Not Another Not Another Movie Page #7

Know where the men's room is?

Best action movie

Of all time.

over the top.

Wrong. Delta force.

Scariest movie.

Scariest movie?

When i turned ten,

I saw something

That scared the crap

Outta me.

A bad guy in a movie, um...

I don't know

How to put into words...

Terrorizing.

He kept me up so many nights,

Givin' me nightmares.

Still does.

it was the bad guy from

Kindergarten cop.

Hey, how you doin'?

Hey, how's it goin'?

Good.

kindergarten cop.

Hey, how are you?

Awesome to meet

You, man.

Richard tyson.

Richard, bart.

Wow. I'm bart.

Yeah, just put that

On file there. Wow!

Yeah. On file here.

That's awesome.

Nice to meet you.

What's your name?

I'm bart.

Bart, nice to

Meet you, man.

This is my best head shot

I've ever had.

We'll keep it on file here.

This is randy.

Hey, randy, how you--

Randy?

Randy?

Is it something i ate?

That is randy.

He's energetic, isn't he?

I'm wiping my eyes.

Am i sitting here

With richard tyson?

Are you? Wow.

Wow!

I'm very honored to be here.

I mean, yeah.

You might be

Perfect for this.

Might be?

remember when you

Worked with schwarzenegger

On kindergarten cop?

Oh, schwarzenegger.

Yeah, yeah.

You guys had

That on-screen chemistry.

I looked at you,

And you get it

Like i get it.

On-screen what?

You know, i'm starting to

Get used to this makeup thing.

I mean, it's a gift.

I never knew i had it,

But i'm pretty good at it.

Kind of regret not wearing it

More as a child.

Maybe i should try it.

(quiet conversation

And laughter)

What up, what up?

Tryin' to make an honest dollar.

Know what i'm sayin',

Guys, boss man?

One more word, i'll

Rip your lips off

And glue 'em to your navel.

Morning, randy.

Good morning.

What a happy day, huh?

Amanda.

Yes, sir?

You look

Like a hooker.

Thank you, sir.

that's very sweet.

Buenos dias.

hola.

What are they

Still doing here?

Let's get down to it.

Let's go over these schedules.

We have one week left. Randy,

You have the details.

I apologize. I'll go over

The details here.

Sir, what we have

Here with the... Ow!

Nancy:
what's your problem?

I think something

Bit me, sir. Ow! Mm!

Wes:
what's wrong, randy?

Oh, oh!

You okay?

I feel like something

Is biting my nards.

You're screwin' with

My hangover right now.

I'm so sorry. No!

You want me to fire you?

You'll be off this project.

Feels like something is

Literally taking a bite

Of my genitals.

One more word, and i'll

Staple your lips together.

'cause i have a nail gun...

(gun fires again)

Right here.

Now keep it shut.

(gun fires again)

Right. Saving caps.

What are we gonna do?

You know what, sir?

I actually don't have

Any ideas on this matter,

But randy has quite a few.

Go ahead, randy.

(gun fires again)

Randy?

You understand the queen's

English, randy? Spit it out.

Just tell him

Your ideas.

(gun fires repeatedly)

Come on, randy.

Just let it out.

Go ahead.

Get off my shoes, randy.

That's what we don't

Need in a leader, right?

Am i right?

It was kind of like

Being pinched really hard

In the nut sack.

My dad used to pinch me

Really hard

When i wouldn't salute him

Or call him sir,

Or get the towels

In the bathroom

Aligned just perfectly.

They had to be perfect,

The his and her towels.

I mean, aligned just right,

Or, oof!

He also used to shoot me

With a bb gun, and that hurt.

wait a second.

If you mess with me,

I will cut your throat

Like a stick of butter.

Like a stick

Of butter. Like.

No. I mean...

If you mess with me,

I will cut your throat...

You're not scary.

"if you mess with me,

I'll cut your throat

Like a stick of butter,"

Is the line.

If you mess with me,

I will cut your throat

Like a stick of butter.

Okay?

It was bad.

I'll tell you,

You're too cute...

If you mess with me,

I will cut your throat

Like a stick of butter.

That's the best you got?

Ow!! What?

(forcefully)

If you mess with me,

I will cut your throat

Like a stick of butter.

I knew it!

Get out of my way!

What's wrong with that guy?

I don't know.

What's this guy's problem?

I'm gonna f***in'

Knock him across the wall

In a second here.

I don't...

What's he afraid of, ya know?

I celebrate christmas,

I go to the ymca

On occasion.

I walk to the park.

Sometimes, i sail on boats.

Randy? Hey, i'm sorry, dude.

Come on. We got off

On the wrong foot.

I feel bad. I was just

Readin' my lines, right?

You wrote the lines.

If you come out here,

We give it a chance,

We'll start over.

How's that sound?

All right.

You're startin' to make me

Look like an a**hole.

If you don't come up,

I'm gonna go out to my truck,

Get my filet knife,

And gut you like a fish.

Startin' to make me

Look like an a**hole.

'cause acting,

That's like a tennis match.

It's like, you fire

Me a line and then you fire one.

And then it's

Back and forth.

Who wins, i don't know.

That's how the scene plays out,

but, um... When

A few good men came out,

Were you gettin',

Like, mad ass?

I'm married.

That's cool.

You know what?

I need to talk

To the director,

If he's awake.

Randy!

Okay, patrick,

How's it goin'?

Any word?

Nothin'.

Okay.

John. John, how you doin'

On that asteroid, man?

Listen, we really need you

To push that button or

We're all gonna die here, john.

john! We really need you

To push that button, man.

come on, john,

Push the button.

What are you doin', john?

What are you doin'?

John, push

The button, buddy.

Come out to the asteroid,

We'll get together,

We'll have a few laughs.

John, you gotta do it, man!

We're runnin' outta time.

Come on, mcclane.

Welcome to the party, pal.

John, listen to me

Very carefully.

You gotta push that button.

What do you think,

I'm stupid, ha--?

I said, what do you think,

I'm stupid, hans?

Who the hell is hans?

John, come on, man.

Push the button!

Let me talk

To my daughter.

John, listen to me

Very carefully.

You've already spoken to

Your daughter three times, okay?

daddy?

Hey, baby.

It's daddy.

You gotta help us.

We need to live.

You gotta push the button.

I'm gonna have to break

That promise i made to ya.

daddy's not

Comin' home.

I know. You gotta

Push the button, okay?

What am i doin'

With a gun in space?

You gotta press the button!

Press the button!

Push it, john!

Daddy, push it!

Let me talk to him.

Okay.

I gotta quit

Smokin' cigarettes.

Dad, it's me. Listen.

What you're doin' is

A very brave thing.

You should be proud.

I am.

I'm just the wrong guy

In the wrong place

At the wrong time.

Wait a minute.

That's not my dad.

My dad's supposed to be

Flying a fighter jet into

An alien spaceship.

Who's drivin' this ship,

Stevie wonder?

Sorry.

It's cool.

There's some tang

In the cooler.

I'll get some tang.

They still make tang?

They do.

I love tang.

You know they make

Grape tang now.

John! John,

Push the button, john!

Johnny, push

The button, john!

It's over, john.

We all hate you, john.

push it!

Yippie-kai-yay, mother...

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