Paul Page #2

Paul?

Yeah.

It's a nickname, it stuck.

My ship crashed and i ...

... dog ! It doesn't matter.

Look, can we get Clive Gollings back

on the RV and get the hell outa here, please?

- I can't be ...

- I'm in a hell of a pickle ...

And if you don't help me,

I could die on this road tonight.

I don't know, we're in a

quite tight schedule ...

Look man ...

Sometimes you just gotta

roll the dice.

What do you say?

Okay.

Okay. Perfect, great !

Okay, help me, help me grab him.

This man's peed his pants.

Yeah, he's got childs bladder.

Oh, fantastic ...

Doesn't this thing go any faster?

Well, I ...

- I'm sorry, the speed limit is 70 ...

- Screw the speed limit !

Actually, no. Uh, don't screw it.

That's good thinking. Okay?

Stay conspicuous.

That's good.

How come i can understand you?

You using some sort of neoron language router?

Actually, I'm speaking English,

you f***ing idiot !

Sorry ...

You're in shock right now.

I understand this must be very weird for you.

Just act normal and drive north.

Okay?

Gotta get as much as we can

between us and the Big Guy.

Zoil?

What's happening?

He's gone.

Sh*t !

Looks like he hitched a ride too.

- What do you mean?

- Tire tracks.

Bastard jacked a native ?!

Could be too ...

Don't you think this is a bit

of a coincidence?

Are you suggesting anew?

The little f***er might've

found home.

There might be a rescue party on the way.

Zoil, we need to break out the big guns.

Do you think that's wise?

The last thing we need is...

... a hu-ha ?!

Maybe you're right.

Listen, I got 2 rookies on a

special mission 75 clicks north of you.

I'll have them set up a road block.

These are just civillians,

why don't you let me take care of it?

You might need the extra muscle.

Just keep 'em in the dark.

I don't want any loose ends.

Well, these roads can be

treacherous at night.

People get in accidents ...

... all the time.

I like your thinking.

Get it done.

Heads up !

We just got reassigned.

Nice !

What about the sandwich?

- She said we could share it.

- I love this job.

I love pistachios.

I hate when you get a closed one, right?

I usually just bite them.

No, you don't do it at all.

They should be opened on their own way.

- No, that's mussels.

- No, I meant the pistachios ...

What are you doing ?!

He's ok, he's fine, he's friendly !!

His name's Paul !

Aliens aren't called Paul ...

Was that Klingon?

You psychotic nerd !

Listen, Paul is from a small M-Class planet

nothern spiral arm of the Andromeda Galaxy.

Thank you.

He looks too obvious !

There's a reason for that Clive !

Over the last 60 years, the human

race has been drip fed of images ...

... of my face, on lunch boxes,

and t-shirts and sh*t.

In case our species do meet,

you don't have a f***in' spaz attack !!...

Don't do it again !

You f***in' dorf, get

your fingers outta there !

If i get a jorf infection, you're dead !

Oh, my god !

Oh, sh*t ...

Paul ...

Paul?

Ok, ok, this could be it.

So, what are we looking for again?

I don't know.

What brings you to USA?

Uh, we're on holiday.

We've been to comic-con.

Comic-con?

Don't tell O'Rilley.

He loves that sh*t.

You guys know Benny Hill?

No ...

Oh my god, look at this !

- What ?!

- Look at this !

These guys met Adam Shadowchild.

Who the hell's

Adam Shadowchild?

He wrote the "Jupiter Praxis".

What?

"Jenny Starpepper

and the Huge White Gibbon"?

Huh?

"Night of the Moths"?

Are you speaking English?

He's ... brilliant ...

What was he like?

He was a bit intense.

Oh, he's an artist.

Let me see this.

What is this, nerd porn?

- Oh no, that's Clives ...

- It's my novel.

Okay ...

Uh ! Three tits !

That's awesome ...

You guys should've

given her 4 tits.

That's just sick !

I was just sayin'

Do you think this is it?

Not that full ...

What else did you find in there?

No, not much ...

Just some pissy jeans.

- Oh, Clive's got a child bladd....

- Shut up ...

Okay, you guys can go.

- Thank you.

- Thank you.

Can I have my novel?

Thank you very much.

May I ask what you're searching for?

No ...

Come on, Graeme.

- Way to go, Dirty Harry.

- You got that?

I ... did I catch you?

Oh my God, like a cold mechanic.

I think it's pretty obvious

what happened there isn't it?

Is it?

The government used some kind of

neoro toxic paint on the Black Mailbox.

Caused a shared hallucination

about aliens, it makes complete sense.

Oh !...

You're dick is gone ...

Oh, no ...

What?

Come on, grow up ...

You guys seen my shorts?

How did you do that?

How did you go invisible?

Oh, it's camouflage response.

Well, like "Predator"?

Exactly, altough i can only do it

while holding my breath.

You can do it anytime you want?

"Anytime".

That's just like it ...

Am I the only sane person here ?!

Eh ?!

It's allright for you, isn't it ?!

You'll go back to area 51 ...

... we'll be arrested for

harboring a fugutive !

And sent to Guantanamo Bay !

Why don't I go make

some bagels and coffee?

Leave you two alone.

What's the matter Clive?

There's an alien in the kitchen

making bagels and coffee.

- Did you want tea?

- No, I don't want tea !

Right, because tea is

weird in America, right?

They leave the baguette ...

What's weird Graeme is that we

picked up an extra terrestrial ...

... hitch hiker and you seem

completely fine with it !

Bagels and coffee ...

Uh ! Marmite ...

He said his life's in danger.

He needs our help, you know?

Sometimes you just gotta

roll the dice.

What if we wake up and

find him inserting a probe ...

... into our anus?

Apparently they don't do that.

Anyone, want one of these?

Eh, anyone?

Anyone?

Eh?

Coming, ready or not,

you son of a b*tch ...

Where's the other one?

I don't know sir.

Uh ...

Haggard !

Sorry, we were just ...

Haggard !

F*** ...

Nice ... uh ...

Get over here ... it's

the guy with the badge.

We were just playing hide and seek ...

... so we have a lot of time.

Hurry up.

I was hiding.

You have any traffic through here?

No, just a couple of hillbilly types.

Two nerdes in an RV.

Nerds, huh?

Yes, they've come from comic-con !

They've met Adam Shadowchild !

Who the hell is

Adam Shadowchild?

He ... he wrote Prison Hawk 441.

Ok? Jenny Starpepper and

the Spinning Worm.

Right? Fluxing your anus.

You know you're grown man, right?

Probably shave, pay taxes?

Have pubic hair?

All of those things.

- Did you search that vehicle?

- Yes , sir.

What'd you find?

Uh, nothin' much, just ...

A book with a green woman with three...

- ... titties.

- Dude, it's three titties.

Three tits, that's awesome.

Oh, and some pissy jeans.

Close that.

Preexisting problem ...

Listen to me you freakin' f***,

i want to know everyting you ...

... can remember about the

pissy nerds, ok?

We're leaving.

What about the road block, sir?

It didn't work.

Hey ! Rieces pieces !

Yes, thank you.

Heard there was a commotion

on the road after Rachel.

Funny, I didn't hear that.

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