Picture This Page #3

use your phone and you can't watch TV.

Or use your computer.

That's four things.

Shall we go for five?

MANDY:
Trapped, a prisoner in

my own home.

The only thing that keeps me going

is the dream.

Call me.

(GASPS)

Mandy, you want some breakfast?

Just slide it under the door

like all the other prisoners.

(CELL PHONE BUZZING)

What's that noise?

My electric tooth brush.

I'm brushing my teeth.

Mmm-hmm.

Hi.

Hey, the drops worked.

My cat Andy is totally cool now, thanks.

Check out my page

on the Living Scrapbook website, okay?

-Sure.

-You are coming tonight, aren't you?

Of course you are.

I'm gonna grab some sick music.

-I'll see you tonight.

-Bye.

Undeclared?

(SCREAMS)

You all right? I'm not deaf, you know.

I hear sounds.

Conversations on the phone.

Grounded, come on.

Kitten.

Dad, is it possible that you're overreacting

with far too much aggression

to such a minor transgression?

(PHONE RINGING)

Hello?

Why, no, Alexa, she can't speak with you

because she's grounded.

Not sure you got the memo.

-No, I'm not insane.

-Yes, you are.

No, no, I'm sure it's an emergency.

It's just that she's grounded.

That's why she can't talk to you.

Yeah, when you don't listen.

I'll take this, Miss Consequences.

Breakfast, on the other hand, is out here,

in case you want it.

(DOOR CLOSING)

Grounded. I can't believe I'm grounded.

(SIGHING)

What am I going to do?

I need a sign.

My Magic 8 Ball.

Magic 8 Ball, keeper of all wisdom,

speak to me in my time of need.

I've heard the siren song

of a hot teenage male.

Is it my destiny to boldly venture forth

to this party tonight?

Let me try that again.

But, of course.

(BECAUSE I'M AWESOME PLAYING)

And I'll beat you

'Cause I'm awesome

-I'm a leader, I'm a winner

-I'm a leader, I'm a winner

-And I'm cleaner

-And I'm cleaner

-'Cause I'm awesome

-'Cause I'm awesome

-I don't need you

-I don't need you

-'Cause I'm neat-o

-'Cause I'm neat-o

-And I'll beat you

-And I'll beat you

'Cause I'm awesome, uh-huh!

-Dad, I was just wondering...

-The answer's no.

Fine.

I guess there is a first time for everything.

Even a D minus.

I'm sorry, what?

Oh.

-Now he listens.

-Yeah.

Okay, Dad. I have a totally for-real

legitimate homework 911 crisis.

I have to go to Alexa's house

to study history and econ.

We have finals.

So you expect me to believe that

on the night of this wildly important party,

you're gonna go out,

but you're gonna study at Alexa's.

When life hands me a lemon,

that's you,

I make lemonade,

by studying hard, so I can get

good grades to get into a good school

and become

a productive member of society.

Yeah, the lemon's not really buying that.

It's fine. I understand.

You don't trust me.

And even though that eviscerates

my very well-being, it's fine.

I'll just stay here and wallow in despair.

Probably scar myself for life,

but don't worry, okay?

-No.

-I'm sure eventually, I'll forgive you,

by the time

you start collecting social security.

But seriously, I have to study.

Let me ask you this,

will Alexa's mom be there?

Yes.

So we'd have genuine authentic

adult supervision.

All right, I'm gonna say okay.

But there are some rules.

First of all, you can have your phone back.

That's exciting.

But you're not allowed to make any calls.

In fact, you're not allowed to receive

any calls, other than from me.

And I'm gonna be calling every half hour.

You know, just to make sure

everything's going well with the studies.

Thanks, Dad. I really appreciate you

trusting me so much

-you're putting me under phone arrest.

-Well.

You've given a whole new meaning

to the term cell phone.

Enjoy.

And don't worry, I don't need the car.

I can just walk.

It's not like the hills are crawling

with low-lifes or escaped mental patients,

convicts and gangsters

with guns and knives.

Please take the car,

I wouldn't have it any other way.

Okay, if you insist.

But I need you to know

that I'm not really a monster.

It's just that other than love,

the most important thing

between a daughter and father is trust.

Of course, Dad. And I want to trust you.

Seriously, one more deception,

you're staying here. There's no UCSB.

You're gonna live here

and you're gonna go to junior college.

Study well.

I thought you said she was grounded.

BLAIR:
Well, that's what

Teddy heard from Buck's sister.

LISA:
So?

They have a friend

who's in Cayenne's Spanish class.

That's great intel, guys.

LISA:
What is she doing?

Why does she have a backpack?

-What's in her backpack?

-Books?

No one carries books in a backpack.

That little wench is up to something.

(DRIVE PLAYING)

Loving it all, I've got it made

Now I'm the one who is ashamed

I had her heart

It was in my hands

She didn't take her backpack.

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

You're here. It's a prison break.

If only.

You know those electronic cuffs

they put on criminals' ankles?

This is worse.

My dad's gonna call every half hour

to check in on me.

Nail scissors.

No, thanks. I'm fine.

Get me nail scissors.

Pay attention. You might learn something.

(CAR DOOR OPENING)

Your father is Big Brother

and he's watching you.

My one shot at

high school nirvana is blown.

(SHADOWS OF THE NIGH PLAYING ON TV)

What are you watching?

Just reliving my glory year.

Ninth grade, the talent show.

Cayenne and I rocked the house.

It's been all downhill since then.

That is so not true.

If anything, you've gotten better.

I've seen you play like a thousand times.

You could so be

a big glamorous star right now.

Yeah, except for the minor detail

of my vocal cords freezing,

the panic attacks and

the projectile vomiting

if I set foot on stage.

-Hey, guys.

-Hey.

Alexa, do you have anything I can eat?

What, the Twinkies and the Skittles

aren't gonna hold you?

(ALEXA SINGING SHADOWS OF THE NIGH ON TV)

DANNY:
So this Mandy Gilbert girl...

BOY:
She's got some sweet boobsicles.

No wonder Drew's trying...

DANNY:
Yeah, but she's not

girlfriend material.

He's just gonna do her and drop her.

You know, hit and run.

BOY:
Yeah. Strictly a hump and dump.

And then rush her out.

Hit and run?

Hump and dump? Rush her?

(EXCLAIMING IN DISGUST)

Where did you find this?s

Melissa Gilcrest was

under the bleachers at school.

She just sent it to me, but...

Okay, I kept asking myself, you know,

what would a fly guy like Drew

want with our dear sweet Mandy?

And then it hit me.

The ritual sacrifice.

What are you saying?

Drew Patterson is an Aztec?

Definitely a descendant.

Because every year at the Patterson bash,

a Patterson boy

takes a girl up to the tower

where he deflowers them in the shower.

Okay. Drew is no different.

He's gonna be just like his big brothers.

That whole thing is stupid gossip.

It's more than gossip. It's a rumor.

I say we tell her.

I say you keep your mouth shut

and let her dream.

Guys, it's 5:
28.

We've only got two minutes

until my dad calls,

and I promised him

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