Monsters Wanted Page #8

I don't know

where the fire exits are.

His phone's up here.

You told me an exit sign

was up!

There's no exit sign up!

- I handed those

to Matt earlier.

- I told you--

I told you, hell,

Matt has enough stuff

to do.

[Sympathy for the devil's

little helper by viva viva]

- no lie

high and dry

no lie

high and dry

no lie

high and dry

no lie

high and dry

no lie

high and dry

- what's this?

- Will call window.

This goes over the window

that leads to the picnic tables

under the awning.

These two go on the wall.

- And how am I supposed to be

in charge of this sh*t?

- I don't know. Kenny told me

to give it to you.

- God damn it.

- Yeah, I'll point out

where they go.

- I got it, honey.

- Hey, rich,

can you do me a favor

and tell Pete to leave me alone?

- No.

- We've only got a few more

hours before it opens,

so, um, really, there's way

too much work to be done

in one day

and not enough people,

and everybody's frustrated,

which isn't helping.

Everybody's

a little stressed out.

- I still have, like,

30 more things to do

before we open.

Just gotta make sure

this fits.

- Oh, you gotta be

kidding me.

- Just gotta hit it

with a hammer.

- We open in...

About an hour and a half

or less.

- Think so?

- Okay, if you do not have

your costumes for darkness,

come with me.

- This is unwashed

for three days

to give it

the proper effect.

- Mmm.

- It smells so good.

- How are things going

back here?

- Move that this way

so that these will come closer.

Can we?

Right there.

Hey, Kenny, can you figure out

time warping for me real quick,

go back a week?

- I know.

- I have no air here

or power yet.

- This box?

- Yeah.

Slide it under.

Slide it under.

Yeah, it'll reach.

I'll be back in three seconds.

Thank you.

- What am I doing?

[Indistinct chatter]

- I-I can't give you

a percentage

of what the--how much

we're gonna be ready

and what's not

gonna be ready, so...

All these dead-looking people

around here.

Oh, yeah, we're doing

a haunted house.

- Hey, zombie city, I think

we're gonna do a test run.

It's just gonna be me

and Brian coming through.

James, you gonna

give me the rules?

- Okeydokey.

Enter at your own risk.

By entering

the quarantine zone,

you assume all responsibilities

for your person

and personal possessions.

- Rockabye, baby

on the treetop

when the wind blows

the cradle will...

- [Growling]

- [Laughs]

- Hey, hey, hey, howdy.

How y'all doing today?

Well, I'm the new sheriff

in town,

just in case

y'all were wondering.

Well, since I can't find

my pa,

if you need anything,

please just come find me.

- [Moans]

- Oh, God! Help me!

No! Help me!

- [Humming]

- Ooh, light.

I-I remember.

I remember sunlight.

The sun upon my face,

it used to feel good,

but now I hate it!

- The gods will end

the suffering!

[Banging]

- [Laughing and screaming]

- Freeze!

Freeze! Don't you move!

Don't you move at all!

Are you alive?

Is anyone here alive?

They'll get you, man.

The dogs is f***ing in there.

I'm gonna blow

this goddamn place up high.

- That's good.

Watch your language.

- All right,

I'll watch the language.

- I think they need to

work a little harder

to keep 'em longer.

- Why was no one

in the bus?

- [Coughs]

The actress had to quit.

- We didn't have...

Enough actors.

You know, I thought

we were gonna have enough,

and the next show,

we just didn't.

It's like, really,

we don't have anyone there?

What the hell

are we gonna do?

- One of our main clowns

apparently quit a week ago,

and it didn't get

passed down to us right.

Can you work

in this clown town,

directing in the tunnel

for a little while

till I can find

someone else?

- The barn doesn't have lights.

- Huh?

- The barn

doesn't have lights.

Danny put a flashlight

in there to hold them over.

Matt's on it.

- Well, we're working on it,

trying to get some 12 volt.

- The boys can't get

the chainsaw working

in the support tunnel.

- Well, it's 'cause

they fight it.

We're got customers

coming through.

Our first 50 guests

have gone through.

I'm seriously freaked out

and stressed out

I have way too much

to f***ing do.

[Indistinct crowd chatter]

- Nobody can hear

the music.

I took a radio out there

and they just can't hear it,

so I'm trying to bring it

closer to the stage.

Watch out.

Watch out.

[Overlapping chatter]

- Oh!

- Oops!

- Oh, crap.

- All right.

So you want to be

on this?

- Like this.

Check this out.

- I don't have a choice

right now.

- I've got a big speaker.

- Oh, you do have one?

- Except I need power.

- Okay.

- Uh, we need

two power strips.

Uh, I can't have these.

I can't have these.

- You can't use these?

- No, you need that.

You all look beautiful.

[Music playing]

[Mr. incredible

by sick of sarah]

- pick it up

- [Screaming]

- Hello,

Mr. incredible

[Overlapping shouts]

Please take off

your cape

- Bill wouldn't even move.

There's this--

- yeah. It's nice finding out

what works and what, you know,

what's not gonna work.

- Yeah.

- Well, we don't really have

power in zombie city,

which is one thing.

Like, our lighting over there

is just cars

with, uh, emergency

blinkers on, obviously.

But we have had the problem

with the air compressor

over here freezing up,

which cuts out our animatronics,

which make them go,

and the one that's supposed to

be getting electrocuted,

going, "aah,"

he just goes...

- Sh*t's still not right.

I'm short on lights

and I can't get enough.

- With the lights on

f*** you,

Mr. incredible

- Tonight is fix-it night.

Figure out what's wrong

and we fix it tomorrow.

Yo, my entire job tonight

has been saying,

"hold out until tomorrow.

It'll get better."

- Like, there's a list of stuff

that needs to be fixed,

on top of the lighting

and everything.

- Hmm?

- Out where?

- Yeah, out where?

- Where?

- In darkness?

- There's no one from...

[Overlapping chatter]

- We had one actor.

He had been going

up to all the other actors

and saying,

"I think it's stupid

"that we're not getting

enough breaks.

Come with me."

So some of the sh*t

that got stirred up later

that got blamed on me

was really because

this guy had been going around

and telling people to go,

and they didn't know that

he wasn't a point of authority

and just went.

- We're having a few challenges

with actors in darkness.

- I know.

- I've really got to have

either everybody

in makeup at 7:
45,

or I need everybody at the

back patio for a little bit,

and we need to go over

some sh*t

and squash it tomorrow.

- All right.

- We need to rah-rah 'em

and work on that.

- Yeah, I know.

- And fix the scenery problem.

- How has your first night

been so far?

- I'm having fun.

It's chaos,

but I'm having fun.

- I know.

- Oh, wow.

- Kaley.

Uh, he, uh--we talked

about this earlier today.

- It was with rich.

- Oh, oh, okay.

- And then, uh,

he came up here earlier today.

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