Revenge of the Nerds Page #4

You can all sing along.

The words are really easy.

So I say I gotta be free.

So I say I got... I gotta be me.

- So I say I gotta be free

- Free

- So I say I gotta be me

- Me

I'm saying...

I'm saying you gotta be...

This party isn't going

very well, is it?

I don't know why

everybody's so uptight.

Me either. Maybe we should eat.

Maybe we should watch TV.

Hey, guys.

Wonder joints.

They taste better than they look.

Oh, goody!

Oh, smile pretty, chickies.

Oh, thank you very much.

Thank you, thank you.

Hair pie. Hair pie.

Nothing. Nothing.

Ah!

And I have a micon data link

which hooks this phone to

the computer in the robot.

Hey, this is some good sh*t.

Hair pie? Thank you.

Oh, hair pie?

- You built this yourself?

- Yeah.

I think robots are sexy.

I do too, really.

- Do you wanna dance?

- Okay.

Damn! You Mu's sure can party!

- Come on. Let's go.

- Where?

- Up to your room.

- You wanna go up to my room?

Yeah.

- Are you nearsighted or farsighted?

- Nearsighted.

- So am I.

- Really?

Yeah. You wanna switch glasses?

Gilbert, we almost have

the same prescription.

Yeah. Listen, um,

would you like to dance?

Yeah.

Yeah, well, uh, when

I was in high school,

I was thinking mostly of

the, uh, aerospace field.

But when I got into college,

I decided that I wanted something

a little more challenging.

So, um, I switched to computers.

And, uh, now aerodynamics

is just sort of a hobby.

Wait, wait. No, no, wait.

Would you rather live in the ascendancy

of a civilization or during its decline?

Poindexter, do you

wanna f*** or not?

You know, if, uh, we get

into Lambda Lambda Lambda

we could be your partners

in the homecoming carnival.

I know. That'd be so great.

Yeah. This party sure

worked out well.

Get 'em out of here!

Old MacDonald had a farm

E-I-E-I-O

And on that farm he had

some pigs. E-I-E-I-O

We thought you could use some

more pigs for your party, nerds.

With an oink, oink here

and an oink, oink there

Here an oink, there an oink

Everywhere an oink, oink

Old MacDonald had a farm

E-I-E-I-O

- F*** you!

- F***ing-A!

F*** you!

We'll never get into

Lambda Lambda Lambda now.

Yeah, those jocks

ruined everything.

I say we blow their

f***ing houses up.

No, we can't resort to violence.

That'll just bring us

down to their level.

- What do we do?

- We got to beat 'em at their own game.

We've got to become the

best fraternity on campus.

You know, if we win that

homecoming carnival,

we can take over the presidency

of the Greek Council.

That would drive 'em crazy.

But, Gilbert,

if we don't get approved by the

Tri-Lambs, we won't even be a fraternity.

- I say we blow the f***ers up.

- No, we can't do that.

But you're right.

Their action tonight

demands an immediate retaliation.

And if we don't, we're nothing

but the nerds they say we are.

I know what we're gonna do.

Down! Down! Down!

Come on!

E-I-E-I-O

With an oink, oink here

And an oink, oink there

Here an oink

Everywhere an oink, oink

- Where?

- Right there.

- Isn't this gonna make a lot of noise?

- It's got a built-in silencer.

Camera. The periscope.

- Hey, Suzy.

- Hi, Betty.

God, that was fun tonight.

- We were the highlight of their party.

- I know.

- God, those pigs sure were greasy, too.

- I have to get the smell off.

Oh, I know.

Listen, if Stan calls, tell him

I'll call him back, okay?

Okay.

Panty raid!

It's a panty raid!

Panty raid!

Hey!

What are you... What are you doing?

Give me those back! Come here! Hey!

Wormser, how many cameras

do we have left?

- Four.

- Okay.

Step aside, mama. I wanna

see some of that muff.

Hair pie. Hair pie!

That nerd saw me naked!

Oh! Get out!

Out! Out! Out! Get out!

- Hiya, buddy.

- Hi!

- Isn't college great?

- This is going to be a great year.

Get out of here!

Hair pie! Hair pie!

Stan's gonna kill you!

Get out! Jerks!

Ooh!

We love you when you're mad!

- Almost there, Wormser?

- This should do it.

Oh.

- Ah.

- Good.

That looks good, Lamar.

This is a stationary camera.

- We've got Pi's.

- Mmm.

You got other angles, Lamar?

- Go to their room.

- Yeah, go in their room.

Yeah. Perfect. Good.

- Arnold, that's her.

- Go to the right.

Arnold, that's the girl we saw.

- Go up. Go up. Go up.

- Up?

Wait a second. Hold it

right there, Lamar.

Don't move the camera.

Yeah!

Oh, no.

I drink to that.

Yes. I like that nightie.

- That's very good.

- Can you go in that room?

Okay.

Here she comes.

God, take your towel off, please.

Come on. Remove it.

There's somethin' comin' up.

Yes! Is it cold in there or what?

Nature's thermometers.

- Focus! Focus it, Lamar.

- Focus!

Just kidding.

This is bullshit.

I want bush. Pan down.

We've got bush. We've got bush!

Hair pie!

I'm tired of watching

'em brush their teeth.

See if Betty's up.

Dooley, throw me a beer.

Thanks.

Oh, I getting tired of Betty.

Are you kidding? Zoom in.

I could never get tired of Betty.

How could you ever get tired

of that ass, Takashi?

Oh, I see your point.

Are you guys still

watching the Pi's?

- Yes.

- Have you been up all night?

Yes.

- Wormser, haven't you had enough?

- No.

Well, I think we got

even with the Pi's.

Now we got a little score to

settle with the Alpha Betas.

Sh*t, Hank, What is that stuff?

- Liquid heat.

- It burns.

You oughta feel it when

I don't mix it with water.

Get them!

Make pile here.

Hurry.

Okay. Here goes.

Go for it.

Okay, don't... Don't touch now.

- Okay. Okay.

- Here. Hit this one.

Looks like salad.

The key to each

season is homecoming.

You win that one, you got

your alumni support.

You got your alumni support,

you got that jock dorm,

you get the laundry money,

you get the new cars.

Now, this season started out fine.

We won some big ball games!

But we were lucky.

We can't get soft.

We can't sit back on our laurels.

We win homecoming, we take league.

We take league, we get a bowl bid.

It's as simple as that.

But, gentlemen,

you have got to want it.

Do you want it?

- Yeah!

- I can't hear you!

- Yeah!

- Yes!

We can't let up!

We gotta stay tough.

You can do it! You can do it!

- You can do it!

- God!

You gotta believe

that you can do it!

- You gotta let them know that you want it!

- I want it!

Good!

- Shower up!

- Oh, God.

Sh*t, we forgot to practice.

You put what?

Liquid heat.

- On their what?

- In their jocks.

- That's outrageous.

- Are you angry, U.N.?

No! I'm not angry.

I'm glad to see you...

You guys finally fought back.

I think you'll make a fine addition to Tri

Lambda, and I wanna welcome you aboard.

- Congratulations.

- All right!

- You'll tell the guys?

- I will!

Okay, everybody ready?

Okay, I focus now. I set timer.

Now say, "Hi, U.N."

Hi, U.N.!

Well, I'd like to propose

a toast to U.N. Jefferson,

who, in his ultimate wisdom,

chose to accept us

into our new fraternity,

Lambda Lambda Lambda.

Lambda Lambda Lambda!

Before we take this

matter to a vote,

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes