Our Relations Page #3

Synopsis: Unbeknownst to Stanley and Oliver, their long-lost twin brothers, sailors Alfie and Bert are in town on shore leave carrying a valuable pearl ring entrusted to them by their ship's captain. All four get involved in multiple cases of mistaken identity as a gang of hoodlums try to steal the ring Stanley and Oliver wind up with their feet in cement, about to be dumped into the harbor.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Harry Lachman
Production: MGM
 
IMDB:
7.5
APPROVED
Year:
1936
73 min
166 Views


But it's ours - besides, we don't get paid|till we get to Singapore.

Not one penny will you get.

l made a gentlemen's agreement with you|to protect you from yourselves.

- Should l go back on my word?|- We wouldn't mind, would we?

- We won't hold it against you!|- Go ahead.

Get out of here!

Well, if that's the way you feel about it|we'll be forced to assert our prerogative

and search this room.

Go ahead and search, what do l care?

You'll be sorry, putting us to all this trouble.

lt's no use looking here, you can search|till Doomsday and you'll never find it.

Does that mean it isn't in this room?

l wouldn't say yes and l wouldn't say no.

- You know what we can do?|- What?

- We can...|- Shh.

We can steal his clothes and pawn them|and get enough money to pay the bill.

We'll give you one more chance.|Do we get our money or not?

Absolutely not.

No! Oh!

(Finn grunting)

Hey, come back! Hey, stop!

Come on, you know|we've got to meet the wives.

Stay here - asking the pawnbroker|if he had any second hand ice-cream cones!

(Parps)

(Parps)

How much did you get?

- Two dollars.|- Well, we can't pay the bill with that.

- The girls are still...|- Don't worry, l'll take charge of this matter.

Come on.

Maybe we better talk to Finn from|a distance. He was pretty mad when we left.

Good idea.

(Whistles)

(Both) Oh, Finn!

- Maybe he's asleep.|- l'll wake him up.

(Clack)

Ow!

- We're back!|- Where's my clothes?

- We pawned them!|- What?!

lf you don't give us our money|we won't give you the ticket!

Yeah, and the ship'll sail|and you'll be left behind.

All right, give me the ticket|and l'll give you your money.

- You cross your heart?|- You don't doubt me, do you?

(Both) Yes!

Oh-ho!

We'll be right up!

Here's the ticket and|there's the two dollars to get your suit.

- Now give us our money.|- l have to go and get it.

- Where is it?|- Sewn in the lining of my coat you pawned.

Why didn't you tell us before?|Having us run about on a wild goose chase!

- Give me the ticket, l'll go and get it!|- Oh, no. Once bitten, twice shy!

- Give us the ticket...|- l've got it figured out. Take off your clothes.

- What for?|- One suit l'll wear there,

the other suit l'll pawn to pay the interest.

Oh, no you don't. Give me the ticket!

Don't you come near me or l'll swallow it|and you'll lose your money.

- Give me that!|- (Muffled)

No, don't swallow it, don't swallow it.

Take off your clothes and put them|down there. Put them down.

And no monkey tricks!

Well, here's another nice mess|you've gotten me into.

(Whimpering)

l wonder what those girls will think.

(Ollie) Hey, Finn!

- Are you coming back?|- l wouldn't say yes and l wouldn't say no.

Oh, and if l see Alice and Lily|l'll give them your love.

Maybe l'll give them a kiss for you.|(Chuckles)

- l wonder how much longer they'll be.|- l don't know.

(Both) Are you sure this is|where they said to meet?

- Shakespeare.|- Longfellow.

- What goes up the chimney?|- Smoke.

They make me sick...

- Darling!|- Hello, sweetie!

- l'm sorry we were late.|- Oh, we just got here.

What have you boys been doing?

- Ollie, tell 'em where we went.|- Stan took me to a Punch and Judy show.

- First one since l was a kid.|- How about some food? l'm famished.

Oh, that's a good idea. Why not go in here?

Oh, not in there, we know a better place.

