On Golden Pond Page #5

- Big rolls.

- All right!

- Two threes. What does that mean?

It means doubles,

which always means you get 14, ya see?

You just send me home

and get 20 more, for God's sake.

All right, Dadders!

- Good.

- Excellent. You're a natural.

Startin' to regret

teaching you this game.

Chels. Hey, Chels.

Parcheesi pro.

Chelsea doesn't like

playing games.

We don't know why.

Probably doesn't like losing.

I tend to panic when

the competition gets too intense.

- What's that supposed to mean?

- Nothing.

We play serious Parcheesi

around here.

I let Norman win every week or so

just to keep his spirits up.

Ah, ha, ha, ha.

What I'd like to know is

why you enjoy playing games.

- Huh?

- You seem to like beating people.

I wonder why.

You get another chance, Bill.

Another roll of the dice.

Well, here's

my little early bird.

Mmm.

Are you having fun?

That's why you come to camp,

you know... to have fun.

What's the matter, darling?

Nothing.

I don't think I've ever grown up

on Golden Pond.

Do you understand?

No. No, I don't think

I understand.

It doesn't matter.

I act like a big person

everywhere else.

I'm in charge

of Los Angeles.

And I come here,

I feel like a little fat girl.

That's just because

your father said that.

My father is

a goddamn bastard.

Oh, come on, Chels.

Watch your language.

Why? You gonna

wash my mouth out with soap?

That was a rather

bizarre custom.

Mother, do you know,

I've been answering to Norman all my life.

Makes me so mad!

Even when I'm 3,000 miles away...

and I don't even see him,

I'm still answering to him.

Norman is

a goddamn poop.

Oh, for the Lord's sake,

here we go again.

You had a miserable

childhood.

Your father was overbearing,

your mother ignored you.

What else is new?

Chelsea...

you have a great big chip

on your shoulder...

which is very unattractive.

It is. It is.

You stay away for years at a time.

You never come home

unless I beg you to...

and then when you do, all you can do

is be disagreeable about the past.

What's the point?

Don't you think that everyone

looks back on their childhood...

with a certain amount of bitterness

and regret about something?

It doesn't have to

ruin your life, darling.

You're a big girl now.

Aren't you tired of it all?

Bore, bore.

Life marches by, Chels.

I suggest

you get on with it.

Have a wonderful trip,

darling.

And don't worry.

Billy will take good care of us.

- Okay.

- Don't go getting involved with any foreigners.

Right.

Let me have

your bag, Chels.

Good-bye, kid.

Okay.

- You're gonna be okay now?

- Oh, sure.

- You behave yourself.

- Yeah. You guys behave yourself too.

We will. Okay.

Norman, good-bye.

- You work on that Parcheesi game.

- Ha, ha, ha.

Good luck, everybody.

- Thank you so much. We had a great time.

- Thank you.

- I was so happy you came.

- Okay. Bye-bye.

- Bye-bye.

- Bye-bye.

Just want you guys to know that

I'm not about to take any crap from you.

Well, gentlemen...

it's a beautiful day.

- We're going fishing.

- What?

- We're going what?

- Fishing.

You remember fishing,

Norman.

You're going to show Billy what

life is all about on Golden Pond.

Come on, Billy.

Bullshit.

I beg your pardon.

Does that mean you

can't wait to get out there...

or that it's not

your cup of tea?

It's bullshit, that's all.

I see.

Well, come on, Norman.

Let's get ready.

You like that word,

don't you? Bullshit.

Yeah.

It's a good word.

Okay, Grandpa,

do your stuff.

Hey, hey!

Pretty slick, huh?

Look at this.

This was Chelsea's when

she was about your age.

Caught some pretty

respectable fish wearin' this.

Surprised you still

kept it, if it's Chelsea's.

I might not

stick around here.

I might just haul my ass...

out to Wyoming or Puerto Rico...

one of those places.

Listen. I mean, I know I'm

just being dumped here.

Which is like my middle name.

You turkeys don't want me.

Bullshit.

I'm 67 years older than you.

How do you know

what I want?

We're going fishing now.

We want you to go along.

If you want to come with us...

I suggest you get your ass

down to the dock in two minutes.

Okay, Mrs. Turkey,

let's go.

Here he is.

I thought I might...

just sort of come along

and see what this bullshit is all about.

Get in.

You look very handsome

in that fishing vest.

Oh, thank you!

I mean, thank you.

So, how fast does this

old tub go, anyway?

All right!

Go up this time,

not just back. Up and back.

Come on.

Come on.

Nothing to be afraid of.

Back flip's one

of the easiest dives.

Oh, yeah? Then why don't you

come and try it?

Norman, you stay

right where you are.

Dive, boy.

All right.

One, two, three!

- Ouch! Good God!

- That wasn't it.

- Thanks for telling me.

- Norman, we've got him for a whole month.

Don't kill him

the first week.

This is it?

This is it.

Give me your hook.

You got to be patient when

you're fishing for trout, boy.

There's a trout

living in this cove...

that weighs 10 pounds

if he weighs an ounce.

First saw him

three or four years ago.

Hooked him

two years ago...

and again last year.

But he's a crafty old

son of a b*tch!

It's your

last chance, Walter!

Called him Walter 'cause

he reminds me of Ethel's brother.

'Cause he's fat

and lazy and ugly!

Okay, throw her out.

Let her out.

Plenty of line.

How's your line?

On the bottom?

If your line's floating,

it's on the bottom!

That isn't doing you any good. Bring it up!

Bring it up, for Christ's sake!

All right.

Hey, man, you don't have to yell at me.

Who do you think you are,

anyway, Long John Silver?

God.

I'm sorry.

That's okay.

Havin' fun?

- Yeah.

- That's good.

Better than cruising chicks,

isn't it?

- No.

- I suppose not.

For God's sake!

What the hell are you doin' here?

Brought your lunch.

How the hell

did you find us?

Shh! You'll scare

the fish.

Ethel, this is supposed

to be a secret fishing place.

Lucky guess.

We don't need any lunch.

We got more important things going on.

Don't be such an old poop.

Billy might get hungry.

Bye-bye.

Maybe we ought to see

what she brought us.

Hold on,

you son of a b*tch!

- What? What?

- Run with it!

Hey, it's not Walter,

but he's related.

Oh, you ugly old

son of a b*tch!

- San frantastic!

- I love you! I love you!

Get the net, boy. We're gonna

have trout for dinner tonight.

Not the little one.

The big one. It's in back of me.

That ain't no stupid sunfish.

Oh, ho! Little baby.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Wait a minute. Oh, lovely!

Get the net

down underneath him.

- Slowly bring him up.

- Oh, wow.

Look at that beauty.

Yes, sirree.

Oh, ho!

This is a trout.

A rainbow trout.

Good going, boy!

Norman, we've caught

eight million fish.

- Are you sure none of these is Walter?

- Yep. Walter is humongous.

Those fish you got there

are little mothers.

They're disgusting

little mothers.

You got something

against fish guts, boy?

Hey, Norman, can I

ask you somethin'?

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