Rancho Deluxe Page #3

No, no, we get an exact and complete

description of Baseheart's whereabouts.

He was right

to the point about that.

Can we have the key

to room 203?

Somebody's left

something there for us.

I'd like to go along with you. I've had

complaints about that room all night.

- What kind of

complaints?

- The sound of kind of

honeymooners in that room.

- What name is that room

registered under? - John and Cora brown.

They don't answer the phone. They're

just having the noisiest damn honeymoon,

Lurching into

the furniture and carrying on.

I went up to the door

and knocked.

It sounded like

they were on the bed by that time,

And it was hellacious.

Are you kin?

Kind of.

Hey!

IDo you suppose that

mother had ever charge?

What have you got

in mind for this week?

I wanna spend some time

with my old man.

Hey,

now that's remarkable.

Why do you say that?

Well, I was thinkin'

about visiting my folks.

Is that right?

Yeah, Ive been

thinkin' about it.

Plus I might as well.

I don't see how

we're gonna top this week's performance.

Let's take a vacation.

Come on, old man.

We're gonna float the river.

Ah, Cec, I don't, uh,

feel up to it.

Sh*t you don't.

Got the picnic and I caught

about a hundred big hoppers.

Got a hundred big hoppers?

You got a raft to use?

Just bought a dandy

new McKenzie boat.

Hey-

What are these, Cec?

They're all bacon,

lettuce and tomato.

Could be eatin'

them hoppers.

Old boys on the reservation

used to eat grasshoppers.

Full of nourishment.

Supposed to taste good too.

Let's find out.

Damn, Cecil.

Not bad.

Well, now, daddy,

it's what our forebears done.

Yeah, some of them, Cec.

I mean, we're supposed

to have some royalty in there too.

The prince of Angola

or something.

You ain't doin'

no crime or nothin'? No offense intended.

I don't know what you mean.

I mean, there ain't

no visible means of support.

And this boat, you know,

And that jazzy pickup truck.

I've had about 150 jobs

in the last month.

All right. It's all right.

Let me tell you

another thing.

I see more of this state's

poor cowboys, miners,

Railroaders and Indians

go broke buyin' pickup trucks.

The poor people of this state

are dope fiends for pickup trucks.

As soon as they get

ten cents ahead,

They trade in

on a new pickup truck.

The families, homesteads, schools,

hospitals and happiness of Montana...

have been sold down the river

to buy pickup trucks.

It is a sickness here

worse than alcohol and dope.

It is the pickup truck debt.

And there is no

cure in sight.

Well... I do see

what you mean.

Really.

But I own this truck

in partners with jack,

And we do a good deal

of hauling with it.

Jack, get the front door, would you?

Hello, Anna.

We're going to

leave you two alone.

Jack?

I know I can see

that you really question my judgment-

That's right, mother.

I question your judgment on this.

- Now look, pal-

- Get out.

I'm about to question

your goddamn judgment.

Did you hear me?

I don't know

why they did this.

They left it up to me.

So I came.

I wanted to see you.

I wanted to look at you.

It makes it harder, Anna.

God.

I'd just gotten

so I could come here at all.

I'd just risen to that.

Hey.

How do you like

being single?

I guess it's

the only way I can live.

Jack,

Couldn't I come

and see you?

Anna, why?

So we can work

on each other again?

So we can lock ourselves in the house and...

crawl around and weep

and take tranquilizers,

Talk about suicide

and pointlessness again?

Is that what you wanna do?

Anna, don't you understand yet?

We make each other insane.

Don't you

understand that yet?

God, that last week

we had together.

You were too crazy

to even wash your face.

I had to brush the knots

out of your hair.

We mutilate each other!

Don't you understand that?

I still love you.

I don't care.

I love you and I don't

want any more of it!

I don't want

any more of it!

Are you sure

that's them?

Sure as shootin'.

Is that pretty sure?

That's real sure.

You're not that bad.

You just play for shape

instead of blasting away.

- Are you Indian?

- Part.

IIndians never get

too good at pool.

I thought maybe

you were Jewish.

Or a greaser.

So, as you were saying-

Well...

it's just that old...

john brown has seized on

this rustling because he's...

kind of sad

and bored and all.

And all this

sleuthin' excites him.

What about that, uh, stock detective?

Well-

Where'd that come from?

John has gone and hired

this henry beige.

He's out of

twodot, Montana.

Got a great reputation.

He'll be here tomorrow.

He's pretty old.

Uh. Bringin' his niece

to take care of him.

Doesn't that kind of take away

from old john brown's fun?

I was thinkin'

the same thing.

And I hope not.

He's been sleeping nights

lately instead of, uh,

Ramblin' around

the ranch yard...

with insomnia.

When we recovered

Baseheart of Bozeman canyon,

He was happier than

if we'd never lost him.

Ransom on that

son of a b*tch...

made every stockmen's

paper in the country.

And every regular

paper in the west.

Here you go. Another quarter.

You figure it to be

the same, uh, same rustlers?

You know, the ones

we've been reading about?

I know

who it is.

You do?

Look, if you bring

your man back in the middle each time,

You're gonna play

a lot better. Oh.

'Cause Ive beat you

two straight already and we're gonna play...

best three out of five

for championship of the universe.

Well, who is it?

Who's what?

That's rustling

off your stock?

Oh, come on, jack.

Tell me.

It's you.

No, seriously.

No, I am serious.

You're the rustler.

Now, why do you-

Why do you say that?

Well-

Me and Burt told

the old man...

that we were gonna

come to town and, uh,

Wanted one more chance

to catch the rustlers.

You know, the culprits.

And, we told him we wanted to come

into town and run down some leads.

And, it's-

It was the only way we was

gonna get the night off.

And since you and Cecil

are the only two we've talked to, then, uh,

You gotta be

the hot leads.

But I do have to believe

in my heart that you are the rustlers,

Or my conscience

gonna hurt me and, uh,

Uh, all I wanna do

is drink and play these here bar games.

I believe in fun.

I believe in having it all now.

I believe in hygiene.

I believe

in a good old time.

I believe it gettin'

it all while you can.

Is there anything you

don't believe in, may? Mm-Hmm.

I don't believe

in lettin' your meat loaf.

Uh, may, Id like

to introduce two celebrity friends up here.

IJack, I know who they are.

Burt and curt

of the b-Bar lazy-T.

Yeah, well, anyway-

Now, why don't you

let me tell you.

We're still offering the standard acts,

and jobs at the standard rates.

Although the livestock

has picked up in quality.

We have not

raised our price...

on half and half,

round the world, or your straight shot.

We have, however, cancelled

the old Hershey highway. Oh.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes