Pottersville Page #7

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Well, I am here with the hoaxster

himself, Maynard Greiger,

to get his side of the story.

So, Mr. Greiger,

why did you do it?

Well, I never meant for

it to happen, really.

But when people started

really thinking I was Bigfoot

and I saw how happy it made

them, I figured, why not?

Why do you think this town

was so captivated by him?

I don't think it's just our town, really.

I mean, it could be any town.

People everywhere are looking

for something to believe in.

We had fallen on hard times,

like a lot of other places...

this magical sense of...

well, Bigfoot,

you know, that sense that

something else was out there.

It really brought

the town together.

I haven't seen this town so

alive in a long time, and...

It seemed to give everybody the faith and

hope that things were gonna be okay.

I guess that's why I did it.

If you had to do it all

over again, would you?

You know, let's just say that hope

isn't always the most realistic thing,

but it tends to make the

world a better place.

Thank you, Mr. Greiger.

- Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas to you.

This is Stacy Gutierrez

live from Pottersville.

Thank you, Mr. Greiger,

that was great.

My pleasure. You're welcome.

- Hey.

- Hi.

I have some friends who

want to talk to you.

Hey, fellas. What's going on?

Thanks for letting us sell

our stuff out of your store.

And thank you also for just...

well...

Oh, what the hell.

You're welcome.

Hey, Tammy.

I'm sorry I was so

hard on you, Maynard.

Hey. Yeah, we've gotta

get back on the air.

There's another breaking

story happening here now.

You could never

ruin our Christmas.

Thanks, Doris.

Maynard, forget the things I said.

Merry Christmas.

Thank you.

Thanks.

Maynard, I'm so sorry I said

I'd put my foot up your ass.

It's okay, Millie.

- Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas, Millie.

- Hey, Maynard.

- Jasper.

Thanks for everything, man.

Yeah. Sure.

- Hey.

- Yeah?

You thought you had to become

Bigfoot to save this town,

but you saved it a long

time ago by just being you.

Hi, this is Stacy Gutierrez

reporting live on Christmas Eve

from Greiger's General Store

here in Pottersville,

where the entire community has

turned out in a show of support

for the one-time Bigfoot

hoaxster Maynard Greiger,

to receive him now as

their hometown hero.

Hey, buddy.

It's truly a Christmas miracle.

Hi. Thanks, Maynard.

- Merry Christmas, Maynard.

- Merry Christmas.

- Hey.

- Hey.

What are you doing later?

I think you should close

up and come home.

You can bring the

Bigfoot costume.

I've been wanting to talk

to you for a long time.

I know you have.

You were right.

I know, baby.

Your little bunny's

always right.

No, you were right...

We should split up.

Excuse me?

You should be happy.

You should go and find whatever

excitement you can in life,

if that's what you want.

I get it.

Life is short.

Why not be happy?

That's all I wanted to tell you.

I don't...

Wait. Are you...?

This is it?

Hey, Parker, is that rain check

still available for the Jiffy Pop?

Always.

To Maynard Greiger...

the richest man in Pottersville.

Hear, hear.

Hey. Norm? Tony?

You say people all over the

world love this Bigfoot, right?

Um, yeah.

On every continent and

in every language.

- All of them.

- Yeah.

All right.

Ladies and gentlemen,

I've just received word

it appears that Brock Masterson,

host of Monster Finder,

is also not who he claims to be.

In an exclusive story you'll only

see here on Channel 13 News,

we've discovered that Brock Masterson

is actually one Leonard Abromowitz,

an actor from Coney Island.

Last time I checked, that's

nowhere near Australia.

Well, what do you know?

Hey, you two. What

are you doing?

We're just here to meet

Bill on his lunch break.

This place is amazing, you two.

Thanks, Maynard!

- You bet ya.

- Have fun.

Thanks.

You're a good man, May.

Well, what are you gonna do?

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