Money From Home Page #3

as a shock to you,

but I can't trust

my pants anymore.

What are you doin'?

It's been a very, very

nice trip, Honey Talk.

Thanks very much.

Here, you can't

run out on me, now.

Haven't you got any dough left?

No! Now can I run out on you?

Well, if you do, it'll

be curtains for me.

Curtains.

I'll get us to Maryland yet.

Come on.

What do you mean curtains

for you, Honey Talk?

Something smells

awful fishy around here

and you're acting

like a barracuda.

Give me the bags.

What are you doin'?

What are you gonna do?

What are you doin' that for?

Get out of the way. Come.

Special train, Number 15.

I don't wanna do this,

Honey Talk!

Excuse me, lady.

I'm no lady!

Sorry, sir, but passengers

aren't allowed in that car.

It's reserved for the Poojah

of Bahloop and his entourage.

Honey Talk!

Honey Talk!

What's the matter with you?

Honey Talk, you've gotta

get me out of here!

There's lady girls

in here undressed!

Inside!

His Exalted Worthiness

desires a wife.

Enter.

How spirited!

You're the one I choose.

The rest go. Go! Go!

Your shyness is charming.

But before you reveal yourself

to me, you must dance again.

And by the degree

of your grace,

let me surmise your identity.

Faster! Faster!

Faster! Faster!

That's enough, my spirited one!

Now, my fragrant flower,

come to me.

Come.

Then I come to you.

Come, come, come, come.

Come here, little one.

Come here.

Yes, I'm going to catch you.

So exciting!

You will be among my favorites.

Love is the same

all over the world

No one lives without it

No matter where you are

In Singapore or Zanzibar,

a kiss is a kiss

Papa needs a Mama

For love is in the air

everywhere

In the strangest places

where they cover up

their faces

Love still finds a way

Why, there's even someone

making with the wooing

In the ruins of Pompeii

Love is the same

It doesn't matter, sister,

how you say it

It's the same

all over the world

Stop! Stop!

His Worthiness

desires another wife!

Come quickly! All of you!

Quick! Quick! Quick!

Now, get in here.

Why, you idiot!

What were you doin' out there?

What was I supposed to do?

I wasn't even married to him.

Get in here.

You're gonna get

us into trouble,

foolin' around with

the mail like that!

I'm gonna get us into trouble?

We are in trouble!

Bye.

What are you doin'?

I'm taking inventory. I have a

feeling something's missing.

And I know I sacroed my iliac.

Now, come on, we got a long

way to get to Tarrytown.

No, I'm gonna sit down.

I'm tired and hot and hungry

and homesick and thirsty.

And I'm very, very upset

with you, Honey Talk Nelson.

Put your veil on!

Here comes a car.

Come on, our worries

are practically over.

Yeah? Wait till he

finds out I'm a boy.

Thank you for stoppin'.

Well, that's quite all right.

And how are you, my dear?

Oh, I'm fine, thank

I'm a boy!

How very odd.

Well, if you'll excuse me.

You talk like a foreigner.

Are you a foreigner?

Only in this country. Oh.

Haven't I seen

your picture somewhere?

Oh, quite possibly.

I am Bertie Searles.

Sure. Bertie Searles!

You're the famous steeplechase

jockey from England.

Oh. Well, I am

a leading gentleman rider,

if that's what you mean, sir.

I am on my way to Tarrytown

to ride My Sheba

in the Gold Vase Steeplechase.

My Sheba. That's right.

You came all the way from

England across the water?

That is the only

way one can get here.

Oh, yes... Oh, hush, Virge.

Would you give us

a lift in to Tarrytown?

Why, certainly, old boy,

if you know where it is.

I've been lost for days.

Well, step right in the

back, Mr. Searles.

Oh, that's very nice of you.

We'll get you to Tarrytown all refreshed

and in time for the big race.

Thank you. Tell me,

is this the way people

dress here in America?

Oh, no, this was the only way

we could get on the train.

Virge!

Well, you see we were

at a masquerade ball

and we've been out all night

and somebody stole

our bicycles,

so we're thumbin' our way

into Tarrytown.

Oh, very jolly, indeed.

Yeah, that's how it happened.

Actually, we had the bikes

right outside the place...

Oh, magnificent countryside.

I say, a bit of luck bumping

into you chaps, eh?

Cheerio.

By the way, Mr. Searles,

do you have any extra threads

that we could borrow

till we get to the hotel?

Threads?

You know, clothes.

Dear old boy, this bag is absolutely

chock-a-block. Help yourself.

There you are,

something for everyone.

Oh, thank you.

This is fine for you,

Honey Talk.

Look! My school colors!

Come landlord fill the flowing

bowl until it doth run over

For tonight

we'll merry, merry be

Tomorrow we'll be sober

Well, not a bad-looking hotel

for a one horse town.

And there's the one horse.

Gee, she's a pretty one.

Oh, forget the horse and help

me with Bertie and the bags.

I'll be right back.

Hey!

Oh, Admiral, you mind

helping me with my friend?

He's a little

under the weather.

Is he carsick?

Yeah, he's been

drinking gasoline.

Now just grab his legs.

That's it. Here, I'll

put him in your arms.

Watch it.

Now, take it easy

with him, Commodore.

That's the famous

Bertie Searles.

Take him straight up

to his room.

I beg your pardon, but... Well!

Did I understand you to say...

Shh. Don't say a word.

Not a sound.

No one ever heard

the Mona Lisa speak.

Venus de Milo doesn't talk.

And you're a work of art.

So just stand there and let the

patron of the arts patronize you.

Now, look,

I heard you tell the doorman

that was Bertie Searles.

I was just going to

check on his arrival.

Who are you?

Who am I?

I'm Romeo and you're Juliet.

Climb down, Romeo!

Wrong balcony!

I'm the owner of My Sheba.

Mr. Searles is in my employ.

You're Phyllis Leigh? Yes.

Well, I'm sorry.

I beg your pardon. I'm...

I'm H.T. Nelson,

Bertie's American agent.

I'm very glad

to know you, Miss Leigh.

I didn't know

he had an agent here.

Oh, yes.

We dealt with each other direct,

on the transatlantic phone.

Well, that's because

I was out of town,

Jamaica, the island,

not the race track.

But don't you worry

about Bertie.

He'll be all right.

Little carsick.

Oh, that's too bad.

But that's enough about us,

let's talk about you.

Shall we say over

a chocolate sundae?

No? No. No, thanks.

I have to get back

to the house.

Well, let me drive you there.

Oh, I have my car right here.

Well, I'll take you to it.

Now, you leave

everything to me.

Soon as we check in the hotel,

I'll get Bertie sober...

Back on his feet,

then we'll get together

and have a nice talk and

straighten everything out.

Suppose I call you in an hour?

I'll be waiting.

Bye, Mr. Nelson.

Auf Wiedersehen, Miss Leigh.

Now, Virge, this Leigh

doll doesn't know

what Bertie Searles looks like.

And it's just as well,

because he's in no

condition to meet a doll

who's pinning her hopes

on him winning $50,000...

Virge, what are you doin'?

Feedin' the moths.

You're feedin' what?

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