Our Relations Page #2

None of your business what's in it!|Go on, get out of here!

And don't call me Cappy!

- Can you tell us where...?|- Shh!

Pardon us, officer,|but where is Denker's Beer Garden?

Just around the corner there.

Thank you.

- Pardon me, officer.|- Me too.

That's all right.

(Till bell rings)

Lil, looks like the fleet's in.

l'm having beer. What's yours?

We gotta take it easy,|we've only got a dollar.

l know. What are you gonna have?

Suppose we share the same beer?|We won't spend so much money.

That's a good idea.

Garcon! Garcon!

What do you mean, ''garcon''?|lt's Grogan. What'll you have?

Why, l'd like a nice...

large, cold...

flagon of beer.

- What's yours?|- Two clean straws that haven't been used.

l wonder what's in that package.

Didn't you hear what the Captain said?|That's none of your business.

Always prying into other people's affairs!

(Whistles appreciatively)

lsn't that a pip?

(Whistles) lt certainly is.

That must have cost more than $5.

What do you mean $5?|lf it cost a penny it cost $50!

Huh!

That'll be a quarter.

A quarter?! What for?

Ten cents for the beer|and 15 cents for the straws.

You don't think|we're giving 'em away, do you?

Waiter, could you exchange this|for a couple of spoons?

Give me those straws,|l'm gonna get to the bottom of this.

Oh, l'm sorry. Just a little accident.

That's all right. Accidents will happen.

(Giggles)

lf l've spoiled your drink|may l buy you another?

We don't mind if you do. Won't you join us?

Oh!

We don't mind if we do.

Thank you. Come, Alfie.

My name is Mr Hardy|and this is my very good friend Mr Laurel.

l'm glad to know you.|This is my very good friend Lily.

- How do you do, Lily?|- How do you do?

And my name is, er, Alice.

Alice.

My mother's name was Alice.

(lnhales)

(Sighs)

Your mother's name wasn't Alice.

That was her second name|on my father's side.

Hey, Joe, meet a couple of pals of ours -|Mr Laurel and Mr Hardy.

l met 'em. So what?

Two more beers for the ladies.

- No more beer for us.|- Oh, you must have something...Alice.

lf you insist l'll have an absinthe frappe.

l think l'll have the same.

You couldn't split one, could you?

What about something to eat?

- What's ready?|- A quarter pound steak's just coming.

- OK.|- And you?

A Lobster Newburg, mock turtle soup,|a New York cut steak - well-done,

lyonnaise potatoes,|broccoli with hollandaise sauce on the side,

lettuce with Roquefort cheese dressing,|coffee - demitasse - and that's all.

Don't you want any dessert?

- That's sweet of you. Crepe suzette.|- (Lily) Make that two.

(Crack)

Excuse me just a moment.

(lnaudible)

Er, will you pardon us? My friend|wishes to speak to me in private.

- Go right ahead.|- We'll be right back.

Let's go in there, we can talk|and nobody will hear us.

(Grunts)

What is it?

What about them ordering all that food?|We've only got 75 cents.

l've got it all figured out.

We'll go and see Finn|and get our money back.

He won't give us it. We told him...

Oh, yes he will. l know how to handle him.

Besides, it's our money|and we'll do what we like with it.

l thought we were going to start saving.

We can start saving on the next trip.

We've got a chance to have a swell time|so we might as well take advantage of it.

l guess you're right.|We can be millionaires anytime.

Any old time. Now let's go back to the girls.

(Telephone ringing)

- Hello?|- Hello.

- Who is it?|- lt's me.

- What do you want?|- Nothing, what do you want?

- Nothing, you rang.|- l didn't do anything of the kind.

- You did...|- Put that back and get out of here.

(Ringing)

(Slurring) Hey! Would you chaps mind|stepping out a minute? That call is for me.

Hey! Stay where you are, l'll get it,|it'll only take a second.

l'm sorry to disturb you boys|but this call is from the wife.

You know, l have to tell her|l'm bringing home the milk.

Would you rather we stepped out?

No, stay where you are, l'll just be a second.

(Ringing)

Hello! (Grunts)

- l lost... Where is it? Where'd you...?|- Right here, sir.

- You won't talk long?|- l won't.

Listen, l'm bringing home the...

Pardon me, will ya?

Just a minute! lt's a little...|l don't know, it's so crowded.

Here, could you...?

lt's just... Hello?|Just a minute now. l'll get this.

Hello?! l'm calling about...

Er...l think somebody took the phone.|Wait a minute.

Hello, Sarah. Yes. How much?

Just a minute. Hello!

Boys, just a minute. Listen.

Just... l'll pull the wire.

l'll... Oh, l lost it! Where's the thing?

Where you got that thing? Do you got it?|Are you hurt?

- l'll get it.|- Hello?

(Yells)

Just a minute, something's on my foot.|Can you hold the wire?

Wait a minute, l can't find the...

Whoa! Hello?!

Hello? Can you...?

(All) Ohh!

- What's the big idea?|- Sorry, sir, just a little accident.

Yeah, well, you'll pay for this.

Just put it on the check, please.

- Don't worry, it'll be on there.|- Come, Alf.

Joe, come and give me a hand with this!

- Did you get in a fight?|- No, just a little conference.

- Nothing serious, l hope?|- Oh, no.

We've just decided that if you don't mind,|we'll change our clothes

and take you out for a good time.

- That's OK with me.|- Me too! Don't be long.

- We won't.|- Don't go away cos we're coming back.

- You bet we won't.|- We'll be back in a jiffy.

- Hey, where do you think you're going?|- Shh.

We're going to change our clothes|and get some more money.

- More money?|- Yeah, you see we didn't have enough.

Yes, sir, and while we're gone, see that|the little ladies have everything they desire.

- Goodbye.|- Goodbye.

Now, don't go away, will you?|We won't be long.

Come on, don't dilly-dally!

You're always fiddling around.

Just a minute, you think l'd let you|get away from here without paying that bill?

You give me that dough|or l'll beat you both up or have you pinched.

Or maybe both!

Can't you make up your mind?

My good man, don't you understand?|lt's simple.

- We'll get our money and come back.|- See?

No, you ain't leaving here until you pay|or leave me something for security.

Why don't you leave him the ring?

We'll get our money from Finn|and the Captain won't be any the wiser.

- Splendid.|- We've figured out a plan.

You'll like this.

How about that for security?

(Whistles appreciatively)

(Whistles) lsn't that a daisy?

- lt's all right with me.|- Now remember.

When we come back and pay you|we get that ring back, right?

- Right.|- Right.

(Knock at door)

(Knock at door)

Who is it?

- lt's us.|- Hello, boys, come on in.

- How are you, Finn?|- What's on your mind?

We hate to disturb you|but we've come to ask a little favour.

What do you want?

We've just had the good fortune to meet|two charming and refined young ladies.

Yeah, Alice and Lily.

So what?

lf you don't mind, we'd like to cancel|our little financial arrangement.

We decided to put off being millionaires|till the next trip.

lf it's your money you want,|l am not interested.

- You won't give us our money back?|- l will not.

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