Richard Pryor Live on the Sunset Strip Page #4

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You'll get the wrong idea.

But, man...

I was gonna find my roots. Right?

Seven hundred million black people.

Not one of them motherfuckers

knew me.

I looked in every phone book

in Africa.

I didn't find one goddamn Pryor.

I saw one familiar name:

J-Bone Walker.

I called that up.

They say he's in Arizona.

But there's nothin' like goin'

and seein' nothin' but black.

Black people. From the wino

to the president. It's black people.

And it's. Like, fair.

You know what I mean?

You go someplace.

You're on liberated land.

I said, "These motherfuckers

kick ass and got their country.

And I'm on the land.

It's black people."

I mean. Black. Original black.

You understand "black"?

I mean. So many black people,

it made me realize...

somebody in my family

had been lying to me.

It's nice. As you land at the airport.

You look out the window...

and see the black people and say.

"Oh. Wow!"

People are the same.

The people in Africa

f*** over your luggage...

just like the people in New York.

You know what's funny?

To walk down the street...

and see white people

looking tor each other.

They'd be surrounded, and...

Every black person I saw there seemed

to remind me of someone from here.

I'd walk down the street and go, "That

motherf***er looked like Joe Frazier!"

I'd say, "Goddamn!"

He'd be the president of the bank.

I'd go, "Goddamn!

I wish Joe Frazier

could see this motherf***er!"

Or someone here. Like,

is a wino...

you see him over there.

They be a diplomat.

You go, "Willie the wino!

Goddamn!

Get down, Willie!"

This was. I don't know.

Special to me, man.

I went to the jungle,

the real jungle.

Not that sh*t Tarzan live in.

Tarzan wouldn't last a week in Africa.

"Where's Tarzan?"

"You mean the crazy white man?

He in the trees with cheetah."

"Where's Jane?"

"She whoring in Nairobi."

'Cause when you go out in the bush...

you see animals...

I mean, animals that are tree

look different...

than that sh*t we see in the zoo.

You know them animals

you f*** over at the zoo?

You see the lion at the zoo.

You be talkin' about...

You walk by. "Hey. Lion."

I like the monkeys in the zoo.

'Cause they throw their sh*t on you.

They'd be pickin' and sh*t.

They watch you, and one of 'em go...

And then everybody laughs.

"Oh, he's so cute.

Oh, aren't the monkeys cute?"

Why do people think

bears are happy in the zoo?

"Look at the bear. He's so happy."

Motherf***er's talkin' about...

"Let me out.

Just give me a break.

If I could get a hand

on one of you motherfuckers.

Oh. I'll tear your ass up.

I ain't had no p*ssy in 12 years!

Send me a motherfuckin' panda.

B*tch ain't even got a p*ssy.

They're wonderin' why

we ain't got no babies"

But in the jungle,

if you see a rabbit you get nervous.

'Cause a rabbit be lookin' at you...

"Roll the window up. Dear."

"It's just a rabbit."

"F*** you.

Ain't no rabbit

ever looked at me like that."

And you see a lion in the jungle,

that's what they look like... lions.

Motherf***er be in the bush

talkin' about...

"Yeah. Get your ass out of the car.

And bring that camera with you.

'Cause we gonna eat all that sh*t."

I saw three lionesses chase down.

Like, a cape buffalo.

That's the baddest motherf***er

on four legs...

except for these b*tches

chasin' it.

And the lionesses. They work around

in teams. Give signals

You know they can't talk.

And the buffalo

saw one of them, right?

He tipped away from the rest

of the herd.

And them two others jumped on his ass.

The other buffalo said...

"The motherf***er didn't warn us.

F*** him."

And you know how

a buzzard circles in the movies?

These motherfuckers

drove up in a truck.

Talkin' about. "What it is?"

Cheetah, man, is the weirdest thing

to see go chase something...

'cause you don't see nothin' but dust.

I saw two cheetahs.

It looked like they were talkin'...

about jumpin' on some gazelle.

"You want to go after that herd?"

"Say, nah. Man,

they're too close. Sh*t.

Why don't we give 'em

another 100 yards.

How's the wife and family. Man?

You know. It's gonna be

tourist season soon.

I got an arm last year.

They're about far enough. You ready?"

The gazelles and sh*t

hear them motherfuckers.

They'd be eating and hear 'em and just

start runnin'. They wouldn't even look.

"Run!"

And the motherf***er

that can't hear is in trouble.

"What?"

"Cheetah!"

"Huh?"

"Cheetah!"

"What?"

"Cheetah!"

"What'd you say?"

"It's your ass!"

"I got ya."

I saw one of them gazelles

make a move on a cheetah.

It was embarrassing.

The cheetah got pissed off too...

'cause he was ready to get the gazelle.

And the gazelle said...

And that motherf***er tell 400 yards

trying to stop.

And got up:

"I'm gonna get you. Motherf***er.

Make me look bad"

We picked up a hitchhiker one day.

An African man got in the car.

And he had that odor.

You know?

This motherf***er had odor!

He was in the car.

You be drivin'. That odor was...

And he'd lean over to point...

And you'd be, you know...

"Goddamn!

I know my people. But goddamn!"

And I looked in the rear view mirror.

And this motherf***er was goin'...

"Oh, sh*t!

That motherfuckin' cologne

and sh*t they got on.

Stinkin' motherfuckers. Boy.

I don't know how

I can take this sh*t."

He had his head out the window

tryin' to get air and sh*t.

He's goin'. "Goddamn!"

He just ended up makin' us stop.

"Let me out of this motherf***er. I'll

walk. F*** it. You motherfuckers stink.

Kiss my ass."

One thing I got out of it was magic.

I'd like to share it with you.

I was leavin',

and I was sittin' in the hotel...

and a voice said to me.

"Look around. What do you see?"

And I said. "I see all colors

of people doing everything."

And the voice said,

"Do you see any n*ggers?"

And I said. "No."

And it say. "You know why?

'Cause there aren't any."

And it hit me like a shot, man.

I started cryin' and sh*t.

I was sittin' there and said...

"Yeah. I've been here three weeks.

I haven't even said it.

I haven't even thought it."

And it made me say.

"Oh. My God. I've been wrong.

I've been wrong.

I've got to regroup my sh*t."

I said, "I ain't gonna never call

another black man a n*gger."

You know. 'cause

we never was no n*ggers.

That's a word that's used

to describe our own wretchedness.

And we perpetuate it now,

'cause it's dead.

That word's dead.

We're men and women.

We come from the first people

on the Earth.

You know?

The first people on the Earth

were black people.

'Cause anthropologists...

white anthropologists...

The white people go.

"That could be true, you know."

Yeah. Dr. Leakey and them

found people remains...

five million years ago in Africa.

You know them motherfuckers

didn't speak French.

So black people,

we the first people that had thought.

We were the first ones to say.

"Where the f*** am I?

And how do you get to Detroit?"

So you can take it

for what it's worth.

I ain't tryin' to preach. I'm just

talkin' about my feelings about it.

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