Mean Girls Page #8

The girls have gone wild.

It was full-tilt jungle madness.

And it wasn't going away.

Hey, I pulled these two off each other.

Coach Carr, step away

from the underage girls.

Let me help you down there.

Hell, no! I did not leave

the Southside for this!

Oh, crap! My hair!

All junior girls report to the gymnasium

immediately! Lmmediately!

Have you ever walked up to people

and realized they were just

talking about you?

Have you ever had it happen

I have.

Never in my 14 years as an educator

have I seen such behavior.

And from young ladies.

I got parents calling me on the phone

asking, "Did someone get shot?"

I ought to cancel your Spring Fling.

No!

- No.

- What are we supposed to do?

Now, I'm not gonna do that,

because we've already paid the DJ.

But don't think that I'm not taking

this book seriously.

Coach Carr has fled school property.

Ms. Norbury has been

accused of selling drugs.

Now, what the young ladies

in this grade need

is an attitude makeover.

And you're gonna get it right now.

I don't care how long it takes,

I will keep you here all night.

We can't keep them past 4.

I will keep you here until 4.

Now, what we're gonna try to do

is fix the way you young ladies

relate to each other.

OK? Lady to lady.

So who has a lady problem

that they'd like to talk about?

Yes?

Somebody wrote in that book

that I'm lying about being a virgin

because I use super-jumbo tampons.

But I can't help it if I've got

a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina.

Yeah, I can't do this.

Ms. Norbury.

You're a successful, intelligent,

caring, graceful woman.

I am?

There has to be something

you can say to these young ladies.

Something to help them

with their self-esteem?

It's not a self-esteem problem.

I think they're all pretty

pleased with themselves.

OK.

OK. Everybody close your eyes.

I want you to raise your hand

if you have ever had a girl

say something bad

about you behind your back.

Open your eyes.

Now, close your eyes again.

And this time, I want you to raise

your hand if you have ever

said anything about a friend

behind her back.

Open them.

There's been some

girl-on-girl crime here.

OK. So, what we could do today

is a couple exercises to help you

express your anger in a healthy way.

Let's start over here.

Ms. Norbury had us confront

each other directly

about the things

that were bothering us.

And it seemed like every clique

had its own problems.

You've been acting really stuck-up

ever since you switched to shortfielder.

And Dawn agrees with me.

- Dawn?

- Don't drag me into this,

I'm pitching tomorrow.

OK. Good.

Can I just say that we don't have

a clique problem at this school?

And some of us shouldn't have to take

this workshop, because some of us

are just victims in this situation.

That's probably true.

How many of you

have ever felt personally

victimized by Regina George?

Good. OK, who's next?

Who's next?

Cady.

Do you have anything

you wanna own up to?

Yes.

No.

You never made up a rumor

about anybody?

Just that you sell drugs.

No.

Nothing you want to apologize for?

I couldn't apologize to Ms. Norbury

without getting blamed

for the whole burn book.

No.

I'm really disappointed in you, Cady.

OK, so we're all here

because of this book, right?

Well, I don't know

who wrote this book,

but you all have got to stop

calling each other sluts and whores.

It just makes it OK for guys

to call you sluts and whores.

Who here has ever been called a slut?

OK, everybody up.

Ms. Norbury had us

write out apologies

to people that we'd hurt in our lives.

"Alyssa, I'm sorry I called you

a gap-toothed b*tch.

"It's not your fault

you're so gap-toothed."

"Gretchen,

"I'm sorry I laughed

at you that time you got diarrhea

"at Barnes and Noble.

"And I'm sorry I told everyone about it."

And I'm sorry for repeating it now.

Laura, I don't hate you

because you're fat.

You're fat because I hate you.

I just wish we could all get along

like we used to in middle school.

I wish that I could bake a cake

made out of rainbows and smiles,

and we'd all eat it and be happy.

She doesn't even go here!

Do you even go to this school?

No. I just have a lot of feelings.

OK, go home.

Sharon, I think you're doing

a great job.

Thanks. I feel like I'm getting through.

I'm sorry that people

are so jealous of me.

But I can't help it that I'm popular.

Oh, my God! Oh, jeez.

OK, walk it off. Walk it off.

OK. That hurt.

They're OK.

They're OK.

Oh, boy. OK, who's next?

Who's next? Keep it going.

Oh, my God. It's her dream come true,

diving into a big pile of girls.

OK, yeah, I've got an apology.

So I have this friend

who is a new student this year.

And I convinced her that it would be

fun to mess up Regina George's life.

So I had her pretend

to be friends with Regina,

and then she would come

to my house after

and we would just laugh about

all the dumb stuff Regina said.

And we gave her

these candy bar things

that would make her gain weight,

and we turned her best friends

against her.

And then... Oh, yeah, Cady...

You know my friend Cady.

She made out

with Regina's boyfriend

and then convinced him

to break up with her.

Oh, God, and we gave you foot cream

instead of face wash.

God! I am so sorry, Regina.

Really, I don't know why I did it.

I guess it's probably because

I've got a big lesbian crush on you.

Suck on that!

Janis! Janis! Janis! Janis!

Regina!

Regina, wait! I didn't mean

for that to happen.

To find out that everyone hates me?

I don't care.

Regina, please! Regina, stop!

No! Do you know

what everyone says about you?

They say that you're

a home-schooled jungle freak,

who's a less-hot version of me.

Yeah. So don't try to act so innocent.

You can take that fake apology

and shove it right up your hairy...

And that's how Regina George died.

No, I'm totally kidding.

But she did get hurt.

Some girls say they saw her head

go all the way around.

But that's just a rumor.

Some people swear they saw me

push her in front of the bus.

That was an even worse rumor.

- Everybody done?

- No. Mom, I didn't do it.

I don't know what to believe anymore.

Mom, believe me.

I'm your daughter.

Why are my tribal vases

under the sink?

My tribal vases.

Why were they under the sink?

I don't know.

This is the fertility vase

of the Ndebele tribe.

- Does that mean anything to you?

- No.

Who are you?

Great. All my friends hate me,

and now my mom hates me.

Your mom does not hate you.

She's afraid of you.

I don't know, maybe we

mainstream-schooled you too soon.

Maybe you should come back and

be home-schooled again for a while.

No. Only thing worse than

going back will be not going back.

How bad's it gonna be tomorrow?

Remember when we saw those lions

fighting over the wart hog carcass?

I'll be the wart hog.

You're not a wart hog,

you're a lion.

Just focus on your studies

for a little while.

You're still an excellent student, right?

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