Nice Dreams Page #7

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you wouldn't have enough

to blow your nose, man.

Hope there's no dogs here.

[CHONG HOWLS]

Sh*t.

[CHONG LAUGHING]

Hey, man.

Quit f***ing around, man.

Let's get our money.

I knew that was you.

[CHONG BARKING]

Shut up, man. So stupid.

Oh, that's real funny. Ha.

So funny, I forgot to laugh.

Ow. Ow.

Ow. Hey, man, watch out.

Watch out for that branch.

What's poison oak look like?

Sick of... So stupid.

Look at the size of that place.

That must have cost a fortune.

No question about it, Noodles.

This is definitely Mr. Big's joint.

Yeah. Well, nothing's moving,

so I think we're here for the night.

Looks like it's gonna be

a long night, Noodles.

Knock it off, Noodles,

just knock it off!

Don't even think about it.

[HOWL IN DISTANCE]

[SQU AWKING]

[PEOPLE LAUGHING]

[SQU AWKS]

I'm touching one.

Come on. Let's get out of here.

This place is weird.

You don't have

to shave my legs.

It's the dude!

Hey, Hamburger Dude.

Hey, remember me?

Remember us?

I met you in Chinatown.

No.

Hey, listen, uh...

Remember the cheque?

It was a mistake.

We gotta take the money back.

Sh*t. Thank God

we found him, man.

Money's gone.

What?

Money's gone.

Hey, Hamburger Dude!

Hey, Hamburger Dude,

wait up! Hey, man!

CHONG:
Hey, get him, man.

I'll go round the back.

Hey, lady. I'm first.

Oh, you, hey, I'm glad I found you.

We gotta have our money back.

I'm first to get my medication.

I'm first for everything.

Hey, man. Hey, look,

there was a mistake made, man.

You shouldn't have got the money.

No.

Hey, man, I ain't bullshitting with you.

Hey, man! Give me my money back!

[PEOPLE YELLING]

[WHISTLING]

Unhand me!

He's got our money!

Take him away!

Hey! They're taking me! Help!

It was a mistake, man!

I'll never do coke again, man!

Let me go! It was a mistake, man.

[SCREAMING]

My balls itch!

[GRUNTING]

[SCREAMING]

My balls itch.

CHONG:

Cheech!

Hey, man!

Hey, Cheech!

Hey, man!

Hey, where are you?

Hey, I'm over here!

Hey!

Cheech!

Help! I'm right here, man!

Where are you?

I'm right here!

Oh, wow.

Where you been, man?

Hey, man, they strung me up

and put me in here.

I been looking all over you, man.

We're in a nuthouse.

You know where we are, man?

We're in a nuthouse.

Yeah. They got me chained up.

Yeah, they got you chained up.

Yeah, come on, man. Get me out

of here. These people are nuts.

Get the key, man. Get the key.

It's locked up.

It's locked up.

Yeah, get the key.

I gotta get a key.

Yeah.

They think I'm a doctor, man.

They put me in charge of medication.

Oh, that's heavy.

I'll be right back, man.

Okay, hurry up.

Don't go away.

Okay, get the key

and get me out of here, man.

Hurry up, man!

And then scratch my balls, man!

Hey! Hey, man!

Anybody, scratch my balls!

You know, Noodles,

I'm a little worried about the sarge.

He's a little strange lately.

He's not himself. It's, like...

I dunno if this case is getting to him,

or it's his diet, or what. But he's...

Notice how pale he's been looking?

Pasty kinda looking, you know?

MAN:
I'm locking up now.

You got your keys?

Hey, listen, I'll talk to you

when you get off the wall, all right?

Bye.

[FLY BUZZING]

Grapefruit. I think

that's probably what he needs.

More grapefruit, more sunshine.

CHONG:

Cheech! Cheech!

Hey, man! In here!

Hey, man. We lucked out.

I found a real doctor, man.

Says he can help us.

Give us the key.

I got the key right here.

Thank God. Get me

out of here, man.

I'm not really crazy.

This is a big mistake

that we're in here, man.

[LAUGHING]

You want the key?

Hey, please, doc. Get me out

of here. Let me be free.

I just want the key, okay?

You're sure

you want to be free?

Yeah, yeah! I wanna be free!

Just give me the key, okay? Please!

Come here.

Stick out your tongue.

What?

Stick out your tongue.

There's the key.

The key?

This is not the key.

I want the key.

That's the key to the universe.

Wait a minute, man.

Get me out of here.

Hey, give me some, man.

That's a key for you.

What was it?

No, don't tell me.

I want it to be a surprise.

You're feeling free already.

[LAUGHING ECHOING]

Hey, man.

Hey, I got the key, man.

Hey, man?

Hey, man.

All right. What's up?

My name is Jimi.

I'm gonna do one song

before I get back into my box. Yeah.

[MIMICS ELECTRIC GUITAR]

[SINGING]

HAMBURGER DUDE:

Right this way, please.

Right this way, please.

[LAUGHING]

Hey, don't worry about it.

They can't do this to you, huh?

Hey, believe me.

You're okay. You're all right.

Don't worry about it, hm?

Would I lie?

Hey, trust me. Hey, believe me,

they can't do this to you.

And if they do,

don't worry about it.

We'll get back at them.

[PHONE RINGING]

Hey, we'll get back at them

because they can't do this to you.

Just a minute.

Yeah? Hello.

Oh, governor, thank God.

Wow, what a relief.

Yeah, we were on our way.

Really? Oh, great.

That's great to hear, governor.

Yeah. Yeah. That's not for you.

Go ahead.

Yeah, governor. Love it. Love it.

Have your girl call my girl,

we'll talk.

[SCREAMS]

Now, don't be frightened.

It's just me.

I'm so sorry. Boys, there's been

a terrible mistake.

Uh, Howie is going to say something

to you, aren't you, Howie?

I'm going to get you out of this

as quickly as possible.

Howie? Now, say...

Come on, say your little thing.

I'm sorry I took the money.

That's it.

I'm sorry I took the money!

I'm sorry!

I'm sorry.

That's enough, dear.

I'm awfully sorry.

That's just fine. That's fine.

Now, boys, all the money is here.

Come along, Howie.

Sorry.

I just want to apologise again

to tell you how sorry I am

about the mistake.

And if there's anything

at all I can do for you,

please don't hesitate to ask.

Come along, Howie.

Sorry.

Time for your lobotomy.

I'm sorry.

I'm not sorry I took the money!

Oh, man...

My head.

I still got a head.

Ooh, money.

It's all here.

[TIRES SCREECH]

DROOLER:

Come on out with your hands up.

This is the police,

Detective Drooler speaking.

Let's get out of here.

Come on, let's go.

Hey, out here.

Where you going?

Hey, man, don't worry about it.

Just follow me. Come on.

Hey!

[SIREN WAILS]

You clowns really thought

you were pretty smart,

trying to sneak out on us, huh?

You know, the only thing that

gets me is that you actually thought

you could get away with it.

I did it! I did it all!

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm awfully sorry.

Yeah, sure, you're sorry.

The sorriest thing I've seen all week.

Don't be frightened.

You people, you've made

a terrible mistake.

Mr. Big, huh? Well, you're not

so big now, are you? Right, boss?

DROOLER:

Yeah. It's always guys like you

that try to get away with it.

HAMBURGER DUDE:
Mr. Lizard!

Would you care for

a hamburger?

[CROWD CHEERING]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Come on, man,

it's time to go to work.

Hey.

Oh, man! What the...?

What are you doing, man?

You're so stupid, man.

God!

Come on,

let's go to work. Sh*t.

Stupid, man. If you hadn't

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