it.

See the leaves?

Enjoy it.

-Walters?

-Waller. keep the change.

l`m happy now.

-Sure you don`t want something?

-l gotta fly in two hours.

-Where to?

-Phoenix.

A client`s opening an account to bridge

the pound and Euro. l gotta hold his hand.

Would you please heat this up?

-That bad?

-Yeah.

For some folks, money is a foreign film

-To the business at hand.

-To the business at hand.

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