Melvin and Howard Page #3

- Yeah?

- I'm reading The Magic Of Believing.

- What's that?

- It's about you.

- Oh, all right.

It says that you can be

anything that you wanna be,

but you just have to

believe in yourself.

You believe in yourself, it's just that

the believing has not been enough

to let you become

what you believe you can be.

Well, they didn't burn down Rome

in one day. You gotta keep pluggin'.

Yeah. Well, I've been thinking.

I haven't been very good to you.

I haven't believed in you

like you believe in you.

Well, how about this?

How does computer programming sound?

- I've been reading this book about it.

- Computer programming.

Real estate, insurance.

Anything but bagging magnesium.

Yeah.

- Do you really wanna marry me again?

- I've been missing you.

How about it?

[Toilet flushes]

Hurry up, Mom.

[Toilet flushes]

- They're waitin', Mom.

- I know.

Something stinks in here.

- It's the disinfectant.

- Oh.

How do I look?

Fat.

- I do, don't I?

- But nice.

- You look real good.

- Really?

- Yeah.

- Promise?

- OK.

- I got it.

- Really?

- Yeah, you look real good.

- [Melvin] Dress looks good.

- Really?

You guys are getting married

just in time.

[Lynda] Shut up, Red!

[Darcy] I can't believe

my parents are getting married again!

Will you guys hurry up?

- [Lynda] The car looks great.

- [Darcy] Come on!

Hi, we're the Dummars.

The Dummar family.

- Not yet you're the Dummars.

- We're getting married again.

- Would you like a veil?

- Oh, yeah. How much are they?

- Five dollars.

- No!

- We'll take one.

- No, Melvin!

Melvin, five dollars...

[inaudible]

Well, we'll have a veil.

But I want a blue one to match my suit.

Good.

- Nice, huh?

- Yeah.

- [Darcy] Wow.

- [Red] Pretty.

- [Manager] And on the music?

- What do you have?

Well, I got inspirational, Because.

Hawaiian, The War Chant.

- War Ch...

- Because.

- [Darcy] War Chant.

- [Red] War Chant.

War Chant.

Hawaiian War Chant.

Very good.

That'll be $5 on the veil,

$5 on the music,

$15 on the ceremony,

$4 dollars on the licence,

and $10 on the witnesses.

That's $39 dollars all together.

"The Dummars."

Let see...

Right, that's 39 out of 40.

Thank you.

It doesn't leave us much

for breakfast, does it?

See, I didn't count on the witnesses.

- Witnesses...

- They gotta eat too, know what I mean?

Right this way.

- Here we go.

- Oh, Melvin, I'm palpitating.

[# Hawaiian War Chant]

...death do us part.

Till death do us part.

Till death do us part.

Till death do us part.

Lynda, Melvin,

I now pronounce you man and wife.

[# Hawaiian War Chant]

- Well, this is it, Melvin.

- Yeah.

[Manager] Nice. Real nice.

[Clears throat]

[Laughter]

- [Witness] I wish you happiness.

- [Lynda] Thank you.

[Witness] Oh...! Oh...!

Are you all right, George?

Hal!

Hey, I'm sorry.

I'd better get him home.

Hal, we need some help.

[Groans loudly]

Hal, pay him off.

I'm awful sorry.

Now what am I gonna do?

I got three couples coming in at 11.

Maybe we should talk about that.

[# Hawaiian War Chant]

Oh, boy.

[Hubbub of voices and machines]

- Come on.

- Come on, baby.

Gimme a big ten!

Come on, ten!

- Ten! Ten!

- Come on, ten!

[All] Aww!

That's all right,

don't worry about it. It's OK.

Come on, let's go.

- Twenty!

- Come on, twenty!

[Man] Come on, you guys!

What is this, a vacation?

Let's go! You're not gonna

make no money at that pace.

[Indistinct voices]

Hey, Melvin, let's see that

Milkman of the Month form.

- Howdy, Melvin.

- Hey.

- Mornin', Melvin.

- Hi, Pete.

There's 225 this time, Bonnie.

Really.

- 225 is right.

- See? I'm gonna win that TV.

- I'm gonna be Milkman of the Month.

- You're in the lead.

Wanna know somethin'?

I'm rootin' for you.

- Are you married, Bonnie?

- Hey, Melvin.

- Listen, you're doing a real good job.

- Well, thank you.

Only thing is, remember that engine

you blowed up your first week?

Not now, fellas.

I talked to Mr Rockwood. The only thing

we can figure out to do is deduct it.

- What?! Now, wait a minute.

- We'll take it real slow, make it easy.

Few dollars a week,

you won't even feel it.

It wasn't my fault. The truck was

a piece ofjunk when you gave it to me.

You signed the note, Melvin.

I'm on the top of the list to win the

Zenith 190K with triple scope screen.

Look, Melvin.

Look, Melvin, what can I tell you?

We base Milkman of the Month on the net.

With these deductions,

I don't see you in the running.

No, that's my TV, understand.

For my wife and my kids.

- I'm gonna be Milkman of...

- Let go!

You let go or you don't

come back here tomorrow.

Well, what about it, huh?

Come on, am I

Milkman of the Month or not?!

- Yeah, you're Milkman of the Month.

- I get the TV set, too?

Yeah, you get the set.

Well, then, go ahead

and deduct whatever you want.

You know it.

Hey... You hungry?

[Gurgles]

He's so cute.

I just love him.

[Bicycle bell rings]

[# The Bait Brothers: Shake The Ground]

# If you got the time

Come on and jump and shout

# Come onl

# If you feel the rhythm

Come on and beat it out

# Shake the ground

Shake the ground

# Shake the ground

Shake the ground

# Shake the ground... #

Hey, everybody.

- Hey, Dad.

- What's that you're drinking?

Just a little brandy.

They repossessed the car today.

Us guys have got to stick together.

- Did you hear me?

- Yeah, I heard you.

Right in the parking lot,

outside K-Mart.

Oh, that's all right.

- Sure.

- What's for supper tonight?

Bell peppers.

Lynda, you know

I don't like bell peppers.

- I got bell peppers.

- [Darcy] Shh!

It's the Gateway to Easy Street.

Gate Number Two.

- [TV] Which gate do you want?

- [Darcy] It's gonna be two.

- One. It's gonna be one.

- Two.

- Three.

- Two!

- [Mom] Two!

- [Darcy] Come on!

- Three!

- One!

- [Darcy] Two!

- [TV] Number Onel

- See?

- [TV] Gate Number One.

Every time.

...smooth skiing pleasure

for up to four people.

Powered by Hardin Marine.

Features moulded fibreglass...

Wow!

...horse-power engine.

Retails for $12,000I

$12,000!

When you get up there to the gateway,

just keep betting up, OK?

Come on. Don't settle for nothin'!

If we're ahead a few hundred dollars?

Think what we could do.

Try a few thousand on for size.

We could be in Hawaii with cash besides.

Don't worry, just be brave, baby.

- "Baby"?

- Yeah, this is show business.

[Drum roll and fanfare]

And now, ladies and gentlemen,

the star of Easy Street,

Wally "Mr Love" Williams!

Don't stop, keep that love comin' in!

OK, you know how it works.

I won't bother you with silly rules.

Love is what it's about.

We have acts, you judge 'em.

If they go back to squalor and

poverty row, it's your fault not mine.

If you love 'em,

they go on maybe to fame and fortune.

The show is all about love, so without

further ado, let's get more love.

- Tell us, Freddy, who's our next guest?

- From Anaheim, California...

- Lovely Lynda Dummar!

- [Wally] Lynda Dummar, where are you?!

[Wally] Come on down, Lynda.

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