Nestyda Page #2

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-And all those animals...

-I know.

-That was also all kind of weird.

For example the cow,

probably had mad cow disease.

And the donkey...

we all know about donkeys.

The same sort of show-off

as our Oskar.

What does he do now?

He drives drunks home from bars.

He drives their cars.

And that concludes

our block of requests.

This is Zuzana, signing off.

Good night.

Sweetheart, get lost.

I'll meet you at the Owls.

Bounce off the putlog.

I swept it myself.

Sweetheart...

-I hope the bike's clean.

-Sure.

Get lost just a little bit.

Like the sky beyond the wire.

Get lost just a little bit.

Like the sky beyond the wire.

You can make pasta out of salmon.

Or foam.

Steaks, filets.

Or horseshoes.

In the end

it's still salmon, though.

Just as our example here proves.

Man can dress up as anything.

He can be a maid, a stone-mason,

a hunter or just a passer-by.

But if he dresses up as a salmon

he'll still be a d*ckhead.

Great, huh?

I've never seen anything so

embarrassing in my entire life.

Everything that has feathers,

flies.

-A stop light.

-A stop light doesn't fly.

-Mom, have you got a new phone?

-No. Why?

There are fewer numbers. Four.

There are nine numbers there,

just like always.

No, there are four.

Let me see.

Jesus, I'm so stupid.

-No, you're not.

-That's my PIN.

What's a PIN? Is it short

for something, like VIP?

Yeah, it is.

A Pretty Imposing Nose.

Let's go.

Dad, there's some boy

stuck in here.

Here, in the slide.

-Do you hear me?

-What happened?

Hello, excuse me,

my son seems to be stuck.

Hello?

Hi.

Hey, scout,

what are you doing here?

Oh, I see.

It looks bad, mommy.

That boy is really stuck good.

We're going to have to cut it open.

-What?

-Yeah.

Nah.

Hey, I got something

better for you.

Have you ever seen

your mom this small?

-Come down!

-You come up!

When the windows of the first tram

flash their usual signals

to the curtains of my room.

And the sunrise comes

to press the doorknobs

on the keys of accordions,

tunes takes wing.

Someone played under the roof.

Someone was laughing at it...

What's wrong?

Excuse me?

I'm looking at your nose.

You have an amazing nose.

-Yeah?

-Honestly.

-It really suits you.

-Well thank you.

Gorgeous.

My bathtub is full

of violet violets.

It was like that every morning.

And someone unseen, said,

Let the guy have his fun.

Another told his wife though:

A weird attitude towards hygiene.

Because she'll lose her health.

Upstairs the other one played on.

To all the tenants.

Like the wish "break a leg"

he was sending us a message...

-Bye.

-Bye.

Wait.

What if I get lost?

You're a big boy.

Why would you get lost?

One moment.

So do I.

Now hardly anyone will know,

who lived back then

under the eaves

of an old house in Karln.

He just left one morning,

from the flat

that never had a bathtub,

and smelled, at best, of wine.

With the things he played to us,

he lied,

they all said.

l, however bad the weather,

still sing:

My bathtub is full of violets,

my bathtub is full of violets.

My bathtub is full

of violet violets.

-I wrote a poem.

-About that Hungarian?

I don't understand why you don't

sort these things out in a brothel.

Wait, you don't understand.

I'm 42. And I wrote a poem.

And how big is your mortgage?

Twenty thousand.

And you lease your car, too?

How many more times, do you think,

will you fall in love again?

How many more times will you hear

the cracking of shells?

I just don't want it

to be taken away.

-How much is it?

-The lease. Ten.

Has Marie ever offered

to pee on you?

How much did you make in TV?

Thirty thousand.

-And now?

-Probably twenty.

And how much do you want

to pay for Jakub?

At least ten.

So you're twenty thousand

down each month.

I will, of course,

represent you in court,

but you should try to negotiate

a settlement with Zuzana.

I'll listen to the poem next time.

Good evening,

we have a reservation.

-What's the name?

-Roman Hofman.

Yes, here we are.

Good evening.

Very pleased to see you.

Thank you.

And finally here comes

the executioner.

He looks terrible, horrible, man.

The blood is dripping

from his hatchet, you see.

And when we take off his cape

like this...

It's a clown...

So what's the problem?

Does he drink?

-No, he doesn't.

-He doesn't drink. Good.

-Does he smoke?

-No, he doesn't.

He doesn't smoke.

Does he do drugs?

-He's nice.

-There you go.

-He's divorced.

-Those are points in his favour.

And I am married.

So you'll get divorced,

and that's it.

Isn't it kind of hard on Oskar?

Oh come on, he's a complete fool.

-Have you ever cheated on him?

-No, I haven't.

Unfortunately.

I was so absurdly puritanical.

If I wasn't such a puritan,

I'd have slept with every cute guy,

who helped me into the tram

with the baby carriage.

I'll call him later, okay?

No way, girl.

One moment.

Yes?

Yes, I'll pass you her right away.

One second.

Hello? Hi.

Now?Idon't know

if we'll make it on time.

And I have to ask Jakub.

Okay. Bye.

Jesus, I can't squeeze

into a swimsuit in an hour.

Jakub.

They said they'll cut the head off

with a hatchet. They'll saw it off.

Jakub, do you want to go

swimming with Terezka?

No, I prefer the theatre.

Okay, but get dressed and we're off.

She's a real terror, isn't she?

But that's how it is in normal life.

I really don't understand

why she died.

Excuse me. Madam, that dead animal

on your table...

But everyone has

a dead animal on their table!

Don't cry.

I think I'm all burnt out inside.

My homeopath also told me I have

a zinc and selenium deficiency.

Then have steak tartar.

Are you kidding?

I really don't understand

how you can eat meat.

Please, answer me.

Those animals that ran away

from some electrified enclosure

and had the whole of Britain

cheering for them...

what were they aiming for

if not freedom?

Freedom, do you get it?

Look at yourself.

Can you see the bloodthirsty fiend

in your face?

Let me see your teeth.

Fangs.

Do you know

when I became a vegetarian?

When I realized

there's no difference

between a cowshed and Auschwitz.

You mean, you feel that a cowshed

and Auschwitz are the same?

Murder's murder.

In that case, I'll have

a double steak tartar.

Is it worth it?

Listening to that for two hours,

just for ten minutes of...?

It is.

-Mom, please.

-Leave him alone.

You know, what it seems like to me?

Like when you sit on a bus

for two days going to Greece,

then swim in the sea once and

spend another two days getting home.

A great metaphor.

Why do we put ourselves through it?

Maybe I like swimming.

-Are you looking forward

to seeing Jakub? -No.

What? No?

I am.

Look.

-Hi.

-Hi.

-Hi, Jakub. Let's go?

-Okay.

I'll hold you.

I'll jump in again.

Come on.

Come on, don't be scared...

-Bury her.

-Okay.

But choose some beautiful place.

Sunny. She liked the sun.

Okay.

-But promise me.

-I promise.

Does anyone need safe transport?

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