Nestyda Page #3

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Yeah, I do.

Maybe I'm a little drunk.

And maybe I'm all burnt out inside.

And maybe you have a zinc

and selenium deficiency.

Who knows.

You're pretty bold.

I could be your mother,

for God's sake.

I was expecting

something more original.

I could be her grandma.

That's better! Here you go.

Everything alright?

So, where to?

I wrote a poem. For you.

You know, come to think of it,

I've only been happy

twice in my life.

When my dad bought me

my first long pants.

And then...

when you gave me

the three coloured soap

and told me you were my friend.

It's still true.

I am your friend.

Tell me, why am I such a bad

and miserable man.

I can't look at myself anymore.

I'd like to be so different.

ButIdon't know how anymore.

Something's messed up inside me.

I'm probably nuts.

A good day to you, this is Zuzana.

Today, we're going to talk about

how the stars can influence

our relationships.

I think that these things

are overrated.

However, we're interested

in your opinions. After...

But after a song.

Bla bla, am I in love?

It's been nearly a year,

that I've been searching for you

everywhere.

My excuse was a borrowed book.

And with that book under my arm

I ran every day like

someone standing still.

What ifIbumped

into you somewhere?

It happens.

You and your house...

-Kiss.

-Kiss, come on.

-Hi.

-Hi.

Ninety.

I finally have to buy a new door.

Now that I've got

such a good measuring tape.

I don't understand,

whyIdeserve to have you here.

In this empty flat.

Look whatIdiscovered.

We've sung together already.

In 1989.

You were standing

on the balcony in Melantrich

and you were singing the anthem.

I was downstairs.

With a little flag.

I loved you.

This is that little flag.

I don't remember you.

Where were you standing?

On the curb.

You don't remember me?

-No.

-Really?

How is that possible?

I don't know.

-You don't remember me?

-No.

No?

Ah, so that was you,

with the little flag.

Czech country, my homeland.

Czech country, my homeland.

-How about some music, folks?

-Yes, please.

Wait. I'll put on...

No, leave it, I like it.

I like it too.

I'm the little soldier,

my shoes are all torn.

I'm not going to join the army,

untilIhave new ones.

My father heard me,

he came out of his room,

and got me some new shoes,

I had to go to the army.

I'm the little soldier girl

among a lot of soldiers,

there are thousands of them,

and I am all alone.

If there were only

two hundred of those soldiers,

I would stand up to them

like a fearless woman.

I'd like to see some bats.

Or snakes.

In any case, something in the dark.

I see. I love bats too.

Tereza. Jakub.

You wanna go see the bats?

It's too dark in there.

Great.

So how long have you lived here?

We moved because of the child.

Oh, so Zuzana

had been born already?

I'm not quite sure.

Tell me, when did you have

Zuzana's ears pierced?

When she was born, right?

She's got them pierced?

So we probably had them pierced.

Go to sleep.

The kids are asleep.

You may stay here.

Where here?

In the kids' bedroom.

Here you go.

I don't know.

I think I'm a puritan, too.

What a weird situation.

Hey that's life.

I can hear okay.

Exactly.

We wouldn't be Czech music, if we

didn't have a beautiful gift for you.

No more. I can't anymore.

Okay, for the last time.

I have to admit something.

But promise you won't laugh at me.

I can't promise you that.

I'll try not to laugh.

Do you know when I had

my first orgasm with you?

Now? At leastIhope so.

Sooner.

What do you mean sooner?

Already when we were at the bats.

What's wrong?

I haven't had sex for half a year.

Ah. IfIhadn't had sex for six

months I'd cum by the kangaroos.

Why by the kangaroos?

What have you got

against kangaroos?

Got nothing against bats, either.

But your parents

are really funny.

They're not my parents.

Good morning.

Tell... Hello.

Tell Mrs. Nora I'm here.

Hello.

Ms. Nora, there's a...

Are you a driver?

-A driver's here.

-I am not a driver.

I'm a boyfriend.

Sing for me a little longer.

And don't say you can't.

Let me feel this small again.

So that your heart beats for me.

Sing for me just a little

while longer...

Hi, Nora.

Bon appetit.

Sorry to disturb you.

Oh my God.

Roman, when I last saw you,

you were probably only 8 years old.

Just like you Nora,

coochie coochie.

Yes, yes.

Just like your mother.

And there will only be two shadows

left on the wall...

I remember that too.

When you sing,

I feel like I did ages ago

wrapped safely

in my grandma's blanket.

And I'm not worried

about the only thing:

When the holidays are over.

I'd like to introduce you

to my parents.

Goodness, why?

Are we gonna have a baby?

Yeah, that's exactly why.

Your mother could be my sister.

I'm old school.

Karel, what do you think,

should I go there?

Well, I wouldn't recommend it.

When I was young girl,

a long time ago now.

I climbed trees

with the boys.

And always when they broke

a branch on the tree,

they put cherries

under my blouse.

Boys?

They were curious about

what was under my blouse...

I want you to approve of her.

That's all.

So that's what this is about.

You don't want to know

whatIthink?

No. I'm anticipating.

You're anticipating. Jesus.

Hey, it's not necessary to quarrel.

And you're probably right.

I've become an unnecessary person.

Well, she's pretty.

And she's gonna be pretty for ages.

That's right.

If you love her, then she'll

stay pretty until she dies.

That's sweet.

-The eyes.

-He's still handsome.

-What year was that?

-1969.

I think that was when I went to

hear you in the Lucerna music hall.

Look at this.

Here with the doggy.

He's handsome there too, huh?

You have done a pretty good job.

I mean, today must have been

really difficult for you.

If my son did that to me,

I'd probably go crazy.

Who said life is symmetrical?

Look...

"An old barn burns really well!"

"An intimate (dis)connection"

The cherries are ripe

and the blouse is really tight.

A green branch

won't help you at all.

Maybe I'm old. But an old barn

will burn very well.

Now I'd like to invite on stage

someone I've already sung with.

ButIdon't remember it.

That's ok.

It's nice.

-Hi.

-Hi.

-Did you see it?

-I did.

So what do you think about it?

I would call him ifIwere you.

Jesus, why would I call him?

Because that's exactly what people

are interested in, you know.

Thank you. Have a good night.

-Hi, Mimi.

-Hi, Mom.

These are my sons.

All three of you are alcoholics.

So you'll get along great.

I hope.

-You want a beer?

-Or a shot?

Both.

When an ass is all cold.

It's nice and tight, isn't it?

But by far the worst thing

is when their legs aren't shaved

and the hair stick out

through the stockings.

Today every woman should be shaved,

there's no other way.

-Hold on, totally shaved?

-Sure.

I don't like it down there.

I always think that that shaved

p*ssy looks at me in a funny way.

Every decent p*ssy

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