Peter And Vandy Page #2

chance to talk, it's bullshit.

Yeah, you know you're still on

my sh*t list. You don't get to

joke with me.

Okay well we're going to go

dance because Emma took some

dancing lessons.

Stripper!

Love them. How long have they

been married?

Eight years. You guys get

reminded of your wedding at

these?

Not really.

It was so romantic she blocked

it out.

Yeah.

What's wrong with you? He was

there the day we were betrothed?

I was.

You use that word every chance

you get.

Betrothed?

Yes.

Betrothed?

Yes.

Betrothed?

Yes. I get your joke Paul,

you're very funny.

I'm getting another cocktail

does anybody want anything?

I'll have a beer.

I'll have one too.

Honey?

I'm good.

Do you have any singles?

What do you want it for?

Nothing.

Honey, this is a formal event.

You don't have to tip the

bartender.

Bartender didn't have a problem

with it.

It's not done.

Of course it's done I've done

it.

I don't want to argue about this

with you.

I'm asking you nicely.

And I appreciate that. But this

isn't one of your cousin's

weddings.

You don't tip the bartender.

Okay. You gonna give me the

singles or not?

Absolutely not. Look I

understand that you think you're

being a good person,

and you are, but it's

embarrassing and I don't want

you doing it.

Are you like my keeper now?

Listen. I'm not going to open

my purse and support something I

don't believe in.

Do you understand that? Now if

you want to go get singles and

give them to the bartender

and embarrass yourself, fine.

But I'm not going to help you

make an ass of yourself.

Fine! I forgot, what kind of

beer you want?

Uh, Stella would be fine.

Oh yeah.

I mean, unbelievable.

Is it me? Is it me? Just tell

me if I'm wrong, tell me if I'm

wrong.

Yeah. No. They're, uh, I mean

I've seen like a few people

doing it but, no.

Right. He expects me to just -

Jesus - he's over there asking -

What was that?

I don't know.

It's awesome though.

Don't say that we're like that.

We're not. We are not like that

at all.

What are you doing in my closet?

Nothing.

Oh. Here we go. You should

wear this one.

Good one.

What?

Shut up Vandy.

You shut up. I'm serious, you

should wear this one.

It would look really nice with

the gray suit.

Are you f***ing kidding me?

No I think you should wear it.

Okay. I'm serious, go back to

bed.

What's the matter. Poopy

doesn't want to wear a purple

shirt?

Poopy afraid he won't be a real

man if he's wearing a purple.

Poopy doesn't want to be touched

okay?

Don't get all tense already.

I'm not tense.

Stop acting like such an

a**hole.

Why don't you go back to bed?

It's early you don't need to be

up yet.

So you feel good?

What?

I mean do you feel like

yourself?

What are you talking about?

Well you said before you don't

do well in interviews,

that you go into a trance or

something, and you never end up

acting like yourself.

So are you feeling like

yourself?

Yeah. I'm feeling like myself.

Good. You're gonna be fine.

This tie is shorter than normal

ones.

Want me to do it?

So. Do you have things you know

you want to talk about?

Or are you just going there and

wing it? Or.

No I just answer the questions.

Oh.

Why?

Just wondering.

Are you okay?

Just can't believe this is

happening again.

What's the matter?

Nothing.

What?

I. I hate interviews. I suck

at them.

I go in there and I apologize

for myself

and I just didn't think it was

going to happen this time.

I thought I was done being a

jerkoff. F***!

Hey now, come here. Oh my baby.

Angel. You're gonna be great.

I'm just so tense.

Would you like for me to help

you relax?

What do you mean?

Just sit back. Let me do the

work. Hey. Who's the best

interviewer in the world?

I am.

That's right.

Thank you for saying that.

You mean the toast?

Yeah. No, I meant the wine.

Oh. Yeah I figured you meant the

toast but maybe you spent a lot

of time picking the wine.

No I got the wine from my dad I

- I meant the toast.

Thank you.

You're welcome? I'm sorry If I

Don't. Can I ask you something?

Course

Because we said we were going to

be honest with each other.

Right.

What are you thinking about?

Right now?

Or just a few seconds ago.

Um, I'm not sure what I was

thinking a few seconds ago.

Um, as for now, honestly, I'm

angry that you would ask me

that.

I feel like sh*t.

What else would I be feeling?

I'm sorry.

It's okay.

I was just trying to be close.

It's fine.

I don't know why I asked.

It's okay, it's okay.

I like the way you do things.

A lot. So.

I love you.

You do?

I do.

Well good.

Oh my god.

Hello Vandy.

Hi.

So.

What'cha doing?

I was just about to ask you.

Christmas shopping.

Right I saw the bags, I should

have put the two together.

I'm actually heading over to

that golf store.

I'm gong on a trip with uh Gary

and Paul. Going to Arizona.

Sure they're glad to have you

around.

Actually to do remember that

thing I read you about how you

play golf during the day,

uh, and you bet on all the holes

an that night you play poker

with the winnings?

Vaguely.

Yeah well, play poker uh with

the winnings until someone goes

bust. Should be fun.

It sounds like fun.

Um, I should get going I have a

thousand things to do.

Emma and I are gong to the

Caribbean after Christmas.

That's great! Where?

St. Thomas. It's her idea and

she got me the ticket and

everything

and so I want to get her

something so I was going to go

to that place,

that jewelry store that's near

our apartment - my apartment,

and um

Yeah that's a nice place uh,

it's expensive.

Yeah but I can have that jeweler

we know remake if I see

something.

Yeah that's what I was going to.

So I was going to go do that and

then I was going to go tanning.

That's a good idea.

So I don't get burned in the

Caribbean.

I know. Have you gone yet?

Yeah a week ago.

Yeah you look. You have a good

color.

Thanks.

So you're going that way?

Yeah um

I'm going in the other

direction, I would have walked

with you.

It's okay.

So is your family okay?

Yeah. And how bout yours?

Oh yeah, they're fine.

Have a great Christmas and a fun

time with the boys.

Say hi to Pail for me.

Okay yeah. Say hi to Emma for

me, she'll love that.

Shut up.

You shut up.

I should go.

Okay.

Have a good Christmas.

Yeah you too.

Hey.

Hey.

So.

So.

How'd it go?

Fine.

That's it? How did it go?

It went fine.

Did they give you any

indication?

They thanked me and said they'd

be in touch. It went well, I

mean.

Good you got the feeling then

that it went well.

Yeah I just said it went well.

Yeah I know it's just you're not

giving me any specifics.

Well I don't know what to tell

you it was an interview. It

went well, I guess, you know.

They guy was like 60 years old

so it's not like we, you know

it's not like we had friends in

common or something it was an

interview.

Do you know if he liked you?

I don't know if he liked me.

It's not like he was looking for

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