- We'll go in here.|- But dear...

l said we'll go in here. Come along, Betty.

Oh, this is a nice table. Sit here, Betty.

- Let's go in the garden, it's cooler.|- All right, dear.

(Ollie) How's this table?

- (Daphne) Nice.|- Better than being inside.

Of all the nerve!

You got here at last, huh?

What do you mean? We weren't coming in|in the first place, were we?

l wasn't.|What are you gonna have, Momma?

A ham sandwich, mustard on the side|and a glass of beer.

- What would you like, Bubbles?|- Now, don't rush me, lover.

l think l'll have a nice Welsh rarebit.

- One Welsh rarebit.|- With cheese.

- What's yours?|- Er, l think l'll...

l know what you guys are gonna have.

He's an awfully fresh waiter.

Poppa, what did he mean,|''You got here at last''?

l don't know, Momma.

(Both) We never met him before in our lives.

- Shakespeare.|- Longfellow.

- What goes up the chimney?|- Santa Claus.

Silly.

The Welsh rarebit'll be right up.

lsn't that the way with men?

We've known them all afternoon|and they pick up with some strangers!

They're not gonna get away with it.|Come on, Lily.

l don't think much of your taste,|ditching us for these old frumps.

Pardon? Do you know who you're talking to?

Aw, sit down, old lady, before you fall apart.

Cutie, that wasn't very nice of you|to walk out and leave us sitting here.

l beg your pardon, madam,|just what do you mean?

What are you looking so innocent about?

- l'm not so innocent.|- You bet you're not!

And you oughta be ashamed of yourself!

No wonder you didn't want to come in here.|Thank goodness l found you out.

Ow! But l tell you, this is a frame-up!

We've never met these women, have we?!

- Uh-uh.|- Oh, you've never met us? Joe!

- Yeah?|- Who are these men?

Last time they called themselves|Mr Laurel and Mr Hardy.

Pay the check and let's get out of here!

Yes, pay it, we've been waiting two hours!

Bye-bye, babyface.

So you went to|a Punch and Judy show, huh?

Here's your bill.

No, 60 cents for this|and 15 dollars for before.

- l should...!|- Oh, pay the check!

- But...!|- Pay the check!

- l'll pay.|- You better pay the check.

Thanks. And here's the ring|you left for security.

Oh, so you're buying rings now.|l suppose that's part of the frame-up too?

Betty, l've had enough! And as for you,|you can see my lawyer in the morning.

Oh, lover, l don't see how you could|ever have done this to me.

l never was so humiliated in all my life.

- Glass of beer, please.|- OK.

(Betty sobbing)

(Till bell rings)

Well, well, well, fancy meeting you here.|Which is Alice and which is Lily?

- ''Alice and Lily''?|- Are you sure you know these gentlemen?

They're buddies of mine.|Where did you get the swell clothes?

- ''Clothes''?!|- Last time l saw them they had none on.

They had no clothes on?! Who is this man?

- He's an absolute stranger to us, isn't he?|- He certainly is.

Who am l? Er, you.

Stranger, eh?|Oh, trying to make out they don't know me!

Well, you take a look at that.

(Daphne) Oh!

(Betty) Oh! Ohh!

(Both) Oh!

That settles it.|Betty, we'll keep this as evidence.

- Momma, let me explain...|- Never speak to me again, Casanova!

- Come on, Betty!|- Goodbye, lover.

- Do you realise what you've done?|- l don't care.

You should've introduced me.|They weren't so hot anyway.

Where did you pick them up?|Did you win them on a punchboard?

- Do you know what l oughta do?|- What?

l oughta bend every bone in your head.

- ls that so?|- Yes.

Hm.

Uh-oh. Take a look through that.

Ow!

(Laughs)

Uh-oh. Well, l'll be seeing you.

Don't go. Sit down.

(Gulps)

(Wheezes)

- (Crackles)|- (Yells)

(Gasps)

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W.W. Jacobs

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Our Relations" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/our_relations_15415>.

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