Monster Brawl Page #3

---

with a rusty cleaver!

Oh, good Lord! Folks, Herb Dean

has been seriously injured

as he flops out of the ring!

Unbelievable!

Monster Brawl ref Herb Dean

is dead at the age of 40!

And we're going to have to proceed

throughout the rest of the night

with no officiator, Sid.

Look, no more grieving, Buzz.

We're missing the action

in the ring.

And the Cyclops with a heavy blow

to the head of Witch B*tch,

sending her into the turnbuckle

where he lets loose a couple

of heavy punches.

And Witch B*tch with a sneaky

dodge as she batters Cyclops with

a shoulder to the chest.

Cyclops grabs Witch

B*tch by the neck.

Fantastic.

And a sensational reversal

by Witch B*tch.

And Buzz, the Grub hands her a bottle

of moonshine or something

and she's happily indulging in it.

She's bitching up for

something big, Sid.

And the Witch humiliating

the Cyclops

as she spews that B*tch's

brew all over him.

Look out! She's going

in for an eye-gouge.

Cyclops in serious danger now

as Witch B*tch pries at

his exposed eyeball.

It's all fun and games until

someone loses their eye.

And the Cyclops is going nuts!

He's amassing an energy force

around his eyeball.

Cyclops possesses powers

older than time itself,

and he was hesitant to use this

weapon, but enough is enough.

It's time for this b*tch to pay!

And Cyclops unloads a devastating

laser beam attack,

scorching the face of Witch B*tch!

That was a face-melting finish.

Wow!

Cyclops wins.

Mythical laser blast.

Ding dong, the Witch is dead.

She'll find a final resting place

here at Hillside Necropolis.

Cyclops parades around the ring,

basking in the victory.

Cyclops wins!

And now the Grub enters the ring to

steal some thunder from Cyclops.

He wants a piece of the

one-eyed monster.

Oh, my God! The Grub gets his

head knocked right off

as Cyclops unloads a heavy blow

that literally decapitates

the veteran monster manager.

Hades! You're next!

I Love this! I Love it!

I Love it! I Love it!

Look at this. Cyclops just scorched

Witch B*tch with a laser beam!

And look at Herb Dean. He's dead!

I hate referees anyhow. They

are no use for anything.

Trust me on that, girls. And the

winner of the match is Cyclops!

A convincing win for the Cyclops,

as he takes the crown for the Creature

Conference middleweight title.

That's right, Buzz. The dead are

gone, and the Brawl must go on.

We'll be right back to preview

our next fight,

this time from the

Undead Conference.

Metropolitan Museum, New York City.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,

this is Chris Chilton

with a special B Channel News alert

for the Greater New York area.

Authorities have confirmed that

a reanimated mummy has escaped

from the Metropolitan Museum after

killing a forklift operator.

Experts believe the mummy might be

the fabled 4000-year-old remains

of King Khafra, a brutal

and vicious Pharaoh.

The entire Tri-state area is now

under an orange terror alert

as the undead monster roams

the streets aimlessly.

Our cameras caught up with

the Sheriff in front of the

museum earlier today.

It's our belief that he's

headed somewhere.

Something evil has compelled

him from the grave.

I encourage all citizens

to remain on high alert.

And if you see that mummy, you all

give me a call now, you hear?

Felldorf, Transylvania.

This is special agent

Laurence Dunn,

voice memorandum 19F81.

Operation Holy Water.

I have succeeded at traversing

the Carpathian Mountains

over the last nine days,

and I have arrived at a mysterious

and seemingly abandoned estate

not far from the village

of Felldorf.

The local peasants implored

me not to go any further,

saying that the land is unhallowed.

And there have been several recent

killings by a murderer in the night.

The villagers said things that have

happened here must not be known.

After I heard enough

of their Gypsy crap,

I followed the trail hard to

have a look for myself.

That trail ends here.

Madam, I'm agent Laurence Dunn.

I need to ask you a few questions.

Excuse me, is that blood

you're drinking?

This estate originally belonged

to Vlad the Impaler.

Is that correct?

How long have you lived here?

Forever.

I'm the last of my kind.

Doomed to immortality.

The villagers have accused

you of murder.

I have to take you in.

Undead Conference Middleweight

Title Match.

Lady Vampire vs. the Mummy.

Welcome back to the program, folks.

I'm Buzz Chambers, here with

living legend Sasquatch Sid,

and we're set for the next

fight of the evening,

this one featuring

two undead icons.

Lady Vampire.

I dream of a glorious death,

but no monster is a match

for the eternal one.

The Mummy will be destroyed.

Lady Vampire has a lifetime record

that has spanned over six centuries,

dating back to the year 1381.

She's virtually immortal.

And an expert with XIV

century fisticuffs.

She's a cold-blooded

professional killer,

and I hope the Mummy is carrying

some garlic or holy water, Buzz,

'cause this is a bit of a mismatch.

Lady Vampire is a big favorite

going into this brawl.

The Mummy.

Although feeble and frail,

the Mummy presents an interesting

challenge to Lady Vampire.

As an Egyptian Pharaoh,

he must have undergone some form of

military training in his past life.

Regardless, we expect

to see a lifeless,

shuffling wraith in action tonight.

His bandages might be battered

and bedraggled,

and his skeletal interior

very vulnerable,

but mark my words, people.

We're dealing with a former

tyrant of ancient Egypt,

and he's gotta have a couple

of tricks up his sleeve.

It's time for the Undead Conference

Middleweight Division title match.

Introducing first, weighing

in at 127 pounds,

from the far outreaches of the

Carpathian Mountains in Transylvania,

the eternal champion of blood lust,

Lady Vampire!

And her opponent, from the

Valley of the Kings,

the Hexecutioner, the rotten

wraith of the ring,

the cursed, snake-bitten,

King Khafra, the Mummy!

I gotta say, I'm pulling for the

Vampire in this fight, Sid.

I'll be damned before

I cheer for a mummy.

I've hated mummies my whole life.

And taking a look at

these numbers, Buzz,

the fighters line up very

closely with one another,

both being ancient undead icons

with very similar vital stats.

Strap yourself in, Sasquatch Sid.

We're set for this unspeakable

undead ultimatum.

For the winner, the middleweight

Conference Championship.

For the vanquished,

a bitter harvest.

And we're in for some extreme

undead action here, Buzz.

Two ancient adversaries meeting

in bloody battle for

the first and only time.

And the combatants lock up

in the center of the ring.

She goes to town on

his battered torso,

delivering a torrent of kicks to

the frail frame of the Mummy.

And the Mummy with a retaliatory

headbutt.

And the Mummy starting

to show signs of life.

That was an aggressive body-slam

by the mangled monarch.

And he throws in a big kick

to the gut of Lady Vampire

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes