Recep Ivedik 4 Page #10

from Recep.

The blue team has 4 people left,

the red team 3.

Recep won.

The blue team has 3 people left,

the red team 2.

That means that from this

moment forward...

...the rules stipulate that with

2 people left on each team...

...we merge the teams and you

compete as individuals.

Tomorrow we'll have a party to celebrate

the merging of the teams.

I'll have some of that chicken, too.

I'm going to have a lot of it.

And a little spaghetti.

And a little Greek salad.

This is what I dreamt of.

I bit that girl for this.

You've ruined the whole meal.

You took it all for yourself.

We're going to eat, too.

You put your hand in the pasta.

You did such gross things.

Sort yourself out.

You've been eating with your hands

for a month and half.

And now you play the gentleman?

He keeps looking at my plate.

You do whatever Recep does.

You eat what Recep eats.

Try to be a little original.

- Take it easy.

- Here, eat it all.

Have some chicken from there.

Gnaw on that.

Do you want some, too?

You'll be hankering for some.

And a little spaghetti.

A little salad and garniture.

You need a balanced meal.

Something from the 3 food groups.

A protein, a carbohydrate, a vegetable.

Salad.

Eat a balanced meal and you'll stay

fit and healthy.

- What's your name?

- Eda.

Eda, nice. I'm Recep Ivedik.

- This is Halil Ibo. Say hi to big sis.

- Hi, big sister.

Big sister? You're both older than me.

What's your birth year?

- I'm '7 too.

- Really? You're '87 too?

I'm '87 too.

We record our births a little

late in the village.

They don't register it straight away.

That's because 2/3 of us

are born morons.

So the family waits,

overwhelmed by grief.

Some are born three-headed.

We had one with eight arms,

Necmi the Octopus.

It keeps happening.

Some are half-man, half-goat.

We record those births at the

Ministry of Rural Affairs.

We call him 'Goatboy'.

But as the poet said, 'You're

only as old as you feel inside.'

What the poet means to say is

that you might look old but how...

...you feel is what's important.

How old do you feel?

- 85-90.

- Why?

Life wore me out.

Life has trampled me.

Poor thing. I feel for you.

- I feel for you.

Eda, I see you're deep in conversation.

You must have a lot in common.

Did you hear a buzzing sound?

I heard something like a

fly or a mosquito.

OK, friends! Welcome.

It's game time at the

team merger party.

I've got a great game for you.

And the name of the game is:

Limbo!

It's a simple dance game

We have two verical bars.

And a horizontal pole. All you do

is go under the pole.

We lower the pole a notch

each time you do. It's simple.

Let me demonstrate.

Music!

Explain it so it makes sense!

You're wobbling all over the place.

Ok. It's easy.

You pass under the pole.

Easy, you say. I haven't beaten anyone

up for one and half months.

But I'm about to explode.

Get out of here. Get lost.

It's simple, Taylan.

If it's so simple, Recep,

let me make you cry uncle.

- You... make me cry uncle?

- That's what I'm going to do.

Oome on, let's do it.

- Are you ready, Taylan?

- I'm ready.

Start the music.

Bravo, Taylan made it.

It's Recep's turn. Oome on, Recep.

It's easy at this level.

I'm staring the music.

- Play it.

Music!

Bravo, Recep! Great!

Now we lower the pole a notch.

Hang on. Lower it two notches.

- Two notches?

- Two, two.

We're lowering it two notches.

Just a minute.

Oan he lower it like that?

If he wants to.

OK, then I want to lower it

two more notches.

- Two more?

- Two more notches.

Recep is lowering it two more notches.

Be careful you don't hurt yourself.

Lower it another one. We've got a

wisecracker. Down another notch.

- Another notch?

- Lower it one more.

We're lowering it another notch.

Recep, you'll wind up in the hospital.

- Lower it another one.

- Are you sure?

He's egging me on.

Take it down another notch.

OK, we're lowering it another notch.

Now one more notch.

- Oan you pass under that?

- Let's say I do.

- How will you do that?

- That's none of your business.

I can't get under that. I can't

lay down under that pole.

You go first,

then I'll go.

- OK, I'm doing it.

- OK, pass under it.

The contest is heating up.

Oan Taylan pass under it

at this height?

Music!

Taylan fell! Taylan fell!

Taylan fell!

It's not possible.

No human could pass under that.

Look at the shape I'm in,

and I couldn't.

How can he do it with that

big belly and fat ass of his?

I'll make it.

I'm telling you I will.

If he makes it

I'll bray like a donkey.

That's quite a dare.

Things have heated up even more.

You'll bray like a donkey if I pass

under that pole?

- I'll bray like a donkey.

- Right here, in front of everyone?

In front of everyone.

Well then, I'll lower it another...

...notch from where he lowered it.

Unbelievable. What a challenge.

It could be a world record.

So Recep, you're saying:

That's not how it's done...

...this is!

- That's exactly what I'm saying.

I'm throwing down the glove.

I'll show you, I'm saying.

- Recep, are you ready?

- Play the music.

Music!

- You're incredible.

- Amazing!

It's a limbo world record.

You're amazing, Recep.

Bravo. Oongratulations.

You get the Mr. Limbo trophy!

- Today I'm Mr. Limbo.

- Bring the trophy.

Hear it one and all.

I'm Mr. Limbo.

It's a nice trophy.

Thank you.

I'll keep it forever.

What happened? You said

I wouldn't make it.

You said my ass was too fat?

You promised to bray like a donkey.

Go on then, bray.

Recep, that's just a

figure of speech.

No it's not, buddy.

Bray like you promised.

Here, in front of everyone.

There are girls here, Recep.

You're going too far.

There are female donkeys, too.

Let me hear you bray.

OK, I'm braying.

What was that. Are you a donkey or

an ambulance?

A donkey brays like this.

Put some soul in it.

Good for you. Everyone needs a

donkey like you. What's your name.

- Taylan.

- Taylan the pylon. Screw you.

That was a great contest.

Mr. Limbo.

- Shut up. That's enough.

Halil.

Halil.

Halil Ibo. Halil Ibo.

Halil, my boy.

Halil Ibo.

- What happened?

- Get up. We've got a mission.

Mission? What time is it?

- A secret mission.

Get me pots and pans, and rope.

No questions. Run.

Oome here.

What are we doing at the toilet

in the middle of the night?

Our mission has two phases.

- What mission?

- Soldiers don't ask questions.

You're a private.

I'm a general.

Don't make me shout.

I'm sorry.

Open that. Pull up the seat.

Take the pot.

Open it wide.

I'm going to throw up.

Boy they sh*t a lot.

Lay down right here.

Lay down.

I'm going to lower you down. OK?

I want you to fill the pot with

whatever's down there.

- I'll throw up.

- No, you won't.

Let's go.

- Dive in.

- I can't believe we're doing this.

- Are you filling it?

- I'm elbow deep.

Fill it up good.

Plaster that pot good.

Pull me up.

Get up, quick.

Nice.

Oome with me. Run.

What do you see over there?

- A game.

- What kind of game.

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