Romance on the High Seas Page #5

They inspire

They're for hire

Aye

Aye, the tourist trade

Habana

That's Havana.

They murder the language

But we love 'em

We want more of 'em

The Yankee dollar ain't hay

The tourist trade, the tourist trade

Aye, it's all for the tourist trade

If you're romantic

The Cuban stars

Made to order for soft guitars

You must fall in love when they're played

They inspire

They're for hire

Aye

Aye, the tourist trade

It's a settin'

Past forgettin'

Once you see it

You'll agree

It's all for the tourist trade

Hey, I love that stuff

Hello, New York?

Havana calling Mr. Michael Kent.

Plaza 43444.

Desires to reverse charges.

Reverse charges?

Just one moment, please.

Havana calling, Mr. Kent.

Wishes to reverse the charges.

Oh, yes. l'll accept it.

Hello.

Yes, yes, l'll accept the charges.

-Hello. Who?

-lt's me, Peter Virgil.

We're in Havana.

l thought l'd call and give you the news.

Yes, yes, of course.

Well, what is the news?

-No news.

-What do you mean ''no news ''?

She hasn't looked at another man.

Professionally, l'm very disappointed.

Well, personally, l'm not.

You mean she hasn't spoken

to another man?

Well, she's spoken to me.

What? You two

know each other already?

Well, naturally,

I had to make her acquaintance.

Well, was it difficult?

Tell me, who spoke first?

l did--

Look, don't worry.

The slogan of my firm is

''Never kiss a client's wife.''

Well, don't change slogans

in mid-ocean.

-Hello, is this Mrs. Elvira Kent?

-Yes.

lt is? Well, this is

Mrs. Elvira Kent speaking.

Oh, excuse me, this is Georgia,

Georgia Garrett.

l'm taking my work so seriously

l don't know who l am.

Good. Have you been sticking

close to your cabin?

Have I? I've only spoken to one man,

and he's harmless, quite.

l thought l warned you about that.

l figured if l don't speak to any men at all,

it's sure to attract attention to me.

Oh, by the way, Mrs. Kent,

l know it's not my business...

...but have you got anything

on your husband?

l'm afraid his conduct

has been impeccable.

-Caught him with the goods.

-That means he's been behaving himself.

Too bad. Well, maybe he'll do something

unimpeccable before l come back.

Goodbye. And look,

keep in touch with me, will you?

Okay. Goodbye.

l thought you were waiting outside.

Well, l suddenly remembered

l had to call New York.

-Girlfriend, huh?

-No, no, business. And you?

l was calling New York too.

-Boyfriend, huh?

-Better than a boyfriend. My husband.

-You were talking to your husband just now?

-l just hung up.

-Does that surprise you?

-Yes, it certainly does. l--

Poor darling.

He was home waiting for my call.

He's quite a treasure.

l think l'll send him a letter.

Well, don't you have to write it first?

Oh, no, l'm way ahead

on my letter writing.

Bless his heart.

-Look, do you see a doorway over there?

-Sure.

-Do you hear somebody singing?

-Sure.

Well, then l guess l'm not crazy.

Shall we absorb some of the local color?

Let's.

Table for two, please.

Bring us a couple of drinks

of something tall and cool.

Oh, Havana. lsn't it romantic?

You know,

you amaze me.

You made this trip 100 times,

yet you make it sound like it's the first.

You know what my secret is?

-No, what?

-No.

No, come on, tell me.

Well, l keep telling myself

this is my first trip.

Pedro, you must teach me that song.

Oh, you speak Spanish.

Just like a native.

We have so many requests for this song.

And l have some English lyrics.

-Oh, thank you.

-Will be 25 cents, please.

The tourist trade.

Aye, the tourist trade.

You sigh, the song begins

You speak and I hear violins

It's magic

The stars desert the skies

And rush to nestle in your eyes

It's magic

Without a golden wand

Or mystic charms

Fantastic things begin

When I am in your arms

When we walk hand in hand

The world becomes a wonderland

It's magic

How else can I explain those rainbows

When there is no rain?

It's magic

Why do I tell myself

These things that happen

Are all really true?

When in my heart I know the magic

Is my love for you

Gee, now, that's a beautiful song.

It's magic

There's something about the way you sing,

l don't know, it does something to me.

It's magic

Why do I tell myself

These things that happen

Are all really true?

-When in my heart I know

-When in my heart I know

-The magic is my love for you

-The magic is my love for you

Here you are.

-Will you have dinner with me tonight?

-Why not?

We've had it together

every night so far.

-Just a moment, sir.

-l gotta catch that boat.

Your tickets.

Don't you trust me?

Your table or mine?

Say, l've got an idea.

What about table nine?

-Table nine?

-That's in a nice dark corner.

-Georgia.

-What's the matter?

Nothing. lf l'm gonna be ready in time,

l'd better start dressing right now.

-Wait a minute. What's the hurry?

-l'll see you later.

Georgia.

May l help you, sir?

Well, you're not exactly my type,

but you can take my bags.

-Good evening, madam.

-Good evening.

-Did you give the message to Mr. Virgil?

-Yes, madam.

l told him that you weren't having dinner

because you were indisposed.

-Thank you.

-Yes, madam.

-Did you bring a little herring?

-Yes, madam. Marinated.

The purse is right over there,

help yourself.

lt's all right, l overtip.

Thank you so much, ma'am.

-Who is it?

-lt's me, Peter. How do you feel?

Terrible. Just terrible.

Well, we'll fix you right up.

l brought a doctor.

l don't need a doctor.

l just want to be left alone.

But l can't stand in this passageway

all night, young lady.

lt's drafty,

and l'm catching cold.

Take two aspirins and go to bed.

Thank you very much.

lt sounds like a very good idea. l'll do that.

But first, l'll have to examine you.

lt might be something contagious,

you know.

All right, doctor. Just a minute.

Come in.

You better stay outside.

We don't want to start an epidemic.

Now, tell me, where does it hurt?

Everywhere.

Oh, well, then, l suppose

we should start looking someplace.

-Yes, let me see your tongue.

-What's the matter?

Oh, l get dizzy when l bend.

l must be coming down with something.

Oh, thank you very much, yes.

Oh, may l feel your pulse?

Yes.

You might as well feel mine.

lf you'd be so kind. Thank you.

Yes, your pulse is normal.

Yours is fast.

l was sure of it.

Well, l suppose

l ought to tap something.

-Here.

-Oh, thank you so much.

Now say, ''Ah.''

-My diagnosis was correct.

-What do you recommend, doctor?

-A sea voyage.

-A sea--

But then we're on one, aren't we?

l'm so sorry. How silly of me.

l'll give you an injection

and put you to sleep.

That shouldn't do you any harm.

Will it hurt, doctor?

Well, it shouldn't,

but l'm a bit clumsy, you know.

-Couldn't l just read myself to sleep?

-No, l'm afraid not. Now just one moment.

l feel faint.

Who got jabbed, me or you?

l seem to smell food odors.

That's always a bad sign.

And herring too.

Why do l smell herring?

l guess there's a school of herring

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