Meet My Valentine Page #5

You stop paddling,

you drown.

Im breathing

just fine.

Yeah.

I do get tired

sometimes.

I wish I didnt

have to be that way.

You dont.

You could talk

to me.

Talk to me.

- Yeah...

-( knocking on door )

Ahem.

( knocking on door )

- Michael.

- Tom.

- Val:
Mike?

- Hey, come in. Come on.

Thanks.

Whew.

Oh, my God.

Is something wrong?

Oh, no. No, no.

Um...

you left your phone

at the restaurant,

so I just didnt

want you to worry.

I put Saran Wrap

on it.

Mike, I could have gone

a day without my phone.

Or just use

the Find My iPhone app.

The-- come on, Val.

It was in the manual.

We can track

our phones.

Ah-choo!

Did you

drive down here

with the top open?

Um-- ah-choo!

Mm.

Tops broken.

Mike.

- Thank you.

- Just--

Its no problem.

I just didnt

want you to worry

and you needed it

and then an accident

happened

and you didnt have it

or something, so...

I, uh...

just...

Okay, Im gonna go back

to the restaurant.

- Ill drive you.

- No, Im good.

Its-- its letting up.

( thunder rumbles )

Yeah.

Okay...

this is the point

in the date

where I like

to give the speech.

"I would like

to introduce you to my wife.

She is young,

shes beautiful,

and pretty soon,

shes going to be

a widow.

I havent

told her this yet,

but every doctor

that I have talked to

has told me

the same thing--

nine months to a year.

And when that happens,

Valentine is

going to be alone.

Youre dying?

Youre dying.

( sighs )

Man, Im so sorry.

Do you like her?

Do I like

your wife?

Sure.

I mean, we get along

great at work.

Shes terrific.

I mean,

shes a genius.

Really,

this restaurants

just gonna...

( whistles )

take off, but...

Yeah,

I like her, Tom.

Shes the whole package,

but you know that.

Thats why

you married her.

Were friends.

I mean...

maybe

under different

circumstances--

Wait. How would you

want to meet her

under "different

circumstances"?

If I said yes,

which Im not,

how would this work?

You, me, and Val

would spend time together,

and I would watch

the two of you together,

and if it felt right...

then I would

introduce you to Phoebe.

And if my baby girl

thinks

youre the best thing

since Hanson Carter,

- then...

- Then what?

( laughs )

Then you would

just hand over the keys

to your house?

Then I would tell Val...

how I feel--

tell her that I like you,

plant the seeds.

Whew. Okay.

What about Val?

- Does she know

about any of this?

- No.

She doesnt,

and I would like

to keep it that way,

- even after.

- This is so out there, Tom.

I mean,

Im truly sorry

for your situation,

I am, but...

this has "disaster"

written all over it.

Let me show you

something.

You film me

one more time...

- ( Tom laughs )

- No, okay.

Um, uh, okay!

- Phoebe:
You ready?

-Were ready.

Val:
No, no.

On the count of three!

- Tom:
Okay.

- Val:
Okay.

Val, Tom:

1, 2, 3.

Val:

Here comes the bride

All dressed

in white...

Vals wedding dress.

( humming )

Phoebe wanted to feel

like a bride.

Val:

Let me see your

shoes and the veil.

( both humming )

( mock British accent )

Oh, perfect, darling.

Oh, gorgeous.

Daddy,

put the camera down.

You have

to give me away.

I had to stop,

because...

Im never

gonna see that.

Michael...

the thing that I have

figured out from all this

is if you have

a chance

to love somebody,

you gotta take it...

and hold on to it.

You cant take it

for granted.

Dont tell me

you dont want this,

because youll live

to regret it or worse.

( sighs )

So how do we do this?

- Tom:
Welcome

to the dream date.

-( laughter )

- Tom:
You heard it.

- Val:
All right.

- Whats up, Mac?

- Mike:
What you got?

- Tom:
Anytime.

- This is killing me.

- Hmm.

- Brynn:
Babe...

Not bad.

Not bad at all.

Not great at all.

So you guys do this

every Friday night?

Yeah.

Really? Thats cool.

Thank you for inviting me.

Thanks for coming, man.

- Youre up.

- Im up.

Im up.

Oh, I got this.

Bear with me.

Val:

What?

Brynn:

Oh.

-What?

- "Zizivah."

- "Zizivah"?

-Its a type of weevil.

A weevils

a kind of beetle.

There are kinds

of beetles?

Yeah.

Tom:

And you know this?

I cant even

count that high.

This actually

reminds me

of Esteban

trying to cut an onion.

"Valentine..."

"Valentine, I think

I cut my thumb off again."

( laughter )

Thats

actually funny.

You know,

if you cursed more,

I think you

could open for me.

Thanks, man.

- Whos Esteban?

- Val:
Hes--

He does it a lot.

Esteban is great

at start-ups,

bad at slicing.

Okay.

Your turn.

( Val groans )

( Mike speaking faintly )

I learned this.

Its called the slide.

You learn well.

That is perfect.

Mike:

Pretty, right?

( rattling )

Mike:

No, you didnt!

( laughter )

- Mike:
Terrible.

- Val:
Terrible.

Hey.

Hi. Hi.

You scared me.

We got it.

We got this. Come on.

Ill walk you out.

- All right.

- Okay.

Um, thank you

for a lovely evening,

- and Ill see you Monday.

- Thank you.

- I had fun. This was fun.

- Me, too.

Okay. Bye.

You were so right!

I just had to loosen up

and-- and be myself

and try not to think

about how weird

this whole thing is

so I can actually

have a good time.

Shes not yours yet.

Excuse me?

Shes still my wife.

I know.

I was just saying--

No, Im just

saying that as long

as Im still alive,

you keep things

respectful, okay?

You know,

I-- I dont get you.

You talk me

into this thing,

and then when it goes

the way that you want,

you all of a sudden

cant handle it.

I can handle it fine.

I just dont want you to--

You dont want what?

You dont want what?

You dont want me

beating you at Scrabble,

cleaning up bottles?

Tom, you have--

you have

such a wonderful wife.

Yeah, I know

how great she is.

Do you?

Do you know

how great she is?

Listen...

you either want this,

or you dont, okay?

If you want to stop this,

then Ill respect you,

but you need to make

your mind up, damn it.

Cause every moment

that I spend with her,

Im greedy for another.

( car door slams )

( engine starts )

Michael,

wait up a second.

( waves crashing )

I cant believe

Im out with my guy

on Valentines Day.

- Mm-hmm.

- Nice.

Mm-hmm.

Where are we?

I found this great,

little out-of-the-way place.

Its brand-new,

was supposed to be closed,

but I have an in

with the owners, so...

Oh, Tom, the chefs

and the waiters and--

Ah, they were

more than happy

to do it. Trust me.

Hm... whats

the name of it?

( chuckles )

You really have

no sense of direction.

What am I supposed--

am I supposed to know

where I am right now?

Here.

What is--?

What?

- This is your gift.

- I dont understand.

( clicks )

( gasps )

I...

Biron represents

a glassblower who

needed the money.

It was kind of

a last-minute thing.

Michael and I rigged it up

this morning.

If you want to

change the font or

any part of it, we can--

Its-- its

perfect.

Michael-- did you

talk to Mike?

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

He thought

it was a great idea.

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