Men in Black Page #25

ZED is in his office.

ZED:

Containment may be a moot point, my

friend.

The exodus continues. It's like the party's over and the

last one to leave gets stuck with the check.

Zed looks down to the vast floor below and sees the four

worm guys with suitcases walking across the floor.

ZED:

You sorry little ingrates!

KAY (O.S.)

What about the Arquillians?

ZED:

We've only translated a part of the

message so far:
"Deliver the Galaxy."

KAY (O.S.)

No, they don't want much, do they?

ZED:

Oh, it gets better... They're holding

us responsible.

He looks up at the screen. It reads:

MIB:

DELIVER THE GALAXY.

ZED:

Another contestant has entered the

ring.

EXT. NEW YORK STREET (OUTSIDE JEWELRY STORE)

As Kay puts away his phone, turns to Jay

KAY:

All right, kid. The Arquillians want

the galaxy, whatever the hell that

means. We need help. A professional.

Someone with years of experience in

intergalactic politics. I just hope

the little prick hasn't skipped town.

CUT TO:

EXT. UPTOWN NEWSSTAND - DAY

The tow truck SQUEALS to a halt at a curb. EDGAR gets out

and walks away, fast, CURSING under his breath. He rants,

livid, thinking hard. As he passes a newsstand, he grabs the

NEWS VENDOR by the collar.

EDGAR:

Where do you keep your dead?

VENDOR:

(thinks)

I don't have any dead.

EDGAR:

Where?!

VENDOR:

I don't know, the city morgue!

Edgar shoves him away roughly. But before he leaves, his eye

catches a postcard display marked "LANDMARKS OF THE NEW YORK

CITY AREA." Edgar stares, fascinated, but we don't see what

he's looking at. He reaches out and picks up a color postcard.

He raises it to his face, thinking, then shoves it in his

pocket and hurries off.

CUT TO:

EXT. STREET - KEY KIOSK - DAY

Kay's LTD SCREECHES to a halt in front of the kiosk on Orchard

Street. JAY and KAY leap out and Jay spots the VENDOR, closing

up the shop. He's wearing a dirty cardigan, watch cap, and

fingerless gloves, his face aquiver with ticks and mannerisms.

He has a small dog in front of him.

Jay rolls his eyes as they step up to the counter.

JAY:

Of course that guy's an alien. That's

gotta be the worst disguise I've

ever seen.

A voice answers him, but not the Vendor's.

FRANK THE PUG:

You don't like it, you can kiss my

furry little butt.

Jay looks down. The voice is coming from the dog. This is

FRANK THE PUG.

Kay approaches, motioning to Jay to make sure no one hears.

KAY:

You busy, Frank?

FRANK THE PUG:

Sorry, Kay, I can't talk right now,

my ride's leaving in --

Kay grabs Frank. He yelps like, well, a dog.

KAY:

Call the pound. We got a stray.

FRANK THE PUG:

Hey! Get your paws off me!

PASSERBYS glare at Kay, who appears to be seriously

mistreating this poor little dog. Jay tries to explain.

JAY:

The, uh... dog owes my friend some

money.

KAY:

(to Frank)

Arquillians and bugs. What do you

know?

FRANK THE PUG:

I know nothing.

KAY:

Not a thing?

Kay shakes Frank the Pug, trying to force an answer.

FRANK THE PUG:

Stop it. Okay, okay. Rosenberg wasn't

some two-bit Arquillian. He was the

guardian of a galaxy. They thought

he would be safe here on earth.

KAY:

And the bug had other plans.

FRANK THE PUG:

The galaxy is the best source for

subatomic energy in the universe. If

the bugs get their slimy claws on

it, kiss the Arquillians goodbye.

JAY:

Ask him about the belt.

KAY:

(to Frank)

Rosenberg said something about a

galaxy on "Orion's belt." What's he

talking about, Frank?

FRANK THE PUG:

Beats me.

Kay shakes Frank the Pug once more.

JAY:

(to a person passing

by)

They're rehearsing a ventriloquist

act.

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